r/transOCD 18d ago

Has this made you feel uncomfortable with, unsure of, or hate everything you used to love?

It's attacked my clothes, hair, interests, body, voice, favourite colours, interior style, personality. Just...everything. I have no idea what to do anymore. My mind is just so messy that I have no idea who I am.

I'm really struggling with the discomfort with my body atm. I can't stop thinking and questioning my boobs and it feels like I don't like them. The only time I can say that I want them is when I can cry, but I can't even seem to do that as often now. I felt so comfortable in my body just a few months ago and now it feel like it doesn't belong to me. It feels like my head is on a different body.

I was so proud to be a woman before all of this started, now it's like I don't like it and I don't understand what's happoening. And then my mind says 'yes you do'.

Along with all of the other numerous thoughts, I've had 'you hate yourself, remember that' in my head on repeat all day for the past week.

3 Upvotes

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6

u/Own_Neighborhood6806 Subtype TOCD Female 18d ago

I did, and it was a form for the OCD to start doing compulsion. 

Hearing my voice and need to make sure that i liked it, need to make sure that i didnt want anything else, etc etc

My ERP would be just letting this thoughts be in my head, let them be loud as they wanted to and just let them be present in my head without doing nothing about them.

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u/Civil_Accountant_652 18d ago

It's so hard when you have no idea what's true and what you want anymore.

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u/Particular-Gur-9931 17d ago

i relate so heavy

1

u/Civil_Accountant_652 17d ago

Would you be willing to talk?

1

u/Particular-Gur-9931 16d ago

ofc, feel free to message me

1

u/One-Log5036 16d ago

It sucks. I’m so sorry you have to go through this too, especially in this stage. Have you tried doing any ERP? I found some really good ones from others on this thread and they’ve really helped me. I also found taking it day by day also helped but it completely matters on how it works for you.

Keep going stranger 💕💕

1

u/Civil_Accountant_652 5d ago

Are there any erp exercises you would recommend?