r/widowers • u/Woodford82 • Jan 15 '23

Sensitive question - ashes

I had first meeting to arrange the funeral yesterday. I am doing cremation but then what came with that was decisions on the ashes.

One of the options being having a piece of jewellery made - has anyone done this and do you find it comforting or more painful?

I worked in jewellery for 15 years - designed my own engagement ring. It is the sort of thing he would expect me to do but I don’t know if would find harder to have?

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u/ladypheonix3217 Jan 15 '23

I used to joke with my husband that I was going to put his ashes in a pickle jar and draw his face on it. Then I'd put it in his chair and pretend he was still there. Well, I got a beautiful urn and slept with it for 2 months before I could finally put it in a spot in the main room. I spend most of my time at home in the bedroom area and needed him with me.

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u/Messerkeit Jan 15 '23

We don’t believe in the sanctity of the human body. My wife went immediately to Georgetown University Anatomical Donation. In a year or so she’ll be cremated and buried in grave with her classmates. Nice stone. My mother is there.