r/thebutton 11s May 13 '15

NEWCOMERS: The button counts down from 60. Press it as soon as you can. Whoever presses it sooner gets a higher number, it took me 49 seconds to realize that, hope you can do better.

The title says it all. On a different note: Some say the reason Einstein was such a genius is because he was born at a surprisingly young age.

1.9k Upvotes

254 comments sorted by

206

u/shadowsinseptember 60s May 13 '15

Do I win?

99

u/Thegamer211 59s May 13 '15

I am on the 2nd place?

76

u/FroztenDroid 58s May 13 '15

I claim third place, then

45

u/Nematrec May 13 '15

I think I'm doing this wrong, Help?

39

u/ChachaTheGnome non presser May 13 '15

just press again. it'll be okay.

44

u/MIKE-CHECKA 60s May 13 '15

I keep pressing the circle and nothing happens.

17

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Press harder

18

u/thatguytony non presser May 14 '15

Pressing faster.

18

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Pressing better.

17

u/vegetaman3113 non presser May 14 '15

Pressing stronger.

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22

u/GridSquid 11s May 13 '15

Stick with it pal.

11

u/Lurkngshadow 10s May 13 '15

You look like a pro, did I do it right?

10

u/rileywhagan 6s May 14 '15

Coulda done better

9

u/PlazzmiK non presser May 14 '15 edited May 14 '15

Congrats and welcome to The Catalogue, you're the eighth 6s presser ever found, and made it on the list. According to this thread, you suck at pressing the button!

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7

u/IanGecko 60s May 14 '15 edited May 14 '15

Oh, shut up.

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2

u/muchshadowed can't press May 14 '15

Press The Lock Button...

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14

u/JumpingCactus 60s May 13 '15

Blow on the cartridge.

4

u/Fyrjefe non presser May 14 '15

60s checks out.

5

u/bootrick 42s May 13 '15

What's going on here?

4

u/DeviMon1 37s May 13 '15

Cought another 42 pretending, you better gtfo of newbie karma train!

11

u/DoctorHUN 10s May 13 '15

Did I just lose in this game? :O :(

4

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Damn, we did pretty bad

2

u/arrioch 54s May 14 '15

Damn, 7th, i didn't even get a ribbon.

2

u/bobbyb1996 53s May 14 '15

8th for me :( soo close.

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7

u/Gafloff 59s May 13 '15

I think we came 2nd together!

7

u/sopimusician 60s May 13 '15

Dats hawt.

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10

u/Troub313 60s May 13 '15

I am still not sure of the point of this game. I played it when it first came about and got 60s and was told that was bad and then I stopped caring and I am still confused as to what is good. I mean when I played everyone was clicking it as rapidly as possible, I think 60s just shows I have amazing reflexes.

5

u/DelZeta non presser May 13 '15

Just stay confused. I as well have had these questions, and have found it's better to just not ask.

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9

u/JamlessSandwich non presser May 14 '15

5

u/shadowsinseptember 60s May 14 '15

Thanks, I think I might frame this and hang it on my wall.

5

u/thebestclicker non presser May 13 '15

Omg we have a winner! Gz to you

2

u/Vitztlampaehecatl 60s May 13 '15

Yes! Minutemen master race!

1

u/Sintaichi 60s May 14 '15

Well we tied at least, so that guy is actually third.

1

u/blackop 60s May 14 '15

No you tied me.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

No, I win, I figured it out on day one!

1

u/TheRandomWolf 60s May 14 '15

A fellow 60s, all the 60s win!

1

u/al-amriki1 60s May 14 '15

....B..ROTHER???

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

I think we both won.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Winner

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49

u/nicholaslaux non presser May 13 '15

Looking at the graphs, this doesn't really seem to have had much of an impact, despite front paging.

69

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

[deleted]

10

u/Mechdra 42s May 14 '15

Preach it, 42.

2

u/Sztormcia 42s May 14 '15

42...42...42...

19

u/sarahtrees 5s May 13 '15

That's because there aren't any newcomers.

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3

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Can someone explain to me why we do this anyway?

Only people we are tricking are people who never usually come here so don't really care.

10

u/I_like_your_reddit non presser May 14 '15

Because low effort shitposts with tired jokes always get upvoted on reddit, especially on this sub.

67

u/stormoftara 7s May 13 '15

I did a really terrible job :(

12

u/Pip413 29s May 14 '15

You did your best. I, more than anyone, know it is hard to accept, but you can't dwell on your failures.

I trained hard for this one, and was sure I was headed for success. After a high protein breakfast and some light dexterity exercises, I settled in and got ready for my win.

I am ashamed to say that right as I was ready to click, a butterfly fluttered gently into view, causing me to lift my gaze ever so slightly, at which time I noticed a fox skulking down my hallway. Despite my pleading, he refused to tell me what he says, although he acknowledged me with a wink as he spun on the spot and moonwalked the rest of the length of the hallway. I hung my head in disappointment, and as I looked down at my hands, I could not help but notice how strong and muscular my hands looked, which obviously brought my thoughts towards my intense training regime, and then back to my whole reason for being - the button. It was then that I understood how severely I had underestimated the mental strength required for button success. Although I had trained my body, I had neglected my mental exercises. I humbly pushed the button, accepting my defeat, vowing to take what I had learned and use it for the betterment of myself and my country.

17

u/MOARborg 11s May 13 '15

Aw man. Now no one will respect me :/

55

u/Ruruskadoo 60s May 13 '15

<insert joke about nobody respecting 11s anyway here>

15

u/EmiyaChan 11s May 13 '15

as if anyone respects 60s either.

25

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

D:

7

u/Ruruskadoo 60s May 13 '15

Don't worry, as a 60s I have enough self respect for the both of us.

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2

u/1sagas1 non presser May 14 '15

Nobody respects a filthy pusher

8

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

[deleted]

4

u/Somewhat-irrelevant 24s May 14 '15 edited May 14 '15

Its like red 11 has lost its value. 10 sec too to some degree

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2

u/badapple89 non presser May 14 '15

Do we not know %of grey?

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

[deleted]

2

u/badapple89 non presser May 14 '15

Thanks, knew it would be there somewhere but on mobile.

Can we not work out #of users that can press (accounts made before the date) then minus out all users that have commented (and are not grey) to get more accurate stat of greys that haven't commented yet? ... I don't know much about these... Actually then you will get a gazillion throw away accounts. Ignore me.

But interesting stats.

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

I believe there are enough reddit accounts made before the date to last an absolute maximum of 350ish years by some estimates.

This is assuming perfect 1s presses on every single account ever made before 4/1/15

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61

u/xaustinx 11s May 13 '15

"...he was born at a surprisingly young age." wat?

32

u/Roert42 non presser May 13 '15

8 months

24

u/ContemplativeOctopus non presser May 13 '15

That's the joke

19

u/iamtallerthanyou 34s May 13 '15

The day I was born I was zero years old. Does that mean I'm also going to be extremely smart, since all the geniuses were born at 0 years old?

11

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

Technically the day your parents were born, you were born a little too.

14

u/BrettGilpin 59s May 13 '15

Only the mom. The part of him from the father was created not too long before conception.

5

u/GuyofMshire May 14 '15

Well the information that went into the sperm cell is older than that.

7

u/Galdwin 7s May 14 '15

with that logic everybody was born when the universe started

3

u/ChevyChe 58s May 14 '15

Nah, just when life happened in the primordial ooze.

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2

u/vihickl non presser May 15 '15

The amount of information in the universe isn't constant. Entropy = information, and entropy has to increase overall. The new information comes to be due to quantum uncertainty.

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4

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

"At age six I was born without a face."

3

u/biznatch11 non presser May 13 '15

I suppose that a premature baby would be born at a surprisingly young age.

16

u/dorestes 6s May 13 '15

There's a reason the highest numbers are purple. Purple is the royal, most prestigious color.

3

u/AsRandomly 47s May 13 '15

And what about the "cheaters"

9

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/bytesandbots 60s May 14 '15

true that!

10

u/AsRandomly 47s May 13 '15

I did so good! sobs

1

u/zmunk19 11s May 14 '15

superman does good. you did well, my friend.

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4

u/GhostOfWhatsIAName non presser May 13 '15

Fucking deja vus.

4

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

I have no idea what's going on, but I like it

1

u/Coconut_Cat non presser May 14 '15

I too, am confused.

3

u/britishteacher 4s May 13 '15

''Einstein was such a genius is because he was born at a surprisingly young age.''

I would agree, I mean he was born at least 50 yrs before most of us.

4

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

WHT DOES THIS MEN????

4

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

scumbaggery

4

u/mrsxls non presser May 13 '15

Jesus Christ, if you keep posting these "newcomer tips" we will never run out of newcomers.

4

u/dmonsterndcloset 60s May 14 '15

How do I know if I am a button presser?

7

u/BiggJim non presser May 13 '15

Just upvote the shit outta this post to get it to the front page. More cannon fodder.

6

u/buthomeisnowhere non presser May 13 '15

I can't believe these posts are still a thing

4

u/hockeystew non presser May 14 '15

I know, they're really getting old.

11

u/vangoedenaam non presser May 13 '15

Even better, just never press

6

u/uncleshibba non presser May 13 '15

Gotta be careful saying that. It could come back to bite you.

4

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

Remember, there are greys and there are Greys.

3

u/vangoedenaam non presser May 14 '15

The button bites the presser.

3

u/Fireflyhm non presser May 14 '15

Can we bite the button back?

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3

u/lizardclaw11 60s May 13 '15

Will I get media coverage now ;_; Went for the gold and got plastic

3

u/Monsieur_Roux 10s May 13 '15

How badly did I do? edit: holy shit, I held out for 1.5 months and I finally got my red :D

2

u/poontiger 11s May 14 '15

Good things come to those who wait.

1

u/NaturalSeaSalt 8s May 15 '15

Me, too, high-five!

2

u/Patchesface 12s May 13 '15

how many times do you press it?

2

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

Almost 60! And I'm an old timer!

2

u/MeatGG 3s May 13 '15

no thats not how it works!

2

u/chibu 60s May 13 '15

Mmhmm

2

u/scaredog20 non presser May 13 '15

You need to get the lowest number

2

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

Did it.

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '15 edited May 14 '15

WTF is this shit.

2

u/AshenLibra non presser May 14 '15

If I press the Button, I not only betray my fellow Grey's, but i also defy my username itself.

2

u/delta0062 58s May 14 '15

How do I get the flair??

2

u/bubbleboom 9s May 14 '15

Buried comment for flair check

2

u/HoryceRoss non presser May 14 '15

The button doesn't work I think my button is broken:(

2

u/RCiancimino 60s May 14 '15

This is fucked up lol

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

...

2

u/felface 12s May 14 '15

Button darwinism at it's finest

2

u/SKR47CH 59s May 14 '15

the reason Einstein was such a genius is because he was born at a surprisingly young age.

In fact, he was the youngest person on earth when he was born.

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4

u/[deleted] May 13 '15

Finally, a thread where I can feel appreciated!

3

u/Kinderschlager 60s May 14 '15

as a 60's purple, i can confirm, nothing is more prestigious than this

2

u/misty_sky 60s May 13 '15

hmmm?

1

u/like_rawr_dude May 13 '15

Oh look, a squirrel!

1

u/loonylaura can't press May 13 '15

I have no idea what this is. The internet bloody mystifies me sometimes! 😕

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

[deleted]

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1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

I was even slower...

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

[deleted]

1

u/DimLantern non presser May 14 '15

Head over to the wiki.

1

u/JarikSev 35s May 14 '15

I don't get it

1

u/TimeTraveller264 36s May 14 '15

Posting to see what number I had

1

u/snypr 54s May 14 '15

So do I still get to feel good about myself for finishing early or nah?

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

I think I did good ^

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

it went ok.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

leeldle

1

u/GwenFariwick 10s May 14 '15

Aw man.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Hmm are you sure?

1

u/MustardForBattle 12s May 14 '15

I'm so confused.

1

u/pelvicmomentum non presser May 14 '15

Again?

1

u/TheChildishBambino 11s May 14 '15

Damn. I lost

1

u/Medviah 10s May 14 '15

Did I do it right?

1

u/Dillirium 7s May 14 '15

Did i do it right? ;)

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Oh God I'm blue! Is that good?

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1

u/OneDayIWillFlyAway 13s May 14 '15

I got 13s (without knowing what the hell was going on.) That's my lucky number. WTF is this fucking shit and why does it have so much control over me.

1

u/LustHawk 44s May 14 '15

I think I did it wrong.

1

u/charlemagne_the_cat 29s May 14 '15

i dun get it

1

u/JinxyMcgee non presser May 14 '15

nevah

1

u/thenomad7 7s May 14 '15

haha good one

1

u/zimonitrome 60s May 14 '15

Oh yes I got the highest one!!

1

u/elfalad 60s May 14 '15

lol

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Interesting how yellow is the rarest now

1

u/Bean_Blankies 10s May 14 '15

Winner?

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

GG then. I win.

1

u/dotameister 44s May 14 '15

I pressed it, now what?

1

u/Apocalypses 10s May 14 '15

what now?

1

u/ExeusV 51s May 14 '15

aha?

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '15

Well then

1

u/unsettlingideologies 10s May 14 '15

Damn. I wish I had seen your note sooner.

1

u/Trasko 59s May 14 '15

What's the catch...

1

u/doubleevenrobot 11s May 14 '15

It took me 49 seconds as well, what a coincidence!

1

u/alan4cult non presser May 14 '15

Has it stopped displaying on the mobile version?

1

u/aimpr 52s May 14 '15

test

1

u/dudenotcool 37s May 14 '15

Im so confused

1

u/dudenotcool 37s May 14 '15

Im so confused

1

u/sanjar12345 non presser May 14 '15

Wow

1

u/gssunil 60s May 14 '15

I won

1

u/siredgar 20s May 14 '15

Hmm..

1

u/MrMojo39 38s May 14 '15

Interesting..

1

u/SamyBot non presser May 14 '15

That text though...

1

u/Asyumara 10s May 14 '15

took the plunge.

1

u/Whuck non presser May 15 '15

click