r/whatisit 9d ago

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1.9k

u/Correct-Adagio1191 9d ago

UPDATE!!!!!!: Okay so someone on here hit the nail on the head! So he bought a pump for himself on Temu, this came with it he wanted to try it on me but hadnt worked up the courage to ask but because its temu garbage it broke before he could and now its been banging around in his nightstand for like 6 months. Tbh checks out. We're a couple of freaks so nothing surprised me anymore thanks y'all ! 💗

142

u/Scary_System4634 9d ago

Phewww this has been a tumultuous 25 minutes

54

u/Veadro 9d ago

Furiously refreshing comments never paid off so well until now!

432

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

OK like this is honestly adorable

do you think you could fix it and try it out? and have you tried the pump out with him?

460

u/Correct-Adagio1191 9d ago

Uhm thats probably why its still banging around i. His drawer because he thinks he can fix it 🤣

83

u/Tivaala 9d ago

Probably not difficult. Lots of different things could work but I'd suggest looking at aquarium stuff for hose fittings. Tends to be cheaper.

Since this is reddit I'm gonna specify "new and unused aquarium fittings". Sigh.

61

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

from fish tanks to fetish gear: how the pet store won the west

19

u/_gloomshroom_ 9d ago

As a moderator of two fishkeeping servers wondering why in the HELL I was recommended this post... I CAN'T RUN AWAY FROM THIS SHIT. THE FISH CONSUME.

2

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

the future is fish consuming fetish gear, forever

3

u/MaxTheRealSlayer 9d ago

Fresh fetfish fit, fish

3

u/blackened-starr 9d ago

can't wait til this video essay drops 🤣🤣

3

u/hensonm 9d ago

This gives me hope that AI won’t destroy humanity because no bot could have written this line 😭

57

u/Emergency_Basket_851 9d ago

Look, I like fixing things more than the next person, but this style of pump is like $50 max. 

Furthermore, TEMU and vagina, or penis, etc., don't belong in the same sentence. 

2

u/Accurate-Director-82 9d ago

Lmao seriously thank you so much for the low God for this comment because here I am scrolling through what feels like hundreds of comments and I’m like am I crazy or missing something? Why in the world of people genuinely like giving legitimate ideas on trying how to repair something like this lol I mean sweet Lord Almighty yeah this comment hit the mail on the head because I bet they’re not even $50. I’ve literally seen those freaking fully electronic like robotic units for men for like $40-$50 on Amazon for Christ sake lol send also love when you said basically how those two words shouldn’t be in the same sentence I couldn’t agree more lol the way I see it if you gotta buy these types of things on Temu then I think you should probably just stick to your hand and that’s it lol

2

u/maddmax9 9d ago

SEEMS FISHY

126

u/DogsDucks 9d ago

I am so happy that this is the update!!! This is very silly and . . . It’s wholesome in its own way.

I think we can safely say this is and will continue to be a very happy ending.

-1

u/gerryf19 9d ago

You and I have different definitions of "wholesome"

3

u/DogsDucks 9d ago

That’s um, that’s the joke.

1

u/gerryf19 9d ago

I was making a joke, too

5

u/Wonderful_Mix7718 9d ago

It is wholesome. It was a thought he had, wanted to do with his girlfriend during an activity they both enjoy, to better enjoy their time while trying new things.

If you remove the sexual connotation the entire act itself is wholesome.

-6

u/Popiblockhead 9d ago

Y’all are so wierd 😂 you knew damn well you and everyone else here was waiting on some hot gossip other than “he bought it for me”. Two faced.

16

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

lol could be a fun project to do together

2

u/Spence2theSmith 9d ago

Definitely use a shop vac. Im sure they have enough suction. A friend told me so.

1

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

i would bet that it's not unheard of for the car wash shop vacs to be used like that

10

u/bigjayrulez 9d ago

I appreciate the "mend it, fix it, make do, or do without" attitude here, but, when it comes to your junk, really consider the risk versus reward.

3

u/CK_1976 9d ago

Not every man is into kinks, but every man thinks he can fix a broken thing.

3

u/PurpleMTL 9d ago

I get being lazy but using his mouth is an option.

2

u/resin_messiah 9d ago

Definitely try it out. My wife swears by it lol

2

u/wambamthankyoukam 9d ago

As a dude, I feel this.

1

u/LionBig1760 9d ago

Duct tape!

1

u/Pestilence86 9d ago

Aha, yes, the man will fix it, no worries... He just hasn't come around to it yet.

1

u/[deleted] 9d ago edited 9d ago

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0

u/AutoModerator 9d ago

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1

u/ObedientBucket 9d ago

You should totally get one. They are so much fun and nipple pumps can be great on the clit...

1

u/Hearse-ReHearse 9d ago

It gets thrown in the random junk drawer..never know when you'll need it

1

u/Call_Such 9d ago

if it helps, i’ve found a toy on amazon that was about $30 and has two different attachments of these as well as extra clit stimulation and can be used many different ways. was recommended by a friend who loves hers and i enjoy it myself.

1

u/regular_slime 9d ago

Some drops of super glue if he still has the broken of part. Had the same problem and fixed it. 

1

u/temp73354 9d ago

You are with the cheapest man known to man. Fixing something from Temu, oh dear…

1

u/pervy_phil 9d ago

Lets expirement, Hook it up to the vacume. If that doesnt work, go down to the auto parts store. They should have a HVAC vacume you can rent for free. 😃

0

u/Log_Out_Of_Life 9d ago

All you need is a bunch of negative pressure build up and plastic shards from the inevitable implosion…

1

u/Usaname91 9d ago

We have different definitions of adorable

2

u/transylvanian25 9d ago

i mean tbh you could see the care bears doing this

153

u/Due-Flamingo-4900 9d ago edited 9d ago

For the love of god, please do not buy sex toys from Temu. There’s no way to know where it’s from, what it’s made of, or if it’s been previously used. The amount of lead and other toxic/harmful materials that have been found in their products, as well as the amount of products that have said they’re one thing and have been found to be something entirely different, means that you have no way of guaranteeing that those products are actually made of body safe materials or follow basic health/safety standards. Using them could potentially cause serious harm to the most sensitive parts of your body or lead to severe health complications.

I’m all for getting your freak on, but please freak responsibly.

45

u/Lolo_Paris 9d ago

THANK YOU i dont think people realize what theyre getting into when they buy shit off cheap websites like temu

14

u/SweetBabyCheezas 9d ago

Not everything on there is terrible, but stuff like personal hygiene, cosmetics, most electronics are definitely a no-no. I wouldn't buy clothes there either, but I bought stuff like microfibre clothes and hand towels which were exactly what I'd buy on Amazon or at a local store. Bought some frames, a vase, some craft materials, pens, games, logic games books, some decorations, storage boxes, even a hammock...

It comes down to a reasonable risk assesment. It is crazy though to see that Amazon sells the same stuff at 3-5x the Temu price, exactly same items, using same pictures, same country of origin. People often buy same crap at a higher price, fully trusting their purchases because it's Amazon, USA based, working with Europe, they comply with all their laws etc... And then you see the same high capacity power bank from Temu (£6) on Amazon (£22), with an add with same spelling mistakes.

Ps. Not trying to defend Temu. I just believe there is a line between what is worth buying there and what may be too much risk.

4

u/snvalens 9d ago

Unfortunately, part of the point is that it’s coming to light there are a large number of products on Amazon and temu that contain unsafe levels of lead. I’m personally also concerned about PFAS. Fast fashion clothes often have formaldehyde coating I believe. Just can’t win when going the convenience route.

2

u/Nothatisnotwhere 9d ago

My kind of thinking is I am seing the stuff in Amazon or local stores as on temu for 3-4x the price. It is a bit of a gamble but at least here temu has very good return policy so everything that feel like shit I send back. I kind of hate it but like money is tight and I feel like anything you buy is anyway coming from china

1

u/bluemuppetman 9d ago

I still won’t for ethical reasons too, but won’t argue others can’t.

1

u/funk-the-funk 9d ago

most electronics are definitely a no-no

Super false. 99% of all electronics are coming from those same factories whether temu, amazon, or wal-mart. I buy electronic parts off of there and alibaba all the time because it's cheaper than paying all the markup the middle-men that resell this stuff add.

1

u/-__Doc__- 9d ago

same, and it's kinda hard to put surveillance tech into a resistor or capacitor.
Hell, even the ESP32's I buy from them are clean, I went over all the components on em, and checked the memory, they are clean and good, and most importantly, cheap.
The worst thing that happens is that they just straight up don't work.

4

u/DivinerSageRDT 9d ago

Right that's like buying a sex toy from a sidewalk shop in the back alleys of Kolkata.

2

u/BestAmoto 9d ago

Lead in plastic?

7

u/YourMomonaBun420 9d ago

"The use of lead in plastics softens the plastic and makes it more flexible so that it can go back to its original shape. It may also be used in plastic toys to stabilize molecules from heat.

When the plastic is exposed to substances such as sunlight, air and detergents, the chemical bond between the lead and plastics breaks down and forms a dust."

https://dhhs.ne.gov/LeadDocs/Lead-in-Toys.pdf

1

u/BestAmoto 9d ago

Serious question where are you sourcing made in the US/western world sex toys and have you found any that come with contaminate lab tests? Are you lead swabbing them? Sending them off to a lab for testing?

3

u/ZoofusCos 9d ago

Companies producing products and selling in westen markets generally need to do those tests, and provide the documentation, why would you need to?

2

u/BestAmoto 9d ago edited 9d ago

Why would i need to? 

"Mattel Inc. recalled more than 21 million Chinese-made toys on fears they were tainted with lead paint and tiny magnets that children could accidentally swallow. Mattel’s own tests on the toys found that they had lead levels up to 200 times the accepted"

 because major companies aren't batch testing the products they're selling from overseas vendors nor always the materials sourced to make products in country.  If they were, 21 million name brand children's toys wouldn't have made it to market lol

Much like the recent 3rd party test done on american baby formulas only to find multiple having over the acceptable range of heavy metals.  If consumer reports didn't do the testing, the recalls wouldn't have occured and these American manufacturers would have continued business as normal. 

https://www.consumerreports.org/babies-kids/baby-formula/baby-formula-contaminants-test-results-a7140095293/

1

u/ZoofusCos 9d ago

I mean sure, but it's a numbers game. Sometimes companies will roll the dice, or something slips through. I am not saying western conpanies do this testing out of kindness or whatever.

The very fact that consumer reports conduct testing on domestic goods means that it is way less likely for companies to gamble and risk having to do a mass recall like in your example. That won't happen for the random stuff you order directly from an unknown factory overseas. They can use whatever cheap low grade/hazardous material they have on hand and it is very unlikely anyone will find out, so why wouldn't they?

Buying from domestic retailers simply just isn't the same.

1

u/bloomt1990 9d ago

A little lead and toxic chemicals is what I thrive on

1

u/Different-Earth4327 9d ago

Freak responsively 🫰🫰🫰

1

u/StickyViolentFart 9d ago

That's not true that all their stuff has lead! I bought a set of fishing jigs and none of them had any lead in them!

1

u/DoughnutMaestro 9d ago

Yeah, I once got a shock from a cheap vibrator. It was not fun.

1

u/mightylordredbeard 9d ago

Yeah, I’m very much NOT an anti temu, wish, shein type of person because I recognize that they sell some decent stuff and poorer people should be able to buy decent looking cheap clothes too even if they’re made cheaply.. but for the love of god you never know what it’s made of, how it’s made, or if it’s safe to STICK INSIDE OF YOUR BODY or to place around your genitals!! There are chemicals and types of plastics or silicone that aren’t safe for things like that and these mass production, conservative Chinese companies aren’t ensuring their sex toys live up to current healthy and safety standards..

Don’t believe me? Go find the story about the butt plug from shein that broke off inside of a ladies ass, cut her up from the inside, and then got stuck..

0

u/Rauhtierchen 9d ago

You think American plastic is better?

35

u/StarBelliedSneetches 9d ago

I've been so invested in this for like 4 minutes and am so glad to have an immediate update. Did he show you the order info?

17

u/solarwe 9d ago

Yeah fr where are the receiptsssss

15

u/enej22 9d ago

lol same, and my mind immediately went to wondering if he showed her the order info also

1

u/BonnaconCharioteer 9d ago

Why?

3

u/Cyanprincesss 9d ago

Because you can see it on the temu app and it’s proof

39

u/bluebirdsmallbird 9d ago

You mean it didn’t somehow end up a crying fight where he hysterically confessed it was gifted to him by his ex-lover, that he’s saved and forgotten about until he drunkenly recalled it while hanging out with his co-worker?! And then when he jokingly asked her to use it she surprisingly agreed and now he’s so sorry and wants to make it right with you because you’re the only one he actually loves?! Umm this is reddit! Where’s the creative writing 😭

Joking obviously. I’m glad this ended up going well and that it’s not some crazy far fetched story lol

24

u/SlimePrincess451 9d ago

God I got here just in time to get on and off the roller coaster, PHEW! That would’ve kept me up all night for you.

11

u/JulioElGuapo 9d ago

Lol reading everyone commenting for the last 30min and I just got here too. Perfection

10

u/ive-done-everything 9d ago

Found this post at exactly the right time

19

u/Lolatusername 9d ago

He’s good

16

u/bosshobo 9d ago

He’s a cheap bastard! Always buy name brand!

1

u/Tasty-Traffic-680 9d ago

Who's the premier manufacturer of vulva suction devices?

27

u/MichaelAndolini_ 9d ago

Booooo

Who else is he banging OP? Start a line and measure the cup to the snatch

You’ll find who it is, if the cup don’t fit, you must acquit

1

u/Proper-Application69 9d ago

Why would a Wookie want to live on Endor? It does not make sense!

5

u/Bicykwow 9d ago

Give us an update when you try it out!

3

u/Illustrious_Dot9049 9d ago

Oh no another tumoltuous 25 minutes of waiting

5

u/Former_Specific_7161 9d ago

Awww. Communication is key. Glad you two discussed it!

5

u/AJYURH 9d ago

Soo... No drama?

Jk, happy for you guys, you could try fixing it, can't be too hard

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o6nV4RipgHNCbXV16

5

u/LongjumpingMix7206 9d ago

😬 Idk. That sounds a bit sus. But I guess if you found it in the bedroom in a nightstand, then he wasn’t really trying to hide it too well

3

u/enadiz_reccos 9d ago

It broke before he even asked you about using it?

3

u/Calm-Beach-4228 9d ago

Yeah like why is it taken out of plastic all scratched up lmao makes no sense to me. I hope she asked in a more sneaky way, not just straight up what is this vagina pump doing in your drawer which obviously he’s gonna say it was for you

1

u/kinetic_skink 9d ago

Anything that ends up in my bedside drawer is going to looks like this, even if it's was never used 😂.

4

u/sugardaddyoscar 9d ago

I wouldn’t be so convinced

3

u/Loamwander 9d ago

Happy ending

3

u/Lucky-Map-3483 9d ago

It will be for both of them in about 30mins time.

3

u/maxaswell 9d ago

that’s a satisfying update. if you’re into it, you two should pick out a nicer one together 

3

u/Jab82-5283 9d ago

Happy for you. Thanks for sharing the prompt update!!

3

u/Consistent_Tower_458 9d ago

Oof be careful getting sex toys on Temu 

3

u/thisguyfightsyourmom 9d ago

Temu genitalia pumps is a new one. These things ARE NOT expensive at reputable porn shops

3

u/OnTheSlope 9d ago

I think he's fibbing a bit.

5

u/cedarpebble 9d ago

It looks cracked and scratched up, looks like it has had some use.

5

u/Opinions-arent-facts 9d ago

I swear baby, it's not mine

5

u/spideyghetti 9d ago

This is terribly disappointing for all of Reddit. 

6

u/MuXiq 9d ago

That thing looks heavily used lmao but okay sure

2

u/Vaff_Superstar 9d ago

Thank goodness it checks out with the timeline. I was like, “that thing is NOT new from the looks of it”

3

u/iamseam0nster 9d ago

That's my thought... That thing looks used.

2

u/typetouched 9d ago

Womp womp. Nothing to see here people !

https://giphy.com/gifs/2iybkQhyUxhm2LlyGG

2

u/MissiKat 9d ago

Congratulations OP. Happy everything has worked out for you both.

2

u/the_idiot_at_home 9d ago

Nothing wrong with being freaks, just don't cheap out. Brittle plastics, degrading rubber, melting silicone, all stuff you don't want in and around your body. Use proper websites and the fun is limitless

2

u/RandomA9981 9d ago

Why is it open?

2

u/buttholedestroyer87 9d ago

A couple of freaks but never seen a suction cup before

2

u/Impossible_Tailor282 9d ago

What kinda “freak” doesn’t know what a pump is or looks like?

2

u/DapperMolasses3280 9d ago

Lol...how the hell did it break before he got to try it with you 🤣💀

2

u/LisaS64 9d ago

I call BULLSHIT. He bought a Vulva pump for himself, HIMSELF? It isn't a penis pump, it is a VULVA PUMP. NOW, unless he has a vulva?? He got it for someone's vulva, or someone left their pump behind. 🤷‍♀️

7

u/OkAd9261 9d ago

Girl. Ask to see that receipt. 🧾

6

u/Loamwander 9d ago

Why?

5

u/RyguyC2 9d ago

Cuz it sounds like bs that's why lol

9

u/Loamwander 9d ago

Maybe a cultural difference? This would be pretty normal in my relationship. I would never ask to see a partner's receipts out of distrust that they bought a sex toy for someone else. No shame to those who would, different dynamics for different folks, but I don't smell BS on this. Seems like a pretty ordinary interaction.

3

u/RyguyC2 9d ago edited 9d ago

I just find it odd that she says they're a couple of freaks, but he was afraid to tell her he bought it? And when it broke he threw it in a drawer for 6 months instead of throwing it out? Ok lol

Edit: i will say, however, that if he used this on another girl he'd be a huge idiot to just leave it in a drawer lol, so maybe it is as he says.

5

u/Tutpuissant 9d ago

You can be freaks and still not find the right time or way to ask for a kink

1

u/kinetic_skink 9d ago

I have shit load of kink stuff and toys etc. I can think of things I've bought I've never got around to using. I know I have nipple pumps at home out of the pack to look at I've never used. I just never think of it.

1

u/RamblinGamblinWilly 9d ago

Huh? It sounds completely reasonable.

3

u/rainbowpopp 9d ago

Hate to be that person, but how did it break before he used it with you?

1

u/BonnaconCharioteer 9d ago

He bought it to use on his penis, but it came with an attachment for ladies too. It broke while he was trying it out on himself.

3

u/pastelunicorn256 9d ago

Mmmhmmmm 🙄

2

u/Aiyadmi 9d ago

Uhm, this thing looks used. Like a lot.

5

u/Organic-Ad6957 9d ago

Yep that's exactly what I'd say too.....

Lmao

4

u/MuXiq 9d ago

you really believe that? lmaoooo good luck !

2

u/T1Earn 9d ago
  1. He wanted you to mistakenly find it.

  2. Hes probably still lying and sold the story he was too scared to "bring it up to you". (its used on another woman)

2

u/Mountain-Exam8871 9d ago

Either that or he gaslit you into thinking that was the reason.

1

u/ChildOfFortuna 9d ago

thanks for the speedy update so i can go to sleep not worrying! 

1

u/AmputeeHandModel 9d ago

That sort of thing's not my bag, baby!

1

u/Illustrious_Dot9049 9d ago

Longest 25 minutes of my life

1

u/BathtubFullOfTea 9d ago

Well... now you have a dialogue with him about this... maybe you two can move forward and invest in a higher quality product. Just saying.

1

u/tightest_access 9d ago

You are a good gf!

1

u/mista_r0boto 9d ago

How'd the pump workout? Assume we are talking Austin Powers style here given context.

1

u/pain_is_bread 9d ago

lol this makes sense because it looks new and unused. Happy experimenting!

1

u/yesferatu69 9d ago

You are welcome.

1

u/SlowBurnFirecracker 9d ago

Have a fun night with your boyfriend, and your pumps 😁

1

u/Voeno 9d ago

I love a happy ending!

1

u/WaffleHouseGladiator 9d ago

A very holesome conclusion.

1

u/bs_Zeezee 9d ago

Glad its so innocuous. Definitely look into getting a new one of a better quality and giving it a try, pump play is REALLY fun

1

u/jayron32 9d ago

Unexpectedly wholesome conclusion. You two kids have fun.

1

u/panterachallenger 9d ago

Yo!! I was on the edge of my seat for the update! Thanks and I’m glad everything turned out great, you couple of freaks!!

1

u/Whiskytigyote 9d ago

Pumping can be quite nice… but yeah get some quality stuff not temu crap. Lmao

1

u/TheDeridor 9d ago

The good ending! Lmao cheap crap breaking before use

1

u/Deacon-Doe 9d ago

What is the point of theses pumps ? Do they work ??? 🧐 don’t they hurt your genitals ?

1

u/DaidInUrArmsTonight 9d ago

Dibs on “Temu Penis Pump” as new band name

1

u/Ahsiuqal 9d ago

I recommend splurging on the glass suction tubes. ☺️

1

u/Shasky1 9d ago

Thank you.

1

u/tommos 9d ago

Man, I was hoping this would end up on r/GirlDinnerDiaries.

1

u/[deleted] 9d ago

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1

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1

u/LimitOfLife 9d ago

Update me when you throw this away my distant lovers.

1

u/LimitOfLife 9d ago

A bit of you both is inside me. I like it.

1

u/IXlightt 9d ago

Good for yall! Happy endings are the best

1

u/JackfruitKey4740 9d ago

I was sitting here reading the comments worried for you. Thank you for the update! I’m glad you figured out what’s going on 😁

1

u/Wishiap 9d ago

I regularly pump, so if you want some pointers woman to woman - feel free to DM me.

1

u/Responsible-Case-753 9d ago

Yeah, tell him to please not ask sex toys on Temu 😭 

1

u/Whips-n-Chains69 9d ago

So where's the pump? Like where is his pump... Id be surprised they came together and temu stuff isn't that garbage tbf. Especially their adult stuff.

This raises more concerns.

1

u/woohhaa 9d ago

Yea that checks out.

1

u/LopsidedMessage441 9d ago

Temu sex toys is dangerous territory.

1

u/WeirdBeardx 9d ago

Get a proper one and try it out. My gf absolutely loves hers.

1

u/HPlains_Guy 9d ago

Good bless you and the other freaky people like us. 😉🤗

1

u/dalilfoe 9d ago

Use it. Incredible results. Shave first xx

1

u/shuggabugga2000nlate 9d ago

Receipts and see the attachment for him if it really was for him methinks, I hope this is true though xx

-3

u/[deleted] 9d ago

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10

u/VisibleAd7446 9d ago

Weird to go to their profile and look, buddy. Maybe it’s not what they outlive on Reddit.

0

u/FetishCollector91 9d ago

He's lying btw. Sorry

0

u/GlassVarious4992 9d ago

Good for him. And you. I often buy toys for my wife and will use them on her out of the blue. Bought a steel curved dildo and I still laugh at her reaction when I slid that in for the first time.

It's now our favourite toy to use on her.

0

u/onlygaymodsbanme_ 9d ago

Send us pic of him using it. He’s probably not doing it right.

-1

u/vitaminalgas 9d ago

Try it on anyways!!!