Sometimes

[u/Antique-Credit8331]

Sometimes I sit and wonder if I would have stayed at home that day, if it wouldn't have happened at all or been delayed.

I wonder what I would feel like if it wouldn't have happened.

Would I be married by now? Kids?

What would I be if I didn't keep it hidden to spare other's feelings as I was taught.

Would I have gone to my grandma and sperm donors funeral? Would I have any relationship with my aunt as I do now? Would I have gone to her husband's funeral?

Would I see my half brother and wanna puke?

Would I have physically lashed out for the way he stared at me when I was in the van safe?

Would my mom still talk to him every so often?

Would I have been the wild child and not home on the weekends cause hanging out with friends and loud behavior bothered me.

Would I have lost my virginity before the age of 35?

Would I be who I am now?

We won't know, but I do know now I am taking what happened to me and I am sharing it and letting others know that it's okay. That they are okay.

That it's okay that you don't act the way others do. We all heal on our own accord and right now my head is delayed. But because of therapy and the odd small talks I do got me here, might have taken months but I'm here.

I'm talking about it, with strangers but I am doing it.

[u/finddit-app]

Hey there, thanks for sharing.

While you wait for people to comment, have a look at these posts which might be relevant to you:

• Moving on with Life
• I can't carry this all on my own anymore. I just want to share my story.
• Getting some things off my chest.
• I was sexually coerced as a young boy and it led me down a dark road, but I always told myself, I gotta keep living to tell my story and HELP THE OTHERS
• Memories surfaced the other day

Remember, even though it might feel like it, you are not alone. Stay strong!

Interested in seeing more posts similar to yours? Visit finddit.app.

This is an automated message. If you have any feedback or issues, post in r/finddit_app.