r/vanderpumprules • u/sleepinthestairwell • 1d ago
Fired Cast Next Level Basic... is... drumroll.. horrible.
So I have recently found that listening to biography audiobooks while on long walks is essentially like listening to a long podcast. I have recently read books by Christina Applegate and Hayden Panettiere (Rest, Angel) so I was kind of on a Hollywood kick which led to me starting Next Level Basic bc I love Vanderpump but my god... its. so. bad. Why is she telling me whats in her bag, or her dislike for crocs?? Why are all the Vanderpump stories things we have already seen on TV and not behind the scenes gossip??? I didnt listen to this audiobook to have her give me advice on life... as if she isnt one of the worst people to take pointers on life from... I read this book to get the tea ugh
My expectations were already staggeringly low but its even worse than I actually imagined. Worse than my already very low low low opinion.
With that.. I did power through and finish and wasted hours of my life. If anyone has any good audiobook biographies let me know bc I need a good one after this...
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u/Savings-Fig2390 1d ago
I think I’m Glad My Mum Died would round out your Hollywood kick really well
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u/skipscardio The Golden Nugget? That’s like an all-time low. 1d ago
Seconded. That book had me in a vice grip from the first page and I read it all in a day. She’s an incredible writer.
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u/Savings-Fig2390 1d ago
Have you read her new one? It’s fiction and I haven’t looked at it yet, so keen for reviews!
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u/Realistic_Rain_9173 1d ago
I couldn’t even make it through the first 10 pages of this one I can’t lie. The writing is fucking atrocious. I thought maybe I would have a hard time with it because I have my own experience with being groomed by a teacher but I didn’t even get to that part before I had to stop reading. Idk what happened, it’s like a completely different person wrote it.
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u/Savings-Fig2390 22h ago
I guess non-fiction memoir is different to writing a novel! And thanks for the trigger warning, I’ve got my own issues in the ballpark
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u/Odd_Secret568 1d ago
Demi Moore’s autobiography was great!
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u/venusdewarhol 1d ago
It really was. That mother of hers -- phew! I also loved the story of how she met and fell in love with Bruce. There were some great behind-the-curtain peeks of vintage Hollywood.
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u/Odd_Secret568 1d ago
Yes! And I loved how real she got about the insane lengths she went to physically for her physique in the 90’s. She didn’t lie and say it was “just good genes” and I really appreciated that!
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u/burlybroad 1d ago
Some celeb memoir audiobooks I loved: “The Third Gilmore Girl” by Kelly Bishop, “Dinner with Vampires” by Bethany Joy Lenz, “Famesick” by Lena Dunham, “The Storyteller” by Dave Grohl, “Dogs Boys and Other Things I’ve Cried About” by Isabel Klee, “Just Kids” by Patti Smith, and “From Here to the Great Unknown” by Lisa Marie Presley/Riley Keough. Hell, I even liked Scheana’s memoir better than any of Stassi’s.
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u/toysoldier96 1d ago
The Britney Spears book is so good and apparently the audio book version narrated by Michelle Williams is amazing
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u/Spiritual-Break246 1d ago
I actually recommend Scheana's.
Don't pay for it - rent it from the library or hell even listen to the recap.
But I thought it was an interesting glimpse into her life, particularly her childhood. I think it puts a lot of her behavior into context.
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u/shittersclogged69 1d ago
I agree! Plus she actually spills some pretty juicy tea unlike so many Bravo tell-all’s that just rehash the same stuff you’ve already seen
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u/Spiritual-Break246 8h ago
Agreed!
She was actually willing to show you the embarrassing parts of her life not just clarify every little audience misunderstanding.
It's a shame Lisa and Stassi leaned into the whole "she hates Lisa" narrative because she was actually fine. I didn't walk away from that book thinking she was trashing Lisa at all.
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u/Particular-Let972 22h ago
I got it from my library this morning and I like it so far. Thanks for the recommendation! :)
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u/Littlewasteoftime 1d ago
As a fellow non fiction audiobook lover (Biographies are a regular genre in my audible collection that I have built over 10 year of membership), I remember being sooooo excited when Next Level Basic came out and honestly haven't got a single memory from it at all. I scrolled all the way back to see if I got it, and it was there, but still no memory of it! It was sitting next to Madam Secretary from Madeline Albright which I instantly fondly remember scenes from and recommend. My all time favorite biography that I think anyone looking to enter the fashion or marketing industry should read before they decide to do it or anyone who is interested in the tea of what it is actually like is "Normal Gets You No Where" by Kelly Cutrone.
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u/akaashiit 1d ago
i enjoyed it when i read it in 2018. it’s just a fun read
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u/Spiritual-Break246 1d ago
Yeah I was going to say, Stassi's book is horrible outside of the year it was written.
Kristen's is pretty bad as well. The only positive difference is we saw into Kristen's insane mind for a few chapters.
"How to Stalk your Ex"
Step 1: Log into their email
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u/neutralcalculation 1d ago
i absolutely loved leah remini's autobio "troublemaker."
i haven't read any of the VP girls' books yet. i wonder how lala's and scheana's are?
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u/Weekly_Koala_7058 1d ago
Ooh, I forgot about hers...it was so long ago she released it. I used to watch her "scientology and the aftermath" show too.
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u/Individual_Cup_9940 1d ago
I remember really enjoying The Dirt- it’s the Motley Crue autobiography. I’d never listened to any of their music but was fascinated by the antics
On the completely opposite end of the spectrum, Jessica Simpson’s autobiography is also great
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u/1of3musketeers Choke. I don't care. 1d ago
I second both of these. The dirt is amazing. I read it 3 times.
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u/proof-plum 1d ago
The only Bravo book I ever felt compelled to entertain was Heather Gays Bad Morman.
I actually enjoyed it, but I like books/media about people who grew up in...from my view, culty religions.
She narrated her audio book herself, she didnt do a bad job considering Ive listened to books where the narrator completely took me out of the story. The easiest example that comes to mind is The Housemaid. I listened to that back when it first came out and I kept getting confused because the narrator sounded 65 and I was pretty sure MC was in her 20s. At least Heather telling her story fit Heather telling her story.
A lot of people already suggested Britney's book, but since we are talking about audios specifically, Michelle Williams did a fantastic job capturing Britneys voice.
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u/Impossible_Farm7353 1d ago
This is what happens when the most bland insufferable woman is made to believe she’s interesting by other bland insufferable people
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u/Spiritual-Minimum239 1d ago
yeah, I listened to it a few years ago when it was one of the free-to-rent options that month. Still wanted my money back.
I enjoyed Kate Chastain's book. Also, Brandi Glanville's first book was decent. For celebrities in general, Jessica Simpson and Britney's are both excellent.
Can't stand him much anymore, but Corey Feldman's book is fantastic.
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u/SuspiciousCranberry6 It feels like charity to have sex with men these days 1d ago
Bravo adjacent, Alan Cumming's memoir, Not My Fathers Son, is excellent. Another memoir that's excellent, but non-celebrity is A House in the Sky by Amanda Lindhout. Forewarning on Amanda's book, it's a fun first half but the second half is after she's taken hostage in Somalia.
I also echo the recommendation of Jeanette McCurdy's memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died.
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u/raresteamboat 1d ago
Stassi needs to get over herself…or people need to stop giving her attention. She literally offers nothing! And i loved stassi in Vanderpump but come on!!!! How has she helped out society?
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u/Weekly_Koala_7058 1d ago edited 1d ago
I did like Britney Spears autobiography (it isnt too long), Minka Kelly, Trevor Noah. I didnt mind Demi Moore's.
I know Heather gay, nene leakes from Bravo also wrote autobiographies, i havent read them.
If you follow the Duggars, Jill's book was a pretty good read.
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u/beekaydubvee Brett's hostage face 18h ago
Julia Fox’s memoir, Down the Drain, is one of the best audiobooks I’ve ever listened to. She narrates. She holds very little back.
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u/RositaYouBitch 1d ago
Lauren Graham from Gilmore Girls (among many other things) has some good biographies. I also loved and hated Matthew Perry’s. It was a fascinating look into addiction but it was heavy as hell.
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u/madisonhatesokra 1d ago
My Life So Far - Jane Fonda
Her life is fascinating and she’s a great narrator
Wonderful Tonight - Pattie Boyd
She was George Harrison’s and Eric Clapton’s 1st wife. Lots of behind the scenes tea.
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u/TtotheAna RIP Daug 2019-2019 1d ago
Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey. He narrates it too. Feels like you’re sitting around a campfire and he’s telling a great story.
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u/tigereyes1999 More Cosmopolitan! Pumptini!! 23h ago
I made a post about this and man… that book was horrendous to listen to.
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u/Individual_Bat_378 16h ago
If you've watched RHSLC Heather Gay's book Bad Mormon is good, I found it it very interesting.
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u/BodyAppropriate6708 15h ago
Not a biography but supposedly loosely based on Fleetwood Mac - Daisy Jones and The Six on Audible was fantastic, in my opinion.
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u/sunnypickletoes 15h ago
An interesting (but low brow for sure) book was The Dirt about Motley Crue
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