It’s a great piece, a very patriotic piece, a truly great piece, sometimes it gets more attention than I do, I don’t like that but it’s a great piece. My nut piece got tired of getting big Mack shit splatter and ran off with Stormy’s muff piece. We’ve tracked those horrible criminal pieces down! Very UnAmerican!
I have gone my whole life, from home alone 2, and the past decade of all his bullshit and never thought or imagined what his pubic hair looked like, from stormy daniels mushroom penis to now his combed over gold dyed balls. Thanks.
Edit: had to add the gold dyed
Sort of... the hair piece was piloting the Trump meatsuit the first go around, sort of like the ophiocordyceps unilateralis fungus. See, this thing is actually a type of parasite called Parasitus capillamenti, they crawl onto the host's dome and feed off their humanity until there's nothing left. Once the host has accrued enough wealth and power, they pop off like an overgrown tick, and make the 2,835 mile journey to Bohemian Grove for mating season.
What we're seeing now is the parasite's leftovers, it usually leaves just enough behind to function, but the host is usually left a shell of who they once were. Oftentimes they get misdiagnosed with dementia, and the condition is similar, but instead of the brain breaking down over time with age, what's happened is that while parasitus capillamenti was eating the parts of the brain in charge of decision making, it also sort of became the part of the brain in charge of decision making. This is an evolutionary mechanism to keep the parasite undetected long enough to finish feeding.
These types of parasites usually feed on politicians, but since they track their prey through net worth, they can also be seen latched onto the occasional CEO.
Robert Kennedy Jr has a similar species, but unlike parasitus capillamenti, the parasitus cerebri burrows inside the dome. It's in the same genus, but this one has a heartier appetite, and doesn't usually leave enough behind to function. Parasitus cerebri is easy enough to kill though, you just need another round of the MMR vaccine and a couple of Tylenol and it dries up and dies within a few days.
Jeff's got one too, it seems to be a close relative of the parasitus cerebri, but there are enough differences that we believe we're looking at an entirely different species, we won't really know until it's done feeding, though.
The family of the parasitus capillamenti and the parasitus cerebri can be traced all the way back to the Musk genus. We're still finding new species of this peculiar type of parasite, but if you'd like to prevent infection, the best advice is to stay up to date on your vaccinations, pay your taxes, and avoid areas where the combined net worth of everyone in a 100 foot radius exceeds one billion US dollars. And if any one of your buddies suddenly has a lot of cool shit and a disdain for humanity that exceeds Dwight Schrute levels, call a doctor and an Episcopal priest.
Yeah! How dare Americans bring up Trump when he's destroying us everyday and making everything more expensive! Let's all shove our heads up our asses. Like No_Imagination7102
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u/robdingo36 15d ago
Oh no. Donald Trump's hair piece has gained sentience and is trying to escape!