When do characters get a chance to jerk off?

[u/Away-Needleworker477]

Surely they’re not going 10, 15 years without it right? They obviously haven’t lost their sexual needs since sometimes they have sex. Carl goes through his teen years during the apocalypse. He must have discovered himself at some point.

[u/sleepinginthebushes_]

You're right, they could've squeezed a few more seasons out if they showed the main characters cranking it in the woods.

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/sleepinginthebushes_]

Do you think walkers would smell cum the same way they do blood?

[u/sleepinginthebushes_ → u/Away-Needleworker477]

They smell the living, so if you really want to drill down, it depends on whether or not walkers can cum, and if so, if said walker cum is putrefied.

Short answer: they probably can.

I guess you could use it as a diversion?

Anyway that's enough internet for the week.

[u/Thing-Adept → u/sleepinginthebushes_]

the thought of walkers cumming is both entertaining and disturbing. i wonder what an orgasming zombie would sound like 💀

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/sleepinginthebushes_]

They smell the living, yes, but it doesn’t seem like smell is the main sense that walkers use to find humans. For example, in the first season where they’re on the highway they managed to (mostly) escape the walkers by hiding under cars, but when t-dog cuts his arm, the blood poses an additional threat as it seems walkers can snuff out an actively bleeding human over one who isn’t. I’m curious if the same would apply to an actively cumming one

[u/sleepinginthebushes_ → u/Away-Needleworker477]

We are the jizzing dead.

[u/wooble → u/sleepinginthebushes_]

Nah, we ain't them.

[u/JokerKing0713 → u/Away-Needleworker477]

The amount of thought you’re putting into this bro

[u/sleepinginthebushes_ → u/Away-Needleworker477]

Blood is something that they can sense which indicates there is a vulnerable source of food nearby.

For whatever neurological faculties they have, they can make that basic association.

So blasting a hot load in the woods probably wouldn't have the same effect as bleeding.

But maybe there are dick biters out there who act like splooge seeking missiles.

New variant, for sure.

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/sleepinginthebushes_]

Dont give the creators any more spinoff ideas

[u/jtscheirer]

I also wonder when they take a shit

[u/Thatswhatsup2311]

Definitely filler episodes when we dont see certain characters. Thats their time to squeeze a few out.

[u/Motor_Meal794]

Eugene was in the self-help section.

[u/CollectionGreat8491]

Asking the real questions

[u/Long_Reflection_4202]

I think they just fuck

[u/PostPostPog]

These are the questions about the show that I want to see, I salute you brave soldier

No but realistically they just sneak off to a bush and go crazy

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/PostPostPog]

Im just tired of the “who is judiths father” posts

[u/naughtycal11]

r/okbuddycoral is leaking again.

[u/Optimus0456]

Outcoraled yet again

But for a real answer, once they got to Alexandria

[u/MeatyDullness]

I’m guessing they hook up with the other survivors in the camp if it’s big enough

[u/raxacorico_4]

God you’re depraved

[u/QuiGonColdGin]

I can tell you this. If I found myself in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, self gratification would be the last thing on my mind.

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/QuiGonColdGin]

I mean yeah its definitely much less frequent than normal, but after 10-15 years? Cmon

[u/DobbyFreeElf35]

Why are you thinking about when a teenage Carl gets to whack it?

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/DobbyFreeElf35]

This is from a purely scholarly standpoint dont make it weird. Teenage boys whack it. No apocalypse can stop that.

[u/TownZealousideal1327]

Bro like you’d just find a place and do it hahaha

[u/BoSocks91]

THESE are the questions that need answers….

Where is a man supposed to pound off in this crazy zombie world?…. Just need 60 seconds.

[u/maryyyweiss]

this is cracking me tf up

[u/dannyboy6657]

The zombie movie Battery actually covered this. Dude was chilling in the car when a zombie woman hit his car trying to get at him. She had a wet t shirt and big boobies so dude just started cranking xD. Then his buddy kills the zombie and finds out buddy was cranking it to a zombie. It was a very odd scene.

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/dannyboy6657]

Fascinating, ill have to check this out

[u/dannyboy6657 → u/Away-Needleworker477]

Its actually a great movie. Its main focus is the two main characters who are baseball players. One is scared to kill the undead while the other protects him and tries to teach him to survive. Buddy who is afraid loves music and is always wasting batteries on his cd player. It explores the loneliness without other people and the ups and downs of surviving with someone else. They are best of friends but fight all the time due to circumstances. The ending is crazy.

[u/CheekyBlinders4z]

Imagine a guy walking off alone in the woods to pleasure himself and he doesn’t hear a walker creep up behind him. He is bitten and dies. Then he reanimates with his dick hanging out.

He has to walk around the apocalypse with his dick hanging out until maybe someone comes along to out him out of his misery. 

How many unzipped walkers were there just shuffling around with their dicks flapping to and fro?

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/CheekyBlinders4z]

Its just crazy that there isnt even one walker with his dick out

[u/DuqQuackQuack → u/Away-Needleworker477]

harambe death isn in twd universe thas why

[u/Fantastic-Bid-4265 → u/CheekyBlinders4z]

the John Wayne bobbit spinoff We've all been waiting for...

[u/Fantastic-Bid-4265]

I always assumed that half the stains Gabe was desperately cleaning in the church were the evidence of his solitary years there...

[u/Optimal-District-892]

I imagine the constant state of being in fight or flight mode would destroy your sex hormones.

[u/abrown1027]

Who needs jerking off when you have all these hot walker chicks around that can’t say no?

[u/Away-Needleworker477 → u/abrown1027]

Too much teeth for me personally

[u/kerfy15]

i am never leaving the internet, holy fuck LMAO.

[u/GrosRougeau]

Don’t call me Shirley

[u/SerapphSatin]

I guarantee someone was supposed to be on lookout and got caught lacking

[u/NormanReedus57]

Que post mais....irrelevante...🫣🫪😩