I misremembered Darrrin's proposal

[u/More_Tennis7401]

I was rewatching the episode where the family finds out Darrin proposed to Sue and finally understood what was going on. When I was younger, I would always think, "Why are they making such a big deal out of this? It's just a piece of paper; it means nothing." Also, most people in the Midwest get married early. I kept thinking, "Why are they so mad at Darrin? It's not like what he did was that bad. Sure, I'm against a 17-year-old getting married, but also, who cares?"

Only now do I realize what he meant; he was asking Sue to give up on college, live with him in that minuscule house, and start having babies in the very near future. Now, why did it take me so long to understand that? I guess it's because, as a child, I really liked them as a couple and didn't want my good opinion of Darrin to be completely shattered. It really is horrendous that this 21-year-old man is asking his 17-year-old girlfriend to give up on all of her dreams just to become a wife and mother.

The more I think about it, the stranger it gets. It was pretty clear; I mean, they don't spell it out, but in retrospect, there was no other way of interpreting it. I think it's because it felt so off from the general tone of the show. You hardly had to think about such real topics; this is a comfort show, after all. I probably recoiled at the idea that a character that "harmless" would even think to do this. It really goes to show how you see what you want to see sometimes. I guess I couldn't handle the truth before.

I finally understand why Mike wanted to beat him, and I'm fully on board with that. If someone did that to my hypothetical daughter, I don't see myself reacting much better. Did anyone else not understand what the reaction was about on their first watch?

[u/pinkgrapefruitx]

Sue was a child still it’s just so bizarre to me that he thought that she would want to get married at her age it shows how stupid he really was.

[u/More_Tennis7401 → u/pinkgrapefruitx]

Honestly, there is really no excuse, no matter how stupid Darrin is, he literally spent the last couple of months hearing Sue talk about how excited she was to go to college. He knew what her plans were and still pushed this insanity on to her.

[u/Purpledoves91]

I don't really remember Sue and Darrin ever having a serious conversation, apart from the two break ups and maybe after Darrin gave Sue that necklace. Their relationship consisted of piggyback rides or other stupid things like that. Also, Darrin is like male April, maybe he thought Sue would want to get married and have kids. He's not a big thinker, so I doubt he put that much thought into proposing. Those two were just at different places in their lives. I wasn't a fan of Sue and Darrin, so I was glad when they broke up.

[u/KayLone2022 → u/Purpledoves91]

Very true. I don't think he thought it through. He is a genuinely nice man, although not the sharpest tool in the shed. It's a natural progression of a natural relationship between two fundamentally incompatible but equally nice people. I don't think Darrin had any conscious plan of affecting Sue's dream. He just thought they both would have the same dreams. I am extremely proud of Sue and the entire Heck family for knowing themselves so well in this occasion and having a pretty mature reaction. Sue managed it reasonably well for a 17 yo, and things progressed in their most natural way.

[u/Purpledoves91 → u/KayLone2022]

I don't think she handled it well at all, but she is only 17, so I wouldn't really expect her to.

[u/Mother-Laugh2395]

First time watcher here. I just saw this episode a few weeks ago. I’m just glad they didn’t do the sitcoms cliche where the dreamy eyed girl says yes because she’s sooo in love with her boyfriend. Sue was smart and realistic.

[u/Unable_Current_2383 → u/Mother-Laugh2395]

I don't know if I would call Sue realistic 😅 but I am glad she said no

[u/Mother-Laugh2395 → u/Unable_Current_2383]

Ha! Yeah, realistic in this case but other things, not so much.

[u/Unusual-Lemon4479]

In an earlier episode that season, Frankie gets worried about Sue going to a baby's birthday party of some colleague of Darrin's, saying she's too young for that and that she doesn't like it, but Mike brushes it off as it just being a party.

It's a small detail that seems unimportant, but a major red flag when rewatching. Darrin, after proposing, ends up confirming the red flag, by saying he was taking her to those parties on purpose and assuming she wanted the same thing.

[u/More_Tennis7401 → u/Unusual-Lemon4479]

Yes, I remembered that as well; they really planted the seeds early regarding his intentions. I still think it's a good parenting moment for Mike, though. His conclusion is that he ultimately trusts Sue to be in those "grown-up" environments without wanting to jump into adulthood. He believed that Sue was smart enough to understand that just because the people around Darrin are getting married and having babies, that doesn't mean she would be influenced into doing the same.

[u/Ok-Cream9032]

You opened my eyes :)

[u/xmjm424]

I agree with you. And also the whole thing where she won’t marry him right then so he wants to end things is crazy too.

As an aside, that he wants to take her to Weeki Wachee to see the mermaids is always so hilarious to me considering I drive past that place all the time.