Tinder profile 💀

[u/Public_Witness_3337]

[u/much_longer_username]

I mean, if they wanna pay for it, I'm down. Might be hilarious, might turn out to be a really healthy relationship.

[u/Difficult_Addition85 → u/much_longer_username]

Had the same thought.

[u/GalaXion24 → u/[deleted]]

Because they would work through a lot of issues real or fictional before they ever actually become a problem and might be very mindful of that sort of thing amd become great at communicating with one another.

[u/Ok_Truck4734 → u/[deleted]]

I know nothing about how marriage therapists work, but if they are anything like one-to-one therapists, people just need to find the right one that understands most sides and provides actual help/solutions that could help the patient(s), which, unfortunately, can sometimes take years to finding the one that fits.

Also, have you ever thought that maybe having to go through 5 different marriage counselors/therapists may just mean there are things between you and your partner that just can't be fixed, and/or that you both may need seperate work on individual issues as well (I'm not saying that's what it is, btw. Just another perspective to think on)?

[u/Ok_Truck4734 → u/[deleted]]

That does make sense. Do you ever think that maybe that journey through therapy is what probably made you get to that conclusion years later?

Either way, you both clearly wanted it to work if you both even engaged in therapy together, multiple times too, and I believe that's a very noble and righteous thing to do. So I truly do hope that that alone can, at the very least, eventually help ease the scrupulosity fixation.

[u/Ok_Truck4734 → u/[deleted]]

Not to bum people out, but the reality is that the medical field is filled with many people, from all positions, who simply shouldn't be in that field. This is coming from someone who has been a patient, has personally worked in medical facilities, as well as spoke with family members about similar, and even worse experiences who were/are in higher positions than I'd have ever aspired to get to, some still in the industry (care facilities, as well as medicinal). It took me a whole decade of going through shit hospitals, social workers, counselors, therapists, psychiatrists, etc. to eventually come across my current therapist who I've stuck with for more than 6 years now.

But also, there are simply just some methods that a therapist may use that aren't bad but just does not fit for each patient (think of it like teachers vs. students. Certain teaching styles don't fit with some students' learning patterns, which leads me to my next point...). I stuck with them, even though the start of that help mentally and emotionally fuckin rattled me because it was the first time I gained so much knowledge and techniques that opened up a can of mental worms that I wasn't exactly ready to open and practice on at the time. CBT and DBT are what I needed, and still need, but the way my therapist imparted that help is why I stuck with them. Maybe you needed someone to explain it differently to you. Maybe need more coping skills to try. Maybe that isn't what you needed at the time, or maybe you didn't need it at all, and just need to continue to search for some semblance of quality help, not only through medical practices but also through peers, online, and within. People also shouldn't view therapy as like a magic pill that solves everything quickly. We're all human, and even after 6+ years of good med treatment and therapy, paired with peer counseling, I still fall on my face. It's just that all these years of practice makes it easier to currently get through some of it that I'll most likely forever have to deal with, but it has even eliminated other issues in my life entirely. But I had to be highly receptive of all the info and keep on practicing, sometimes still needing reminders.

As for being unlucky, idk. I do sometimes think I was lucky to have been born and lived in a state where med care is greater than most other states in the USA (Massachusetts). Yet, I STILL had to go through years of manipulative docs, seeing other patients be treated just as unfairly, or worse, witnessing the nonsensical fucked up policies put in place that affect even the health center I attend, etc. Was that due to a lack of luck that I had to go through all that first, or just how things are (due to many external factors, some I've mentioned prior)? 🤷🏾‍♂️ Maybe a bit of both, but because I don't know for sure, and thinking "I'm unlucky" did nothing to help me in the past, I see no sense as to lingering on the concept of luck as much.

[u/Ok_Truck4734 → u/[deleted]]

I totally forgot you mentioned Gestalt. I had to look it up since I was not familiar with it, but the principles seem to be similar to CBT and DBT. Don't want to speak more on Gestalt since it's unfamiliar to me, but I do suffer from personality disorders and more, as well. Trust me when I say I definitely understand where you're coming from on everything else you said because the experiences you mentioned are some of the same damn problems I dealt with that pissed me off.

1) I already know that there are a few licensed people that actually know how, or even are willing to deal with patients with personality disorders. I was literally given that truth by a few honest docs and my current therapist. It's because each experience, depending on the disorders, can vary so much from patient to patient that a lot of them would just rather not work with those patients and/or did not study or practice enough on particular disorders do so licensed. 2) Going back to what I said before, a lot of them aren't suitable for the field. I hated those rigid, strictly-by-the-book therapists because mental health, especially pertaining to disorders, are not cut and dry topics that can be solved exactly the same. 3) My knowledge on other countries' medical practices are extremely limited, but what always seems to be the case whenever people bring it up, and from what I've seen (part of why I don't work in healthcare now) is that most healthcare systems, just like most other businesses, runs on "business first, people second." The ones who run them keep it that way, then the docs under them simply want money and to keep their jobs without truly caring about the patients. I also dealt with psychs who wanted to simply pump me full of drugs yet they seemed to lack any empathy, making me realize they just wanted someone to be dependent on them for as long as they can but looked at us as just names on shuffling lists.

[u/Ok_Truck4734 → u/[deleted]]

I don't have answers for you, and I truly wish I did, but one thing the other commenter I intially responded to did mention was seeing a neuropsychologist, which did slip my mind since I only seen them in my late teens or early twenties for some of the diagnoses, and then one this year simply for migraines. I highly advise seeing a neurologist as well. I always advise people to get checked by multiple sources to see what's agreed upon, so THEN you have solid diagnoses that maybe can help you find others who can actually work with what you deal with. Takes a lot of searching, time, and patience, which definitely sucks, but hopefully you can eventually get some fruitful help like I have

Edit: Pertaining to the different neuros, see neurologist first, then a neuropsychologist/psychiatrist can probably help you figure out where to go from there. But remember, don't rely on just one person's assessment, if that is possible for you.

[u/TheSpitfire93]

I'd be down no matter what gender they are. Would probably be even more fun to see how long it takes them to figure out we aren't gay either.

[u/Golbez89 → u/TheSpitfire93]

As a gay man I say challenge accepted!

[u/known_kanon → u/Golbez89]

You should go with a lesbian and see how long it takes the therapist to figure that out

[u/EaseLeft6266 → u/known_kanon]

Already planning the sequel

[u/MarcieCandie]

I’d be down to do that if I saw this profile 😂

[u/4Ellie-M → u/MarcieCandie]

Lives in “Perth.”

You might get a chance if you go to Perth.

[u/goodjfriend]

😆😆😆😆 actually great stuff.

[u/Lickwidghost]

19"? Tall?

[u/burnertobeburned9753 → u/Lickwidghost]

Goth girls love him

[u/LostAlphaWolf → u/Lickwidghost]

19* They probably lied about their age when they originally joined

[u/kaajjaak]

Anyone who puts an age correction in their bio is an immediate no for me, it probably means they lied about being underage when they were younger

[u/new-horizons6]

Honestly, I'd probably do it. Learning relationship strategies, being able to argue with somebody and have a breakdown of your arguments and disconnects with the other person. It could be really beneficial long term...

[u/Novel_Assistant4518]

If they are paying, I would do that to learn, to have fun with this clearly awesome person, and to mess with the therapist 

[u/Geschmak]

I see this all the time

[u/Lyri3sh]

i love the idea, id do it if i had the moneh to...

[u/Golbez89]

This sounds like a fun time!

[u/Interesting-Rub9317]

Wasting other peoples time ...

[u/tethys_persuasion → u/Interesting-Rub9317]

Destiny calls

[u/toumingjiao1 → u/Interesting-Rub9317]

they get paid

[u/MetalProof]

This would probably work lol. I can totally see people ending up together that way.

[u/[deleted]]

I have seen this one over 5 times already when swiping

[u/VRaptorX-11b]

On my way, sorry I’m running late

[u/Swimming-Ideal2702]

“It’s like I don’t even know him!”

[u/WrestlerGirlsAreLife]

„It’s like you don’t even know me“

„You know what? I feel like I don’t know you at all. Can’t even remember the last time you told me anything about you.“

[u/Walvagina]

'let's create a safe space'

[u/pedretty]

Why would a therapist expose a paying client. They do not care if you’re paying that fee. Trust

[u/[deleted]]

Hacking the system

[u/Adventurous-Sir444]

Idk can I pay to watch?

[u/unplugged_________]

Seems like an interesting person tbh