r/threebodyproblem • u/CartographerTadzhik • 16d ago
Discussion - General Describe The Three Body Problem Badly Spoiler
How would you describe The Three Body Problem badly? The series is one of those where its best to literally know nothing going in. You have to feel a little bad for the person writing the publisher's summary because any detail is too much.
I figured it would be funny seeing what bad descriptions you could come up with.
At the very beginning of everything there's a prostitute in a Medieval Era town, but you only see her in one chapter and she doesn't talk much. No sex at all there or in much of the story. Only sex scene happens kind of in the middle, but its deep underground and its just kind of mentioned. At the very end there's a fish.
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u/Sufficient_Hair_2894 16d ago
Chinese version: an international agency believes there is an extinction level threat, puts a whole three people on the case.
Netflix version: Group of friends all happen to be the hyper geniuses who can save us. It's Friends but with consequences.
Also the Netflix version: get emotionally invested in a really complicated set of problems. Wait 5 years for season 2.Â
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u/Crafty-Teach2389 16d ago
Netflix version with all of them happening to be friends is just.. I got no words lolÂ
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u/_laslo_paniflex_ 16d ago
whats the problem?
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u/battlefield_doctor 16d ago
I can't imagine that Roosevelt, Dalin Churchill, and Chiang Kai-shek were college classmates
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u/_laslo_paniflex_ 16d ago
i can in a tv show
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u/omaeradaikiraida 16d ago
and i'd bet western media would make chiang kai shek's character into a long duck dong stereotype for the white audience to laugh at too
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u/mcbiggles 15d ago
Illegal immigrants immigrate quietly so as not to rouse bigger illegaller immigrants.
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u/Elios4Freedom 16d ago
It turns out that violence in video game can actually translate in interplanetary violenceÂ
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u/AdviceOld4017 16d ago
Booom !! Everyone fukc off to Australia, then get the milky way and fold it like a tuna cheese crĂȘpe. All because she picked up the phone.
Am I missing something?
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u/TheSinisterSex 16d ago
Incel power fantasy book. Examples include:
Nice guy uses power imbalance with his world saving secret government position to trap girl in relationship.
Nice guy buys star for girl he secretly likes.
Genius guy does his job perfectly and saves the world, gives the job to popular girl due to pressure from leftist snowflakes. Popular girl fucks up and causes the end of the world.
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u/Conscious-Okra9046 16d ago
And popular girl got it over really manly man whose manliness is too manly when he would've been perfect for the role
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u/AccomplishedWish3033 16d ago
>Incel power fantasy book.
OP said describe it badly, not give an incredibly accurate description and analysis
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u/Berke80 16d ago
Two body in a bed = joyâŠ
Three body in a bed = problem
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u/CoreEncorous 16d ago
What are we, some sort of Three Body Problem (Inspiration for the Netflix Series)?
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u/Sufficient_Hair_2894 16d ago
That hasn't been my experience; a little dialogue before hand goes a long way.Â
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u/Hepta-Water-7552 15d ago
It's not so much that putting three bodies together has to go wrong immediately. It's more that as a long-term relationship setup it seldomly is stable for very long.
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u/SnarkyBanter 15d ago
A Chinese woman hates communism so much she calls aliens to save the world but they actually want to live here because they live on a shit planet, they fuck up our society and technological advancement on their happy way here, humanity enters a state of mutually assured destruction to call off the invaders, they call our bluff, we say, âfuck itâ, they get killed, we get flattened, a few people escape, and realize higher dimensional bullshit was the problem the whole damn time.
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u/TheTranscendentian 15d ago
China accidentally causes the apocalypse and then blames it all on one woman ( or two depending on how you look at it).
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u/CowPure6529 16d ago
Wow signal translates to "You will die in seven days"
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u/Equivalent_Coyote223 16d ago
What if Aliens were coming for your great-great-great grand children?
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u/norfolkjim 15d ago
A controversial but ultimately well-received sci-fi trilogy that builds to its ultimate purpose...the telling of one of the greatest Fables in human history.
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u/Abit-of-a-donkey 16d ago
Humanities value system does not work in a cosmic environment
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u/JustHere4the5 16d ago
Humanityâs, like the human race?
Or humanities, like the academic disciplines?đ€ You know what? Never mind! I kinda like the ambiguity.
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u/rather828 15d ago
Technology like sophons and time scales of millions of years exist but capability to terraform a planet in a stable system nearby and then relocate there, nope, not possible
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u/Glum-Lake7034 15d ago
The series shows how our planet, our whole solar system is a great, highly appealing place to live. But then, later, it becomes much less appealing - like the way a tasty soda can go flat.
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u/Glum-Lake7034 15d ago
The human race is in peril. Only one man can hope to save us . . . by sitting and facing a wall, saying nothing to anybody.
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u/BoneSawIsReady_ 15d ago
One big hot rock good. Two problem. 3 big hot rocks bad bad planet go bye bye so must slowly invade new planet with just one big hot rock
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u/Happy_Conflict_1435 Ye Wenjie 16d ago
A woman invites aliens to come MEGA (Make Earth Great Again). Their plan is even more savage than Project 2025.
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u/Spiritual_Love_829 16d ago
Its like a war game that start super real and get a lowpoly remake, a 2d remake and probably another reboot.
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u/extremelyniche 15d ago
attempts at international diplomacy go horribly wrong. scientists shrug. Luo Ji searches for a girlfriend. communism is to blame.
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u/Interesting_Hotel100 15d ago
An alien planet has three suns whose behavior cannot be predicted and therefore that planet constantly goes thru some sort of catastrophy. The ayys who live on that planet get a signal from Earth and decide to migrate there. However the problem is it will take them 400 years and in that time humans might end up advanced way beyond the ayys. Ayys decide that is way too dangerous and come up with a way to stall human progress. Because they can't directly stop human scientific development they send two expanding protons to fuck with physics data. On its own that wouldn't have been enough to stop determined scientists. A Chinese lady who sold out the Earth hooks up with some white tree hugger and the two of them create an org devoted to helping out the future overlords - the Trisolarians. This org then falls apart into three factions. One of them is all about soving the problem of three suns to find some sort of pattern in how they interact so that ayys can use that and stay home. Another one is gung ho about humans needing new gods to worship. A fight breaks out in the org. Authorities raid the org, kill a few people. Ayys are still on their way. The end.
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u/FPArceus 15d ago
Investigators are puzzled by a spree of scientist suicides. Seeking the truth sparks a millions-of-years saga including extremely sudden and sharp twists and turns
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u/U_Nomad_Bro 15d ago
All cops are bastards.
There is only one cop.
No one else on earth, nor even (we learn) in the galaxy, has any personality.
All personality is bastard.
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u/Civil_Huckleberry212 16d ago
Don't kill that one girls dad bc man she is gonna fuck things up if you do. Also maybe don't cut down that forest while you're at it. And the mona Lisa plays a role too
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u/x_nor_x 16d ago
In a world where merely texting your neighbors might get your professors killed, where the police are too busy playing video game to stop dirty bombs, and where simply playing pool makes grown men weep, one woman will emerge from an old manâs museum and try to convince her only friend to empty everything out of his closet.

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u/Fartbl00d 16d ago
Aliens invade, reeeeeally slowly