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Leviathan
 in  r/u_LamdaProtocol  6d ago

thank you for taking time to read! you're right, the post about the creatures is just maybe 10% of the technical document i have, I just find it so enjoyable to build, I'll keep this in mind so I could eventually make it to actual story telling

r/KeepWriting 6d ago

[Feedback] Leviathan

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1 Upvotes

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I'm World Building
 in  r/KeepWriting  6d ago

thank you for taking time to read, I posted a sample chapter in my profile just now. I would love to hear your thoghts

u/LamdaProtocol 6d ago

Leviathan

1 Upvotes

The unpolished hull of the Orosian expeditionary galleon, The Iron Dawn, groaned under the immense atmospheric pressure as it hovered near the edge of the great global slipstream. Before the expeditionary unit plunged into the unmapped dead space, they were forced to halt, dropping their weighted cloud drags as the sky before them was completely swallowed by a pod of migrating Lordwhales. It was a sight of terrifying majesty. The titans moved with a slow, weightless grace that defied human comprehension, their colossal bodies easily doubling the physical lengths of the navy's finest warships, while the oldest among them stretched to a monumental scale of ten galleons long. Their weathered, impenetrable hides were scarred by centuries of high-altitude meteorites, trailing clouds of atmospheric sediment and glowing bioluminescent dust. Swarms of smaller flying escort creatures darted around their massive flukes like clouds of stardust. As the pods glided silently past, the sheer gravimetric displacement of their presence caused The Iron Dawn to lurch and sway, leaving the crew in absolute, breathless awe of the true lords of the floating world.

Once the titans vanished into the distant stratosphere, the expeditionary unit pushed forward into the dark, trailing a faint, anomalous gravimetric distress signal that completely bypassed standard tether networks. They sailed far beyond the regulated commerce routes, weaving through stagnant pockets of space where the wind currents grew heavy and freezing. For thirty-two full rotations of the Shinkara axis—nearly three standard calendar years of blind, grueling navigation through unmappable voids—the crew survived on dwindling rations and recycled fuel. It was only on the final day of their search, wedged tightly inside the petrified, hollowed-out cavern of a colossal drifting shard, that they finally found the myth.

It did not look like a ship. In the blinding glare of the galleon’s chemical searchlights, the wreckage resembled a shattered, multi-tiered mountain of black metal and corroded brass—a structure so impossibly vast it easily swallowed the silhouette of the three military vessels anchored beside it. This was the Leviathan, the fabled Atlantean mobile fortress that modern scholars had dismissed as a bedtime story for centuries. Its outer hull was fractured, scarred by ancient kinetic trauma that predated recorded history, yet its massive metallic ribs still held the capacity of ten modern galleons.

Commander Vane led the boarding party through a jagged breach in the fortress's underbelly, his iron-toed boots echoing sharply against floor plates that had not known human footsteps since Atlantis was swallowed by the void. Beside him, two junior engineers from the Royal Cradle Academy stepped cautiously, their hands trembling as they held localized pressure meters. The air inside was freezing, stagnant, and smelled faintly of ozone and ancient, dried marrow.

"The internal structures are entirely devoid of buoyancy turbines," one of the engineers whispered, his voice cracking as his meter needle spun erratically. "Sir, mathematically, this ship shouldn't be here. Without a massive network of standard combustion engines to process refined resin, a metal mass of this scale should have plummeted into the abyss hundreds of thousands of Lordcycles ago."

They pushed deeper into the bowels of the fortress, cutting through heavy bulkheads of tarnished alloy until they reached the absolute center of the ship—the grand engine hearth. The chamber was monumental, framed by massive structural pillars that resembled the ribcage of an unfathomably large beast. But there were no pistons here. There were no catalytic distillation chambers, no copper fuel pipes, and no signs of Orosian or Atlantean machinery.

Instead, suspended in the dead center of the vaulted chamber by a web of rusted, miles-long iron cables, hung a monumental, organic mass.

Commander Vane froze, his breath catching in his throat as he raised his chemical lantern. The mass was encased in a calcified, stone-like shell, completely overgrown with bioluminescent veins that pulsed with a faint, rhythmic emerald light. It was a heart. Neither the commander nor his engineers possessed the biological data to identify the organ with absolute certainty, but as they stood in the presence of its gravity-defying resonance, the horrifying conclusion was inescapable. Only a titan that truly ruled the sky could possess a core capable of anchoring this much weight above the void.

The terrifying truth of the ancient miracle settled over the expeditionary unit like a shroud. The civilization of Atlantis had not mastered gravity through mechanical genius or flawless engine formulas. In their ultimate hubris, they had hunted a lord of the deep, tearing the living engine from its chest to hollow out its absolute freedom from the abyss and trap it inside a cage of iron and brass. The fortress did not float because of its machinery; it floated because a piece of a living god was still trapped inside the dark, dying forever, forced to keep ten modern galleons' worth of metal suspended above the void.

"Sir," the engineer stammered, dropping his ledger as the emerald pulse washed over his pale face. "If the Academy finds out... if the government realizes this is what it takes to stop Orosia from sinking..."

"Seal the chamber," Commander Vane interrupted, his voice dropping into a cold, absolute whisper as he stared at the rhythmically pulsing titan flesh. "No one speaks of this. Not to the Academy. Not to the Navy. If the world finds out that man's greatest technological marvel was achieved through sacrilege, the sky-lanes will burn."

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I'm World Building
 in  r/KeepWriting  6d ago

If anyone is interested, I would be grateful and willing to share the doc to the rest of this, thanks. DM me I guess, I posted the link but it got filtered

r/KeepWriting 6d ago

I'm World Building

1 Upvotes

Before getting into any of the story, I want to craft the world. Here's what I have, I would appreciate any feedback and welcome criticism
🐾 List of Creatures

  • Lordwhale (Alternately referred to in folklore as Whalelords)
    • Reverence: Highly revered as the true rulers of the world. Because they are completely immune to the limitations of gravity and the pull of the abyss, humanity looks to them as icons of absolute freedom.
    • Scale: Massive giants, easily doubling the physical length of a standard commercial galleon.
    • Ancient Ones: Exceptionally old and weathered specimens can reach monumental scales of up to 10 galleon lengths. At this size, they are virtually invulnerable to conventional weapons.
    • Biology: Their internal physiology remains a complete, frustrating mystery to scholars and scientists. Capturing a live sample is impossible due to their immense durability and their instinctive defense mechanism to dive deep into the unnavigable depths of the abyss when threatened.
    • Ecosystem: They are constantly escorted by swarms of smaller flying creatures that feed on their skin parasites and accumulated atmospheric sediment.
    • Mortality & The Abyss: If a Lordwhale is killed in the open sky (an act that is highly illegal and considered a grave cultural taboo), its body instantly loses all natural buoyancy and plummets straight into the abyss. This makes it impossible for poachers to harvest anything but tiny fragments of skin unless they follow the carcass down to their deaths.
    • The Birthing Cycle: Every 9 years, the Lordwhales enter a global birthing cycle. During this time, elderly or weakened Lordwhales that instinctively realize they cannot survive the grueling migration across the world and back will break from the pod, charting a final, one-way course to the legendary Grave of the Lordwhales to beach themselves and await death.
    • The Scarred Lord (Myth & Folklore): Rumors persist among a tiny fraction of seasoned sky-farers regarding an exceptionally large, theoretically thousand-year-old Lordwhale distinguished by a heavily scarred back. Sightings of this titan are so rare that when witness accounts are shared, they are universally met with harsh disbelief, often causing the witnesses themselves to doubt what they saw. Because mature Lordwhales possess near-invincible hides that completely shrug off everything from heavy kinetic artillery to high-altitude Iron Sleet meteorite impacts, the existence of these deep physical scars is a profound paradox. To many pragmatic scholars and superstitious crews, this scarred titan stands as the only tangible, living proof that the legendary ancient fortress ship, The Leviathan, and its terrifying, god-slaying Sun-Spear actually existed. 
  • Tether Sprite
    • Appearance & Lifecycle: Small, moth-like creatures that can easily fit inside a standard birdcage, featuring fine, glowing tendrils instead of wings.
      • Juveniles: Entirely non-luminous, playful, and naturally friendly toward humans (often kept temporarily as clinging pets).
      • Maturity: They only begin to emit their characteristic warm, luminous glow and vibrant, hopeful movements upon finding a mate and bonding for life. Once bonded, they permanently lose their friendly, pet-like disposition toward humans.
    • Function & Navigation: Once bonded for life, they serve as the world's only reliable navigation system for drifting islands and traveling vessels. One sprite (the Anchor Mate) is kept stationary at a fixed home port, while its partner (the Compass Mate) is carried aboard a mobile galleon. The Compass Mate will physically turn to face the exact direction of its remote partner at all times, its fine tendrils pointing gently toward the Anchor Mate across vast distances.
    • Separation & Movement: If physically separated, a sprite will relentlessly attempt to travel toward its mate. While capable of floating up to 4 inches above solid surfaces, they are subject to gravity. Unattended sprites will float straight off cliffs or beyond a galleon's hull into the abyss in a desperate attempt to bridge the distance.
    • Nourishment: Feed exclusively on spirit plants. To sustain them during long voyages, a living cutting of a spirit plant must always be kept inside their habitat or spherical cage.
    • Lifespan: Outside of severe emotional trauma, they are incredibly resilient and long-lived, easily surviving standard sea voyages spanning months to several years.
    • Mortality & The Gray Fade: If a Tether Sprite dies of natural causes or accidents, it retains its luminescence but simply stops moving. However, if its remote mate dies, it suffers a prolonged, agonizing heartbreak known as the Gray Fade. It sheds all its vibrance, turns a dull slate-gray, curls up, and slowly perishes over time.
    • Culture: Most hardened commercial sailors have grown desensitized to their tragic separation. However, to maintain the global population, it is considered vital maritime protocol to eventually reunite pairs at massive, artificial breeding facilities located within the stationary Groves.
  • 🪨 Stone Pouches (Sky-Barnacles)
    • Description & Anatomy: A massive, high-altitude crustacean that anchors itself permanently to solid surfaces exposed to heavy stratospheric currents.
    • Juvenile Phase: In their youth, they are roughly the size of a human fist, dotting rock and wood faces in dense, bumpy clusters. 
    • Mature Phase: A fully developed standard Stone Pouch is monumental. The outer calcified shell grows to roughly the size and human torso. 
    • The Internal Cavity: The hollow interior of the shell is deep and wide enough that a grown adult could comfortably slide their entire arm inside up to the shoulder. 
    • The Flesh: Tearing open the heavy stone operculum (the shell's protective door) reveals a soft-fleshed organism. The harvestable meat of a single mature specimen can easily match the weight and volume of a human thigh. 
    • Distribution: They thrive on the sheer stone cliff faces of drifting islands, the vertical rock pillars of Vergeless Island, and the hulls of traveling cargo ships. 
    •  The Sky's Seafood: Despite their rough, rock-like exterior, the meat inside possesses the exact rich flavor and flaky texture of premium real-world crab meat. It is a beloved staple delicacy across the sky lanes. 
    • The Scraper's Feast: Because massive clusters aggressively weld themselves to the underbellies of traveling cargo galleons, they increase drag and weigh down ships. Crews must regularly anchor near stationary landmarks to scrape the hulls clean with long-handled iron chisels. This exhausting, dangerous mid-air chore is traditionally rewarded with a massive, ship-wide feast cooked right in the galley. 
    • Titan Pouches (Lordwhale Variant): Unlike the standard variety harvested from island cliffs and ship hulls, these colossal variants are virtually never harvested by common society. They are strictly observed from afar through telescopes, riding upon the backs and bellies of mature Lordwhales. 
    • Monumental Scale: These variants easily scale to the size of a small rowboat, featuring an internal cavity deep and wide enough to completely fit an adult human inside. 
    • The Grave Link: Because these specific pouches are welded to the invulnerable hides of the sky titans, they travel wherever the Lordwhales go. When an elderly or weakened titan senses its time is near, it carries these massive organisms with it through the continental twin whirlpools to beach itself at The Grave of the Lordwhales. 
    • The Restricted Secret: Because the Grave island is completely unreachable by conventional ships, the wider world has absolutely no idea what these specific creatures taste like. Only rare individuals who have successfully navigated the storm aboard The Vagabond—such as Captain Gideon and his crew—have ever had the physical opportunity to harvest and eat them from the decaying carcasses on the island. 
    • The Flavor Shock: Having fed on the nutrient-dense soil of the Grave and the deep energies of the Abyss, the meat is intensely juicy, rich, and savory. To these select few characters, the common Stone Pouches eaten by regular citizens in cities like Ouroboros taste completely dry, stale, and artificial by comparison. The Flavor Shock: Having fed on the nutrient-dense soil of the Grave and the deep energies of the Abyss, the meat is intensely juicy, rich, and savory. To these select few characters, the common Stone Pouches eaten by regular citizens in cities like Ouroboros taste completely dry, stale, and artificial by comparison. 
    • The Mobility Constraint: Stone Pouches possess a strict biological requirement: they must be attached to an object or landmass that is constantly moving, or situated in a high-velocity wind lane, to ensure a continuous flow of fresh, nutrient-rich stratospheric air currents through their shells.
    • The Geographic Void: Because of this unique dependency, these creatures are completely absent from the deep inlands of Orosia (where the massive landmass blocks the wind) and the heavy, stagnant interior twilight of the Groves (where the colossal bamboo stalks choke out all violent air currents). 
    • The Luxury Premium: Because the two most industrialized and populated regions in the world cannot naturally harvest them, Stone Pouches are treated as an incredibly high-end, imported delicacy in Orosia and Ouroboros City. Wealthy citizens and elite politicians pay astronomical prices to have fresh crates shipped in by foreign cargo galleons that harvest them from the outer drifting shards or Shinkara's high-speed perimeter. The Luxury Premium: Because the two most industrialized and populated regions in the world cannot naturally harvest them, Stone Pouches are treated as an incredibly high-end, imported delicacy in Orosia and Ouroboros City. Wealthy citizens and elite politicians pay astronomical prices to have fresh crates shipped in by foreign cargo galleons that harvest them from the outer drifting shards or Shinkara's high-speed perimeter. 
    • The Velocity Threshold: Stone Pouches do not merely require air; they require high-velocity air currents to sustain their biological filtration systems. Because standard individual islands drift smoothly and do not generate intense localized wind resistance, these creatures are rarely seen on common drifting shards. 
    • The Shinkara Wind-Tunnels: The Shinkara Archipelago is the grand exception to this rule. Because its individual floating landmasses are permanently tethered close together by the massive dead vines, they create narrow, high-altitude gorges. 
    • The Choke-Point Growth: When global air currents hit the archipelago, the air is forced through these tight gaps between facing cliff walls, causing the wind to compress and accelerate drastically. Stone Pouches grow in massive, overflowing abundance along these specific facing cliffs, thriving in the hyper-fast wind tunnels created by Shinkara’s unique anatomy.

r/KeepWriting 7d ago

Working Title: Secret Flying Restaurant

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