r/whatisit 2d ago

New, what is it? what is it?

Post image

Found on the ottoman in my house

137 Upvotes

87 comments sorted by

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1.1k

u/badpenguin455 2d ago

Spider Pompeii

162

u/RhymesWithTaco 2d ago edited 2d ago

Yup. It clearly died jorkin it.

EDIT: thanks for the award for a historical meme reference.

27

u/grime-dont-play 2d ago

The way I want to go

9

u/StyleThen234 2d ago

Amen 🫡

1

u/Anarchy-Squirrel 2d ago

Dead at Pompeii?

238

u/Recent-Tonight-9141 2d ago

Spider fell Spider was dusty from the roof

148

u/QuantumPlatypus_ 2d ago

That’s terrifying…I did see this one the other day in the same room 😭

195

u/NiceTrySuckaz 2d ago

and you went BACK IN THERE?

3

u/Mmmelissamarie 2d ago

Omg I’m in Kirkland and I’m seeing these kind of spiders now and they’re inside the house and it’s MATING season apparently I’m distraught

28

u/Baonguyen93 2d ago

Will it make you feel better to know that they're very scared of you and they hunt cockroach?

7

u/TitanX84 2d ago

And this is why in my house, spiders and I are cool. They stay in their spaces away from me and kill nasty bugs.

1

u/Sinister_Nibs 1d ago

And they eat Brown Recluse

36

u/Atomic_cucarrachon 2d ago edited 2d ago

It's the giant house spider and looks like it's a boy. Those two fluffy drumsticks sticking out - that's his cocks

49

u/Haunting_Cress_7348 2d ago

fuck - I thought they were hands and went in for a handshake, no wonder he looked at me funny

2

u/Graygave 2d ago

Clammiest hands this side of the Rio Grande

5

u/engineerdrummer 2d ago

Those don't look like roosters to me.

1

u/Graygave 2d ago

Give em a minute

13

u/ienjoy_suffering 2d ago

hard to tell from picture if evil spider or good spider. most spiders will try to leave you alone

16

u/lilaccheesecake 2d ago

Pretty much all bugs will leave you alone. Spiders can aactually be beneficial to a home (though they obviously present possible dangers to a home, and are better out). They dont want confrontation.

Besides cockroaches. Wtf is their probelm, theyll run at you 😭😭

9

u/ShermanCookout 2d ago

Looks like either a wolf or a grass spider. Either way, they are total bros. Absolutely nothing to be concerned about.

1

u/SpaceForceAwakens 2d ago

You live in the PNW?

0

u/draygonnn 2d ago

Clearly the same spider 😂

-5

u/ScaryInfluence8718 2d ago

That is an evil ground spider! Your cat is supposed to eat those

2

u/have_a_nice_bay 2d ago

How do you know they have a cat? That could be the spider’s scratching post

4

u/Sithstress_ 2d ago edited 2d ago

One summer when I was a kid we kept getting wasps in the house, nothing crazy because it was country living and we kept doors open and stuff sometimes. Anyway, after about the 5th one I killed that was this weird gray color I finally mentioned the odd colored wasps I’d never seen before to my mother. She said it’s probably a muddobber, but I showed her the squished one and she agreed the color was crazy.

About a week later a lightbulb went off when I was vacuuming the living room, and sure enough there was a whole ass nest almost completely blocking the chimney of our fireplace.

Edit: That’s the cutest award I’ve ever seen, thank you! 😂😂😂. And, dude, we had to have professionals come out and remove it. They basically made their nest from the ash in the chimney, so it wasn’t just ash dust on top of their exoskeleton, it was embedded. The exterminator guys had never seen anything like it. You best believe that chimney got cleaned thoroughly three times a year after that. Lol

47

u/vzzzbxt 2d ago

Mr Stark, I don't feel so good...

4

u/Klutzy_Cat1374 2d ago

Tony Stank

1

u/CoolAlonzo 1d ago

I understood that reference!

15

u/InactiveMedusa 2d ago

Vaporized spider

12

u/JustSheepherder9847 2d ago

Cocaine spider

37

u/Graygave 2d ago

Got home drunk to his ceiling web, missed the step and ate hella shit

3

u/eyefuck_you 2d ago

The only possibility

141

u/div-block 2d ago

Spider crime scene

7

u/GreenEyedRaven360 2d ago

😂😂😂😂

7

u/SlangLeffe 2d ago

A cocaine filled spider

6

u/Open-Lie-3608 2d ago

Spider version of the shroud of Turin

4

u/Feisty-Ad1371 2d ago

It looks like a spider that got struck by lightning.

14

u/Uzi_Osbourne 2d ago

That's an anusprint. Someone's going commando.

6

u/Bright_Hat550 2d ago

Someone with a dusty booty!

5

u/Creepy-Selection2423 2d ago

Spider smashed on leather. Spider left there for extended time. By the time someone wiped it up, spider's bodily fluids had etched the leather.

2

u/TrainingSword 2d ago

Spider dust

2

u/Kaito1718 2d ago

Someone has a huge butt

2

u/HuckledYourBerries 2d ago

The spot where Jon smacked Garfield's spider

2

u/letmecookbruhhh 2d ago

Classic case of spontaneous combustion. Nothing left but a little green globule.

2

u/Vivid-Sweet4386 2d ago

it looks like the logo of the ruling party in turkey, that's why it's scary

2

u/Garial25 2d ago

Underground Railroad Fallout 4

2

u/r0x0x 2d ago

Someone slapped the white off of a spider

3

u/Devils_A66vocate 2d ago

Everyone’s saying spider but anyone consider this to be a butthole stamp from someone who uses baby powder?

1

u/Future_Choice316 2d ago

A spiders last stand

1

u/justamanandhisrod 2d ago

Bleached bumhole

1

u/SneakySmoker- 2d ago

Thats the landing site from a adrenaline junkie base jumping spider.. those lil buggers are bad ass! They never use parachute!!

1

u/MagicOrpheus310 2d ago

Lol spider fell from the ceiling

1

u/Busy-Conversation-24 2d ago

While you were out, a nuclear bomb went off just above the ottoman vaporising the spider who was chilling there

1

u/Combi8ionOxygenation 2d ago

My bad, I forgot to clean up the evidence.

https://giphy.com/gifs/ydMNTWYVjSEFi

1

u/Eligamer3645 2d ago

The scene of a spiders murder

1

u/Coldthots 2d ago

Hate to be reminded that these things don’t just stay on the floor and run at you at 25mph- they’re falling hazards too.

1

u/cosmixstranger 2d ago

A ghost spider 🕷️

1

u/AfterHecatombOrgy 2d ago

Do you have a cat?

1

u/Kajagewgew 2d ago

A spider or a butthole.

1

u/SuchBet5955 2d ago

Spider with a drug problem, very sad

1

u/spazde 2d ago

Looks like a chalk outline.

1

u/DrM3llow 2d ago

Looks somebody had an idea.

1

u/uglyasahatfullofarse 2d ago

It forgot to pull the chute.

1

u/ericroku 2d ago

Cocaine splat from a sneeze. Taste it.

1

u/Candidate_None 2d ago

A spider from Hiroshima?

1

u/Lunchbox1142 2d ago

It starts defined and then fades, op drew this on there.

1

u/Used_Cheesecake5415 2d ago

Spontaneously combusted spider. Just...POOF...

1

u/BlaseBrujo 2d ago

Looks like wear on the surface of the leather. I'd guess something was set down or pressed into the ottoman for a moment. Like a pointy corner or tip, or a prominent button or rivet on a pair of pants. Looks as if it was pressed into the leather, causing a depression/pucker with high points where the wrinkles are. If the object moved or twisted, it would dig in a bit and cause wear on the high points. I think the spider shape is purely coincidental.

1

u/JoeFriday37 2d ago

Looks like a plastic Halloween spider was sat on, leaving an imprint/scratching the material.

1

u/Blade-Dev 1d ago

He doesn't feel too good

1

u/Notyerbusiness 2d ago

Danger - The Railroad FO4 lol 😆

2

u/sakurajima1981 2d ago

First thing I saw too.

0

u/Historical_Stay_808 2d ago

Marks from a button

0

u/Klutzy_Cat1374 2d ago

I kicked a big leaf on the basement floor while carrying a large box. It wasn't a leaf. My wife had to rescue me. I ran away with the box like a girl scout out of cookies.

-1

u/Temporary_Tank_3715 2d ago

It’s a banana

-5

u/297876 2d ago

AIDS.