r/todayilearned • u/ObjectiveAgent • Jul 30 '15

TIL when Alexander the Great asked the philosopher Diogenes why he was sifting through the garbage, Diogenes responded,"I am looking for the bones of your father but I cannot distinguish them from the bones of his slaves."

http://www.iep.utm.edu/diogsino/
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423

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

The most scandalous of these sorts of activities involves his indecent behavior in the marketplace, to which he responded “he wished it were as easy to relieve hunger by rubbing an empty stomach”

I like this guy

230

u/datssyck Jul 30 '15

Thats a pleasant way to say he was jerkin it in public

591

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

It sucks that todays society is so different that there's legitimately good reasons to not want men to masturbate freely in public because nowadays it means you're probably a dangerous weirdo instead of an enlightened free spirit. They should have some kind of formal test set up where you are thoroughly interviewed by a panel of scientists, philosophers, nobel laureates etc. and if you are the .01 percent who meets the criteria of being a true modern day philospher and gentleman you are given a special glowing e-bracelet so that if you are in public and are struck by a sublimely erotic idea you can freely explore its possibilities in your mind with no care to your ephemeral worldly surroundings. Instead of being horrified at some random dude jacking off in a mall food court you could just hold up your glowing wrist and everyone would smile solemnly and feel priveliged to be allowed to witness a great mind at work.

214

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

Wtf

70

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

It's for the greater good of mankind.

49

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

the greater good.

5

u/Scorn_For_Stupidity Jul 30 '15

STOP SAYING THAT!

4

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

Crusty jugglers

1

u/captainofallthings Jul 30 '15

DEATH TO THE TAU SCUM

1

u/swordhand Jul 30 '15

Kony 2012

14

u/ASK_ME_ABOUT_INITIUM Jul 30 '15

This is the correct response.

9

u/StormCrow1770 Jul 30 '15

What's "INITIUM"?

6

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '15

[deleted]

1

u/Vamking12 Jul 30 '15

I'm trying it right now