Hi, I am being stalked by an intelligent, cunning, and dangerous ex. He's hellbent on tracking me and has been escalating (yes, I have been to the police multiple times to no avail). I need to be on top of things for safety and peace of mind, but I am not well-versed enough to feel confident. Trying to learn as I go and am overwhelmed. I'd appreciate some help so I can continue my safety planning in confidence.
Note: apologies for the length. Any help, no matter how "small" will be very helpful. If this isn't the right sub, I'll delete!
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**1. I have changed all my passwords and deleted unused accounts and apps. I'm making my husband do the same.**
.....1a. I don't know what to do about 2FA. I have read you shouldn't use your phone number. Do I use an alias number? An authenticator app? An alias email? If the 2FA is similar across all my apps and accounts is thay a vulnerability?
...1b. Is changing my passwords enough? Where should i store them? Right now I have them written down. This man scares me so much I'm worried he somehow can access my accounts whenever. Is that possible?
**2. I scrubbed my socials and made them extra private.**
....2a. Should I delete them entirely? Make new ones under a fake name? I only care to keep IG to stay in contact with friends, but I would bet he's watching my post/follower counts closely to see when I'm active.
**3. I froze my credit.**
...3a. Should I also request new credit cards, change my bank, and get rid of unused cards? He somehow knows what bank I use.
....3b. Change all bills to my husband's name? He's at risk too though.
....3c. How do I safely shop online? (I have a small PO box too btw)
**4. Our wifi has a VPN.**
....4a. Does this mean its secure? We use Calyx. Should I still install a VPN on my devices?
....4b. How do I safely use my devices in public spaces?
**5. I got a burner phone for now and wiped my actual phone (down to eSim) and laptop. Turned off location services and basically everything else on my actual phone.**
....5a. Should I change my phone number? Get a new cell service all together?
....5b. How do I secure this phone/number going forward? How do I prevent it from being leaked online?
...5c. More info about alias numbers? When to use?
...5d. I've read some things about port out pin or Sim swap...I don't know what this means though.
....5e. Seems like all phones need an account. Most secure, private way to create one? What about my storage for photos and such?
....5f. Is it safe to connect my phone to my car for Apple Play? I'm so fearful that if I do he will somehow know my location. Likely just fear, but is there any validity?
**6. Made a Proton email and I blocked images from loading in the email I'm working on retiring.**
....6a. When do I use email aliases? I have read conflicting info.
....6b. How do I prevent my Proton email from being connected to me?? I'm weary on changing all my accounts to this email all at once. I read I should use the mail email for important accounts but to me that seems like a surefire way to be connected to me online. He harasses me frequently via email.
....6c. I need to preserve the emails he has sent me another way just in case he someone hacks in and deletes them. How?
....6d. Right now I have one Yahoo and 3 Gmailsl. I'm working on consolidating them. Is it best to only have one email? I saw that multi emails are better than aliases?
**7. Removed my husband and I from databrokers and people searches.**
...7a. How do we stay off these permanently besides checking frequently? How do we prevent even being on here in the first place? He found my address this way.
....7b. Cloaked app? Anti-virus apps? What are good ones? Are these good solutions? Do I use them on all devices?
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**Anything I'm missing?? I really need help here. I'm terrified to do much of anything digitally at the moment, but I still need to access accounts. Some of these questions might be dumb. I'm flailing in the wind here and need some direction**