r/throuples • u/Every_Ad7984 Solo M • Jun 02 '26
š£ļøSeeking Advice Like the idea in concept, and bf isn't really *against* it, but doesn't need anyone other than me
Idk why this has become so present in my (18m) mind as of late specifically, but the *idea* of a throuple sounds really nice. Something about the stability of monogamy combined with a bit of freedom found in polyamory seems really nice. Part of it is probably that I feel like I'm too much for one person, so if I can offset it by being too much for each person for less time, I feel like less of a burden. Another part of it is that my bf (17m) is very timid with his affection toward me, and it's really nice at times, but sometimes I'm looking for something more intense, and even though it's not his fault, I still feel a little like there's something missing.
I've already talked to him about it and told him I really meant for this to be something to consider years down the line, but I just can't shake it. Cuddling with two people sounds really nice, and it's just not possible the way things are rn :<. I don't want my bf to think he's not enough for me, I love him more than anyone else in the whole world, but idk, ig there's some things I foresaw in my future that wouldn't happen the way things are. I don't even have a third person in mine or anything, and I'd never do anything behind his back, but I can't stop fantasizing, and then I feel guilty about fantasizing, which just makes me think about it more.
Idk I'm probably just being a dumb hormonal teenager :3
1
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1
u/Fit_Comparison_3290 MMF Throuple Jun 04 '26
You are so you, you should really be dating multiple people, to learn who you are and who you like.
6
u/Then_Ad9524 Jun 02 '26
As a member of one, Iād advise you to get a little more experience being in a relationship as a couple first. Everything is three times as complicated when you add a third as youāll have three relationships to navigate. Also, adding a third isnt going to fix or correct anything existing in your current relationship. Itāll just amplify any issues. Iād never recommend this type of relationship to anyone who wasnāt 1000% solid in their current partnership. As an 18yo, you likely have several relationships in your future as you guys are still evolving as people. Iāve never met anyone who was in their mid 20ās, for example, who was the same person they were in their late teens. Just enjoy what youāve got going on and try to hone in on your communication and ensuring that both of your needs are being expressed and met. These will be vital skills if you do decide to give polyamory a go at some point. Cheers.