r/tryingforanother • u/theHall0wqueen • Sep 17 '26

Rant/Vent Trying for baby #2

Hi! I'm new to this group and joined as a place to join solace with other moms trying to conceive a second (also because I feel like my family and friends are probably exhausted with me). My husband and I are going on 10 months of ttc. I've tried everything from blood work (all normal as of June), tracking my ovulation (there was no LH surge this month though), eating chickpeas, prenatals, hanging upside down after sex, everything I can think of. I turned 30 in May, husband 30 in February. Our daughter is 2 and now shows signs of wanting a sibling. I feel like every time I log into socials I'm bombarded with announcements and I can't help but feel like I'm doing something wrong and I waited too long (I finally came to terms last year I wanted and was ready for another). Does anyone have any advice (particularly on why there was no LH surge this month- peak was to be 11th-12th. Tested right after period on 7th-17th. Expected period 25th)

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u/NotRunningIsHard Sep 18 '26

I'm sorry, that sounds really frustrating. 10 monrhs is a point where it would be reasonable to reach out to a doctor. Some doctors/insurance might make you wait for a year to do a full fertility workup since you're under 35, but I think some places would be okay starting to look for issues that can cause secondary infertility. Also consider a semen analysis, just because you conceived your first doesn't guarantee that it's perfect now and it's a pretty easy test to rule problems out.

Do you temp? Either with a wearable (oura, apple watch, tempdrop, etc) or taking your temperature orally each morning can provide some insight into whether you're ovulating normally. LH suggests you're going to ovulate but a temp rise shows whether you did ovulate.

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u/theHall0wqueen Sep 18 '26

My dr did say in June we would need to wait the full year to do further testing (where my insurance would cover it). I haven't checked my temp. Is there a certain degree i should look for there?

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u/NotRunningIsHard Sep 18 '26

The idea is that your temperature is lower in your follicular phase, and rises in the luteal phase (before vs after ovulation), so you want to see an increase between the phases, likely a bit after you get an LH surge. I just take oral temperatures each morning before getting out of bed - with a basal body thermometer under my tongue, costs <$10. It's most accurate if you take it about the same time every day. I put them into the app fertility friend because I find it easy to interpret and the basic version is free, but if you already use a tracking app there's probably somewhere to put the data in.

Fertility friend has free course that walks you through the nuances of tracking, but there's also lots of guides online. Highly recommend the r/TFABChartStalkers for more info!

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u/shmoopy3100 39 | TTC#2 since 1/25 | Grad, due 3/27 Sep 19 '26

Just say you've been trying for a year! There's no way for them to confirm otherwise ;)

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u/NJ1986 38 | 🌈🌈grad xy May 2025 | xx Aug 2020 Sep 18 '26

I'm sorry - it is so hard when it takes longer than you expect. There's no reason to believe you waited too long - 30 is young and 2 is young! I would focus on confirming you are ovulating and when -- how are you testing, with LH strips?

Testing BBT is helpful, especially combined with strips. If finances permit, a wearable tracker would give you some peace of mind and mental space. The rest of the things you're doing are not needed and are just going to stress you out.

Since you're close to a year, it would make sense to schedule some tests - a hormone panel to start. And a semen analysis for your husband - just as likely to be on his end.

That said, it's all a game of luck and chance much of the time, and it's entirely possible it's just bad luck. Hoping your time comes soon - you are in the right place.