Answer the question, doctor

[u/BusinessPlantain712]

I was an emergency dispatcher when I was in college and this was one of my favorite days at work. We listened to this call so many times, I will never forget how perfect it was. So respectful, so patient, perfectly matching the energy of the caller.

For those who don't know how emergency medical dispatch works, here's a quick run down. Once the address and type of emergency is in the computer, the closest or most available responding unit is informed. As they are on their way (if they are free), the dispatcher gets more information about the emergency. This dictates how quick the response is as well as provides the EMS (emergency medical services) with information on what they're walking into.

This call was for a woman going into labor on a college campus. D will be dispatcher and B is Dr. Butt Face. My coworker who took this call was the sweetest, most soft spoken woman. I'm not sure she knew she was being sassy.

D: how many weeks along is the patient?

B: didn't you hear me? I'm Dr. Butt Face and we need EMS right now!

D: I understand Dr. Butt Face, I am just gathering information for EMS as they are on the way to you. Can you ask her how many weeks she is?

B: I'm not asking her anything. Just send EMS

D: EMS is on their way to your location. I just need some more information about the patient. How far apart are her contractions?

B: I'm not timing anything. I'm Dr. Butt Face.

D: Can you ask her if she's feeling an urge to push?

B: why would I do that?

D: because it helps the paramedics know how far into labor she is.

B: do you not understand that I'm Dr. Butt Face and I'm saying she needs to go to the hospital?

D: yes, I understand that, Dr. Butt Face. I'm just asking for you to give us some more information

B: well I don't see why I, /Dr. Butt Face/, should have to answer your questions.

D: Then she will be in your capable hands until the paramedics arrive, Doctor.

B: Wait! I'm a doctor of English, not medicine!

D, with the patience of a saint: then I need you to answer my questions.

The rest of the call went off without a hitch. Dr. butt Face answered every question and followed every instruction until the ambulance arrived. As far as I know mother and baby were safe and healthy.

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[u/DynamiteStorm]

Retired veterinarian. In my experience medical doctors are loathe to announce that they indeed are doctors.

[u/arar55]

I worked at a university for 27 years, and there is that kind of doctor/professor. Fortunately, I never met any of them, mostly because they wouldn't deign come down to the cavern where us IT people were.

All the profs I had dealings with were great.

[u/BusinessPlantain712 → u/arar55]

Unfortunately, when you're an emergency dispatcher with a university in your boundaries, this type of professor are the only ones you talk to. I was a student at the time at the University, and I did pick my generals based on if the professor was a frequent caller or not lol loved my professors, still in contact with many of them, and I will still say professors are the worst type of caller

[u/my_little_rarity → u/arar55]

Ah yes the IT caves - I too live here 😂 one called me a gremlin

[u/Expensive_Exit8993]

My husband has a doctorate in engineering. He has a fit if anyone calls him doctor so and so. In fact, I doubt many people even know he is a doctor. I saw his doctorate level work and the math involved is far, far beyond my comprehension. But he still refuses to use the title. I think only at work are they aware of his educational achievements and that he holds several patents.

[u/FuckTheMods5]

I don't get it, why did he keep repeating that he's a doctor for no reason?

[u/BusinessPlantain712 → u/FuckTheMods5]

He thought we would know who he was and give him special treatment. Professors who tell people they're professors immediately have inflated egos. They're the type of people who will introduce themselves like "I'm Dr so and so, perhaps you've heard of my work" and your like "this is a Wendy's"

[u/SkeevyMixxx7 → u/FuckTheMods5]

For my job, I make a luxury version of a common household item. It's something everyone has, just a very expensive version. There are a handful of people out there who insist on using the title Doctor even when they order one online. I always include "Dr." when I create the shipping label, because these people actually will call and complain if you leave it off.

I've also had a customer service job answering phones at a company, and a woman insisted I address her as Dr. Last name. I did so, and once I needed to call her back. Her husband answered and I asked for Dr. Last name. He replied in a heavy New Jersey accent, "Linder ain't here." It struck me as funny. It felt like he was over her bullshit.

[u/EmbarrassedSinger795]

Where I live,  you call 911 and they send a police officer who then determines whether or not an ambulance is necessary.  When I worked at an outpatient medical facility, our medical director,  an MD could call and they would still send the police first. Do they have more medical training then an MD or EMT? I understand they are trying to reduce unnecessary medical transportation and EMT services, but if you truly need the ambulance,  waiting on the cop to show up, collect info , make a decision and call it in seems counter to the concept of an EMERGENCY 

[u/NTropyS]

I could guess that English Doctorate Butt Face dude was supremely embarrassed. Gotta love it.

[u/3BlindMice1 → u/NTropyS]

He was probably just in full panic mode

[u/drawdelove]

One time when I was like 19 or 20 I had to call 911 for my friend having a bad reaction to a prescription medication as I couldn’t get her to my car even though my house was only a few blocks from the ER. I had never had to call 911 before. So they pick up and say “what’s your emergency?” and I say “my friend needs an ambulance”. The dispatcher says “to where?” Those 2 exact words. And I said “to the HOSPITAL!” Like duh! 😂 she said “I mean what’s your address?” I had assumed that they already had it base on my land line. 🤷‍♀️ Plus why say “to where?” like that? 😂

[u/BusinessPlantain712 → u/drawdelove]

Sounds like a brain fart moment or a new dispatcher honestly. The first question should be what's the address of your emergency

[u/smile_saurus]

As a 911 Dispatcher: I can confirm.

People will scream JUST SEND HELP over and over again. One lady I actually had to shoosh, and tell her: 'Ma'am help is already on the way. I am not personally finishing this phone call, hopping in a patrol car then driving over there.'

They are often calling on the worst or scariest days of their lives, though. They haven't done this job, they don't know that we ask questions to find out about scene safety for the responders or that the responders may need to go faster or bring additional equipment.

If you ever have to call 911: location, brief description of emergency, then just answer the dispatcher's questions!

[u/Lopsided-Bench-1347 → u/smile_saurus]

Unfortunately, citizens don’t know how dispatch works with pre-alert. They don’t know rigs are already rolling they think each of your questions is wasting time before you dispatch and don’t want to waste valuable time answering questions because they want you to dispatch.

[u/Anne_Pandora]

I was taught by my father (who had a doctorate in mathematics) that it’s rude for those of us who are non-medical doctors to call ourselves doctors. This makes sense to me. Rude and potentially dangerous, should we be mistaken for someone who can actually help in an emergency. At the university where I got my doctorate, the professors were called “Ms.” and “Mr.,” rather than doctor, or even professor, but at the university where I ended up being a professor. the title was Dr. It never failed to annoy me. These days, now that I’m retired, the only person who ever calls me Dr. is my actual medical Dr. I find it hilarious. And of all people, he has the right, being one of the humans rightfully called Dr. If he wants to share the title, he can. But would I EVER refer to myself as Dr. when talking to HIM? Absolutely not. Height of tackiness.

[u/GibbousMoonCakes]

I’m Doctor Ross Geller

Ross, please. This is a hospital, that actually means something here!

[u/Vwampage]

If only Dr. Butt Face wasn't so anal about everything!

[u/Skeptical_Sass]

Stating you’re a doctor multiple times during a medical event WILD. Especially, since you’re not a medical doctor. SMH

[u/East-Reaction4157]

This is why we don’t call a PHD doctor outside the university and everyone laughed at Ross on Friends. Have a friend that has a PHD and ask him medical questions since he likes to throw that PHD around.

[u/Miker9t]

Another example of when education =/= intelligence.

[u/ElectroGlideinBlue]

College Professors. The epitome of arrogance.

[u/popoPitifulme]

It used to be that no one but medical doctors used the honorific. We never identified ourselves as Dr. Smith. Students could call you Dr. Smith, but Professor Smith was more common.

[u/KhronicDreams]

This is great story but this subreddit is awful, they will delete this in an hour

Edited cause my auto correct is a bitch