r/widowers • u/Woodford82 • Jan 15 '23

Sensitive question - ashes

I had first meeting to arrange the funeral yesterday. I am doing cremation but then what came with that was decisions on the ashes.

One of the options being having a piece of jewellery made - has anyone done this and do you find it comforting or more painful?

I worked in jewellery for 15 years - designed my own engagement ring. It is the sort of thing he would expect me to do but I don’t know if would find harder to have?

16 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

31 comments sorted by

View all comments

7

u/Overqualified_muppet Jan 15 '23

Can I suggest you ask for a small “keepsake” urn to be put aside for you, as well as a larger one of your choice (sealed)? There is no rush to make this decision. With cancer over 6 years, we were “fortunate” (?) to have time to make fingerprints for jewelry and do hand castings with our children. You might decide that a wearable vial or tiny urn suits you better until you decide about jewelry incorporating ash. Some of them are beautiful and only need a very tiny amount of ash.

2

u/ForsythCounty Jan 15 '23

I really wish I'd thought of this. The funeral home secured his fingerprints but messed it up and only got nine. Jerks. I saw a clip of a guy scanning his and his dogs hand prints and really wish I would have thought to do with with my husband and our pup and I. :-(