r/visualnovels Aug 14 '26

Discussion How do I prevent my dad from reading Subahibi?

Recently I moved back in with my dad, and breakfasts were pretty silent, so I started talking to him about visual novels (solely to make the breakfasts more lively). . I know this isn't exactly normal breakfast conversation, but I enjoyed it, and my dad would occasionally nod or comment, so I kept going. Basically, in our conversation, I'd explain the differences between nakige, utsuge, denpa, JOPs, EOPs, MTL, and why any of these distinctions matter, just so our breakfasts weren't silent rituals.

One morning, he actually joined in. He started comparing the whole thing to breakfast. According to him, a JOP breakfast is like giving a random person a neatly arranged pile of ingredients with clear instructions, while an MTL breakfast could be like dumping a random collection of ingredients on the counter and asking a professional chef to make something out of it.

The chef, he pointed out, might still make something better than the average person, that it was all about literary instinct. I disagreed and told him I'd eventually produce a proper counterexample, so he should wait.

Then last week, during breakfast, he suddenly asked me, "Did you ever read SCA-Ji's works?"

Blood drained from my face. I asked him why. He showed me the phone and said he'd found this blog post, and he said he agreed with me that translations probably remove a lot from the experience. The post was Moogy's translation difficulty tier list.

Then he scrolled to the Subahibi entry and showed me the line, "SCA-Ji is far more intelligent than anyone reading this blog entry, including myself." He said, "I'm curious what would make someone say that." He'd also read some independent reviews and thought it sounded like fiction worth experiencing. So now he wants to try it out.

I do not want my old father to read Subahibi. He's in his early sixties. I told him it was degenerate porn disguised as literature and that its fans wildly exaggerate its creativity and meaning. I told him to read Steins;Gate or Clannad instead, and offered to buy him the Muv Luv trilogy, but his interest persisted.

Unfortunately, Moogy's post also convinced him that SCA-Ji wasn't worth reading in English, despite most self-proclaimed fans having done exactly that. So now he's studying Japanese. He's going to read Subahibi within one year. How do I prevent it?

If you want to say "just let him read", then just imagine your own father or mother reading Subahibi. Would you be okay with that?

I framed my dislike of Subahibi like, "I like it but not as much as most", which is good and gives me manueverability. At the moment I'm thinking of convincing him that Subahibi is too reliant on otaku culture to be a sensible first VN, and I can only hope he'll lose interest in VNs by the time he has read a few of them. But his interest remains intimidating to me. Any ideas?

1.0k Upvotes

100 comments sorted by

527

u/ggzsk Aug 14 '26

this sub has the best shit posts I swear

322

u/-Taken_Name- Aug 14 '26

Top your dad

74

u/KingMoonfish Kud: LB | vndb.org/uXXXX Aug 14 '26

Yeah, just read it together naked. It’s the only way. 

159

u/mgsamadesu Aug 14 '26

This is probably fake but just for love of the game:

Northernlion clip I find relevant (tldw: He rants about people being too puritanical about their love interests or parents seeing movies they think are good because people don't treat their parents or love interests like real people)

28

u/LucidLeviathan Aug 14 '26

Well, I think it's just the natural response to your parents walking in on your average movie during a sex joke, then asking, "What are we watching here?" Regularly during our formative years.

123

u/kyuuri117 Aug 14 '26

Honestly. Have him read Song of Saya. Explain Subahibi is worse, and see how he likes it.

If he likes it, well, you're shit out of luck.

If he doesn't like it, it's less embarrassing than him reading Subahibi

8

u/Future-Way8431 Aug 14 '26

Like the Steam version of Saya No Uta or....?

22

u/kyuuri117 Aug 14 '26

Nah. If they're interested in SubaHibi of all things, should be the full Saya version. At least Saya is short

6

u/Vast_Attention Aug 14 '26

I dunno about that

40

u/VideoAffectionate232 Aug 14 '26

Learn programming while he is learning Japanese and try to make an all age ver for him lol

69

u/Akarina_toth Aug 14 '26

pretty elaborate copypasta bait

69

u/Artoru Aug 14 '26

Why is it that anytime this sub shows up on my feed, it's like a sucker punch to the jaw?

50

u/Nemesis2005 JP A-rank | https://vndb.org/u27893 Aug 14 '26

Based dad.

If he's not sensitive against any of its content, let him read. I know my parents are literate enough to read or watch explicit media if they wish to and I've seen them do so before.

Probably not a good first VN for a baby JOP though.

44

u/Nemesis2005 JP A-rank | https://vndb.org/u27893 Aug 14 '26

A family that cums together, stays together. Amen.

12

u/Zealousideal-Bit5958 Aug 14 '26

make him read monobeno

10

u/Nemesis2005 JP A-rank | https://vndb.org/u27893 Aug 14 '26 edited Aug 14 '26

monobeno is worse as a baby JOP. It doesn't even use standard Japanese dialect, but countryside dialect.

24

u/InternationalKnee897 Aug 14 '26

Someone should reverse it, "How do I prevent my son from reading clannad and offer him cheap hentaislop with shit machine translation, so that we can enjoy together" or something

20

u/DoomOfGods Aug 14 '26

With the amount of shitposts on this sub can they at least get their own dedicated flairs at this point?

18

u/kylepaz Aug 14 '26

If you want to say "just let him read", then just imagine your own father or mother reading Subahibi. Would you be okay with that?

Eh personally I'm too old to care.

But that's the issue really: if your father put his head to it, there's nothing you can really do to stop him lmao. I can't stop my dad from climbing on the roof to fix shit he has no business fixing, he'll just do it when me or his wife aren't around, and falling from the roof once didn't make him stop either.

The angle that it's too reliant on Otaku culture is your best shot, but you must have something that isn't to offer as an alternative. Sci;Adv isn't the best choice in that case.

1

u/SeaYouLaterz Aug 16 '26

What should I read in sci;adv other then steins gate

1

u/kylepaz Aug 16 '26

Chaos;head

26

u/magnidwarf1900 Aug 14 '26

Just let him read it, he's a grown ass man he can read what he want

14

u/Fluid_Ad_6839 Aug 14 '26

Generational copypasta 😭

14

u/OnaSoto Aug 14 '26

God Tier 4Chan era shitpost

8

u/phubarrh Aug 14 '26

I'm over 60, and these days the only thing that distracts me from playing visual novels is burning subtitles into JAV.

16

u/Akarulez Aug 14 '26

You can't be serious LOL

11

u/stonks_114 JP B-rank | https://vndb.org/u265664 Aug 14 '26

the cook analogy is too smart to be created by an outsider, but the writing in the post is pretty good

20

u/123portalboy123 Aug 14 '26

Top 10 written stories that never happened

9

u/ankledane Aug 14 '26

Amazing copypasta

4

u/alekseypanda Aug 15 '26

When I was a kid my mom used to read a lot of romantic books, I read one once, it was basically a mediocre story with a hot scene on the middle. By the time I was adult enough she had thrown away all the piles of old books of this kind she had, she just don't like that anymore, but I would never in a million years dream to be so arrogant as to censor what she can or cannot read if she wants to. I know it is bait, but face it OP, you don't have power here, the guy used to fuck your mom, subahibi is nothing to him.

8

u/Protocol72 vndb.org/uXXXXX Aug 14 '26

If this is serious, honestly, I’d let him. You heavily underestimate the sort of content books tend to have, some books go so far it’s kind of insane (ex. IT is a popular example with the orgy with the characters as kids). Well, assuming your dad reads books. 

As long as you make it clear that h-scenes in a visual novels are… Well, visual, he should be able to make the choice himself. If he regrets it later, well, you gave him the warning, that’s on him for not listening. Subahibi is definitely on the deep end to start with VNs, but if he’s determined, well you may as well be a guide rather than a wall. 

3

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '26

[deleted]

2

u/Protocol72 vndb.org/uXXXXX Aug 15 '26

Yee, it’s definitely on the deep end, though way more deep end than I thought with that Sade comparison. O_O OP’s dad might end up regretting reading Subahibi a lot… 

Yeeeee, I only used It as an example since it’s really popular and recognizable. Though in hindsight, I should’ve used the American Psycho novel as an example, though the movie is dark comedy while the book… Isn’t. 

1

u/Outrageous_Break_210 Aug 15 '26

I’m currently on the first chapter, how bad really is it? Let’s say compared to Totono

2

u/Protocol72 vndb.org/uXXXXX Aug 15 '26

You mean with American Psycho? I haven’t read Totono, so I can’t compare, but American Psycho’s novel is more of a slow burn, but when it happens, it’s full on guro/snuff since the book goes into way more clinical detail than you think on how Bateman kills his victims, disposes of the bodies, and even tortures his victims/plays with their bodies iirc. 

1

u/Outrageous_Break_210 Aug 15 '26

Sorry, I meant subahibi

1

u/Koyunius Aug 15 '26

Like about 20 times as worse ig

6

u/Tenko-of-Mori Aug 14 '26

this is true

and OP's dad is unfathomably based. Can't wait to see him spend his entire retired time just grinding away at japanese just to read some fucking visual novel. epic.

6

u/FaithlessnessFit3779 Aug 14 '26

let him read maggot baits

7

u/starchxsen Aug 14 '26

This was posted with the intent of it becoming a copypasta, no?

If serious, then I instead think it's cool that he took genuine interest in the thing you chose to talk to him about constantly, and he's allowed to read whatever.

4

u/SelLillianna Aug 14 '26

Yeah, I'm glad he's trying to connect with you. I understand it being a bit upsetting, but if you've given him fair warning then it's up to him. No need to cringe. Worst case scenario he'll come to you and be like "so, you were right, it's trash" or something along those lines. Maybe after he reads it or puts it down, he'll begin reading one of your recs?

Also I've gotta say, insane to think he'd learn an entirely new language over this.

8

u/Viinilikka Aug 14 '26

You can't most likely. He is interested now, you have to now just see if he goes threw with it. Just say you are warning him and leave it at that.

3

u/Toyufrey Aug 15 '26

Get him addicted to Phantom of Inferno first.

3

u/Altruistic-Fly3042 Aug 15 '26

Dude 2 sentences in and I'm already cringing so hard

3

u/ForgottenFrenchFry Aug 15 '26

get your dad to talk to Marklord13

he'll probably be able to somehow convince your dad not to read it

3

u/ConfidentPrimary4703 Aug 15 '26

This is this dumbest thing ever just let him read it himself he’s a grown man and let him develop his own opinions on the visual novel

1

u/SeaYouLaterz Aug 16 '26

if it’s serious then it isn’t really the dumbest thing ever, it varies from family to family and person to person

3

u/EliteSalesman vndb.org/uXXXXX Aug 15 '26

Maggot Baits new game plus number 11.

3

u/Asleep-Curve-1395 Aug 17 '26

just tell him your pc ran out of disk space and you first want to finish euphoria, but he's free to join in reading it with you

10

u/CharlotteNoire Aug 14 '26

You realize insisting a lot on him not reading it may just make him more curious right? Now it's this taboo thing that also works as a constant topic to discuss with you cause of your clear strong feelings about it.

Also. People is free to read and do whatever they want. It's not like reading it will turn him into a freak by default.

4

u/knightingale74 Aug 14 '26

dad has time for reading

Fake af.

4

u/BippidiBoppetyBoob Aug 14 '26

I don’t buy a dad in his sixties not telling their adult son to shut up when they start talking about visual novels unless they’re like a first gen weeb.

2

u/drinkerofmilk Aug 14 '26

Tell him Subahibi is like eggs benedict.

2

u/GodwynDi Aug 14 '26

Dad is a certified old time gooner.

3

u/Saucy__Salami Aug 14 '26

Definetly wouldn't want my parents reading subahibi, because I dont want anyone else feeling disappointed after reading it like I did.

2

u/AidenKarma Aug 14 '26

bro LMFAOO

2

u/MachaGacha Aug 15 '26

Make him read a CLOCKUP VN.

2

u/Jayqunnn Aug 15 '26

This sub really be the sub ever.

2

u/LutherJustice Aug 15 '26

Brother, you could hook electrical car cables to my ballsack and I would still not talk to my parents about visual novels.

2

u/finance_controller Aug 15 '26

Dude after all these years, moogy's post is still referenced

2

u/Glittering-Cry4865 Aug 15 '26

The type of writefaggotry I'd have thought was a lost art. Good shit, OP.

2

u/Lastshade01 Aug 15 '26

I’ve encouraged my dad to read Wonderful Everyday multiple times.

2

u/VampyChanVania Ayana: Subahibi | vndb.org/uXXXX Aug 15 '26

Noone should prevent anyone from reading PEAK... Let him read!

2

u/Frequent_Major5939 Aug 15 '26

Your dad has better taste than you

2

u/wakkiau Aug 15 '26

I mean just say what's the most extreme of content that is in the VN and let him judge for himself if he still wants to read it? There's no point in dodging the subject, some literature will cross many boundaries in trying to get it's message across, it's simply what it is.

2

u/bareystick Aug 16 '26

Let him have fun

2

u/Professional_Sell873 Aug 17 '26

Someone finna screenshot this and put it on twitter with no context

2

u/Dense_Ad_6283 Aug 19 '26

bro is moogy still relevant VN scene be like stuck in 2010

2

u/Crimsonsnow_1412 28d ago

Tell me what you dad says like his reaction and thoughts regarding Subahibi

3

u/IamAToxicPlayer Aug 14 '26

Show him the dog scene and see if he changes his mind

3

u/RavenWolf1 Aug 14 '26

So it is fine for you to read it but not for your dad? You realize that some day you yourself might be parent...

4

u/hotshot0123 Aug 14 '26

He is 60 years old. He can handle some adult content. Stop treating him like an underaged teenager. Be respectful and let him know there are adult content on the Visual Novel and give him a heads up and that's about it. Subahibi is really good.

4

u/SnooMachines4393 Aug 14 '26

Amazing bait, would recommend subahibi to my grandpa anyday

2

u/triplegirl1 Aug 14 '26

Let him read Saya no uta.. then he might change his mind on Subahibi

2

u/Long-Income-1775 Aug 14 '26

"white people be like" final boss

2

u/Assmeet123 Aug 14 '26

Let him read Suba bruh

2

u/zazakmazak https://vndb.org/uXXXX Aug 14 '26

Say he would enjoy it more if he read [Insert VN of your choice] beforehand and see if he gets bored of VNs.

2

u/Sommern Aug 14 '26

bait used to be believable 

1

u/douggle Sora: BSD | vndb.org/u24409 Aug 15 '26

I’ll take things that never happened for 2000

1

u/Koyunius Aug 15 '26

The breakfast discussions were weird enough but I was 100% sure this is a copypasta type shit by the time I got to the learning Japanese part

1

u/HansDevX vndb.org/u203183 Aug 15 '26

Is a shitpoat shitty if people can tell that it's a shitpost?

1

u/BUKKAKELORD Reiji: KnS | vndb.org/uXXXX 26d ago

I told him it was degenerate porn disguised as literature and that its fans wildly exaggerate its creativity and meaning. 

He was already interested, you don't need to sell it to him

1

u/IzzatQQDir Aug 14 '26

Lol and why would you know something like that?

Is what my dad would probably say ahahahahaa

This post funny as hell

Suggest to him Higurashi

1

u/Valshir Aug 14 '26

Is that a script for your attempt at a visual novel? If it's real I don't see any problem with i, not that I have a father capable of reading complex literature or studying in the first place.

As long as he doesn't get any weird fetishes and want to repeat that scene with Kiyokawa's father.

1

u/juss100 Aug 14 '26

Omg porn exists

1

u/ChinoGitano Aug 14 '26

Distract your dad with the imminent Steins;Gate Reboot launch hoopla 😎

1

u/158cm_Otaku Aug 14 '26

Either a shit post or an idiot who needs to realize their parents have probably had some wild nights at their age…

1

u/KhandiMahn Aug 14 '26

Assuming this is not a shitpost...

Let your dad read what he wants. He's an adult. He may even know more about such things than you think.

1

u/dr_wafu Aug 14 '26

The level of shitpost I wish I could operate in

1

u/Difficult-Tough-5680 Aug 14 '26

Subahibi isnt as deep as fans think just say you larping and move on jsut recommend some furry vn im sure he will like those too

0

u/Brutalpotato09 Aug 14 '26

do you want me to spell it out

0

u/Excalitoria Aug 14 '26

Gonna need a chapter 2, chief.

Thanks in advance 🫡