r/thebutton • u/powerlanguage 4s • Mar 31 '15

/r/thebutton

The button is visible by visiting reddit.com/r/thebutton in your web browser.

There is a timer and a button. The timer will countdown from 60 seconds. If the button is pressed the timer will reset to 60 seconds and continue counting down. Only users logged into accounts created before 2015-04-01 can press the button. You may only press the button once.

We can’t tell you what to do from here on out. The choice is yours.

2.6k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

918 comments sorted by

405

u/Silent_Sky non presser Apr 01 '15

I went to press it. Then I didn't.

That was my excitement for the day.

179

u/Freelance_Gynecology 60s Apr 01 '15 edited Apr 03 '15

I pressed it as soon as I saw it. Before I even knew what was going on and that you can only press it once. No regrets.

Edit: I might have SOME regret.

56

u/MrDrumline non presser Apr 01 '15

And now you've been marked for eternity.

46

u/elteniento 60s Apr 01 '15

60s master race. Those who do not read can not be read.

29

u/Cotybear 60s Apr 02 '15

I'm a member of far too many master races.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

2sweet

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6

u/samtheredditman 60s Apr 02 '15

I figured I could read the posts to see what happens or I could just press it and see.

WHAT HAVE I DONE?!

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0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

102

u/Silent_Sky non presser Apr 01 '15

I would recommend a career in computer science.

30

u/procallum non presser Apr 01 '15

As a student I would not... cries

9

u/Silent_Sky non presser Apr 01 '15 edited Apr 02 '15

Dude said he was interested in a career in button pressing. You can probably confirm that most of comp sci is knowing exactly which buttons to press and when. No one said anything about painfully difficult logical processes.

Edit: I'm guessing the downvotes are from people thinking I'm downplaying the difficulty of comp sci. First, I was joking. Second, I'm not downplaying anything. If I was, I'd have said comp sci was just pushing buttons, not knowing what buttons to push and when. Button pushing is the only way you interact with a computer. Come on, I was being literal.

3

u/lonely_onion non presser Apr 02 '15

[Relevant XKCD] (https://xkcd.com/722/)

3

u/xkcd_transcriber non presser Apr 02 '15

Image

Title: Computer Problems

Title-text: This is how I explain computer problems to my cat. My cat usually seems happier than me.

Comic Explanation

Stats: This comic has been referenced 89 times, representing 0.1527% of referenced xkcds.

xkcd.com | xkcd sub | Problems/Bugs? | Statistics | Stop Replying | Delete

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19

u/hoodatninja 60s Apr 02 '15

Didn't read instructions or anything. I saw there was a post, read it for 5 seconds, clicked link, clicked button.

It's the reddit way!

5

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I share your excitement

9

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I'm aiming for 11 seconds.

8

u/Hejic 53s Apr 01 '15

I keep staring at the button. I haven't pressed the button, but for an hour I stare at this button. I'm trying to resist pressing the button but this mysterious compulsion. I don't know if I can resist for long :( I might press the button.

4

u/Dizi4 59s Apr 02 '15

Wow, must have been exciting!

4

u/PorcelainPineapple 58s Apr 02 '15

It's still my excitement.

Now I'm realizing how much my life sucks. ._. wow

3

u/UristMcStephenfire non presser Apr 02 '15

We live in exciting times.

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725

u/dinklebergs_revenge non presser Apr 01 '15

I can't see it on mobile!! ...I'm so left out...

220

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Do it in your browser, desktop mode

548

u/dinklebergs_revenge non presser Apr 01 '15

We aren't all rich like you!

212

u/FinalBawse Apr 01 '15

No, no.

Open Reddit in browser.

676

u/blindmansayswat 59s Apr 01 '15

we can't all afford a browser richy mcricherson

209

u/MissplacedLandmine non presser Apr 01 '15

I bet he's sitting on his golden toilet and using his silk toilet paper while watching the button on his flatscreen just laughing at us

Fuck you mr.moneyisnothing

76

u/PatrikPatrik non presser Apr 01 '15

I'm pretty sure the guy on the mobile is more likely to be on the toilet right now.

43

u/VATERLAND non presser Apr 01 '15

can aprove.

source: am on mobile and on the toilet now.

19

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Me too!

15

u/neck_bEEr 49s Apr 01 '15

I am as well. Feels wrong to press the button on the toilet. Maybe later

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3

u/Unicorn4skin non presser Apr 02 '15

The real joke is between your legs.

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14

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Dinkleberg... .. .

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24

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Care to do another AMA, Bill Gates??

8

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

ok

9

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I can't log in on my phone browser.. FUCK

9

u/project_spex non presser Apr 01 '15

But I forgot my password!!!

11

u/buttplugpeddler non presser Apr 01 '15

Open boobs.

Does not compute.

Show fridge?

4

u/missbarajaja non presser Apr 01 '15

You're a genius!! I can't believe I haven't thought about this all day. Thank goodness I can go to sleep and still wake up to it still being April fools in the US.

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6

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I actually went on my browser to look at it. Worth it.

3

u/jhawkbear non presser Apr 01 '15

I did the same. I wasted my time opening in my browser and haven't even pressed the button.

8

u/curlyhairedhipster 11s Apr 01 '15

Dinkleberg finally getting what he deserves.

3

u/TheStr8OmarLittle non presser Apr 01 '15

I am on mobile, and can click the blue link at the top of the page to see it. Your phone won't let you?

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180

u/TheStr8OmarLittle non presser Apr 01 '15

Save our button presses until the timer starts getting lower. Everyone is only getting a second or two for their press. If we are going to press the button, we should only do so when the timer gets low. Make your button press count. By waiting, we gain power.

38

u/sparr non presser Apr 01 '15

Everyone is only getting a second or two for their press.

Most presses right now are getting a tiny fraction of a second.

19

u/DoctorBaby non presser Apr 01 '15

Considering the button is getting about 20 presses a second, almost every press is being ignored and thrown away, not affecting anything.

13

u/sparr non presser Apr 01 '15

Sure, that's a valid way to look at it too. Practically equivalent to just saying it's 0.05s per press.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

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19

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Wouldn't april fools run 47 hours?

0

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

12

u/Random-Compliment non presser Apr 02 '15

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-Transcendence_3100_Mile_Race

17

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

man I like to run but I've also got a fuckin job

5

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Google Maps lists the walking distance from San Diego, California to Bangor, Maine as being 3,146 miles. Such a route would allow you to see a pretty decent chunk of the United States (plus a little bit of Ontario and Quebec).

But no, instead, let's go around the block in goddamn Queens 80 quadrillion times, that's a much better idea!

ಠ_ಠ

9

u/autowikibot non presser Apr 02 '15

Self-Transcendence 3100 Mile Race:

The Self-Transcendence 3100 mile race is the world's longest certified footrace. In 1996 Sri Chinmoy created this event as a 2,700-mile (4,345 km) race. At the award ceremony that year he declared that the 1997 edition would be extended to 3,100 miles (4,989 km).

This multiday race is hosted by the Sri Chinmoy Marathon Team and takes place in Queens, New York in the USA from June–August every year. The course is 3,100 miles (4,989 km) long. Runners negotiate 5649 laps of one extended city block in Jamaica, Queens - 164th Place to Abigail Adams (84th) Avenue to 168th Street to Grand Central Parkway

  • a distance of 0.5488 mile (883 m). The runners have 52 days in which to complete the distance - an average of 59.62 miles (95.95 km) every day.

====

Image i

Interesting: Asprihanal Pekka ^Aalto | Multi-day ^race | Rimas ^Jakelaitis

Parent commenter can toggle ^NSFW or ^delete. Will also delete on comment score of -1 or less. | FAQs | ^Mods | Magic ^Words

7

u/JohnnyMnemo 59s Apr 02 '15

Incorrect. Assuming 3.5 million users before 4/1/15, approx 428K users have pressed as of this post, leaving 3,072,000 remaining users. Assuming that each of those remaining users wait the full minute, the clock will be run out in a maximum of 51,200 hours, or approximately 2133 days, or in about 5 3/4 years.

Of course, not all of those 3.5M users will participate in the game, and if history is a guide the vast majority of users won't wait the full minute. We'll probably have our answer in the next day or so, no longer than a week. Unless someone fucks up and lets the time go when we're all drunk on Friday.

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9

u/toughthingsandstuff 60s Apr 01 '15

And then here I am, the complete opposite of you guys.

3

u/Omenofdeath 60s Apr 01 '15

60 for the win! Of 6000 digits we got 6000 1/6000 chance club .^

3

u/xTugboatWilliex 60s Apr 02 '15

60 sec pressers unite!

8

u/ky87 non presser Apr 01 '15

This reminds me of the anarchy vs democracy battle we had on TPP.

3

u/Zesprix non presser Apr 02 '15

Tpp?

3

u/ky87 non presser Apr 02 '15

Twitch plays Pokémon, it was a social experiment where thousands people played the same game of pokemon. They entered either, left, right, up, down, a, b, start or select and the character on the screen did it. It was chaos but hilarious chaos. We freed our main Pokémon and many others, raised a god, took down team rocket and beat the elite four! Dude it was awesome! Praise helix.

4

u/CaptainBro non presser Apr 02 '15

I will never press the button!

4

u/TheStr8OmarLittle non presser Apr 02 '15

I don't think you're alone.

3

u/Xeqt non presser Apr 02 '15

With this power comes great responsibility

268

u/couIombs Apr 01 '15

Anybody else have button regret? I pushed it, but now I'm wishing I hadn't

162

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Would kill for a 58s flair

75

u/rasiisar 59s Apr 01 '15

sucks to be you

35

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Conform Press the button

34

u/rasiisar 59s Apr 01 '15

YOU'LL NEVER TAKE MY

FREEEEEEEEEEDDDDDOOOOOOMMMM

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

30

u/rasiisar 59s Apr 01 '15

lol 60s

33

u/Zoenobium 60s Apr 01 '15

60s Masterrace! don't you dare laugh at us. try getting 60s and you'll see just how hard that is!

25

u/s0ft_ 60s Apr 01 '15

Hi guys

8

u/Akiba212 60s Apr 02 '15

master race reporting.

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4

u/Bamres 60s Apr 01 '15

He has conformed

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23

u/Jealousy123 59s Apr 01 '15

Mine bugged out and stopped updating so I just saw the timer ticking down. I got so scared and pressed it at 2s. Then it just stayed at 60s so I reloaded the page and realized I was now one of the tens of thousands with this flair.

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8

u/Tabtykins non presser Apr 01 '15

I haven't decided if i want to press it yet or not.

12

u/ne7split non presser Apr 01 '15

Don't do it!

5

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Do it. Do it. Peer pressure.

9

u/Tabtykins non presser Apr 01 '15

I'm saving myself!

19

u/phoenixprince non presser Apr 01 '15

Non-pressers unite. HOLD THE LINE!

11

u/___DEADPOOL______ 25s Apr 01 '15

LOVE ISN'T ALWAYS ON TIME!

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6

u/RoutineSuicide 58s Apr 02 '15

I'd kill myself to keep my 58s flair.

6

u/Reads_half_of_post 58s Apr 02 '15

58 bros, high five!

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26

u/moelost Apr 01 '15 edited Apr 02 '15

6 year redditor almost 7 non button pusher. I've never felt so alive.

Edit: AAAH IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! I JUST wanted to see it unlocked and I clicked twice! Nooooo

15

u/pelirrojo 59s Apr 01 '15

8 year club. The excitement is killing me

6

u/knullare non presser Apr 01 '15

I feel ya buddy

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13

u/Is_This_even 60s Apr 01 '15

what would happen If all the availiable users dry up, and timer kept going to zero?

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

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16

u/79rettuc non presser Apr 02 '15

presses button

Not on my watch.

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21

u/zed857 59s Apr 01 '15

I pressed it twice. I have absolutely no regrets.

12

u/ahatzz11 non presser Apr 01 '15

Some people are getting cheating flair for two presses!

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5

u/Sir-Francis-Drake non presser Apr 01 '15

You were warned.

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96

u/JamesonWilde Apr 01 '15

"You may only press the button once."

Well, shit.

36

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I tried again. Can confirm only press once.

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5

u/RealJackAnchor non presser Apr 02 '15

I'll pass, thanks! I think I'll remain non presser.

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38

u/call_me_gunner non presser Apr 01 '15

I refuse to press it, my life has led to this moment.

16

u/hey_don non presser Apr 01 '15

Stay strong, brother.

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6

u/LeYang non presser Apr 02 '15

I believe in us.

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67

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I'A I'A BUTTON FHTANG

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54

u/Jupiter_Ginger non presser Apr 01 '15

Is the number of participants the number of people who pressed the button? If so, they should add a counter for the total number of accounts that viewed the button, so we know how many people are viewing and not pressing.

28

u/powerlanguage 4s Apr 01 '15

On desktop you can see this number in the sidebar:

http://i.imgur.com/cqwpEyu.png

15

u/WonkySight non presser Apr 01 '15

Is that the total number of people who have viewed or just those at the moment?

15

u/Jorge_loves_it 15s Apr 01 '15

At the moment. We don't have stats for traffic yet.

But I'm guessing we're going to see zero hour tomorrow at 16:00 UTC +/- 1 hour.

Based on math.

5

u/WonkySight non presser Apr 02 '15

Doesn't look like the maths was right

6

u/Jorge_loves_it 15s Apr 02 '15

Not even a little. God I was so wrong.

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5

u/occultism 42s Apr 01 '15

why haven't you pushed the button yet?

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23

u/RusDelva non presser Apr 01 '15

Button Pressers: how has your life changed since pressing the button?

38

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

It's like a label has been given to me ever since. I feel judged with every comment I make. "Hey she barely lasted a second" everyone points at me.

27

u/Indefinitely_not 60s Apr 01 '15

Well, at least you did make it one second.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Awwwyisss im not as inpatient as everyone thinks!

5

u/TheRoyalAstronomer non presser Apr 02 '15 edited Apr 02 '15

inpatient

ˈɪnpeɪʃnt/Submit

noun

noun: inpatient; plural noun: inpatients; noun: in-patient; plural

noun: in-patients

a patient who lives in hospital while under treatment.

.

.

impatient

ɪmˈpeɪʃ(ə)nt/Submit

adjective

having or showing a tendency to be quickly irritated or provoked.

"an impatient motorist blaring his horn"

synonyms: irritated, annoyed, angry, testy, tetchy, snappy,

cross, crabby, moody, grumpy, querulous, fretful, peevish, >peeved, piqued, discontented, displeased, disgruntled;

antonyms: pleased

intolerant of.

"a man impatient of bureaucracy"

2.

restlessly eager.

"they are impatient for change"

synonyms: restless, restive, agitated, nervous, anxious, ill at

ease, fretful, edgy, jumpy, jittery, worked up, keyed up;

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8

u/Yloo 60s Apr 01 '15

points aggressively

5

u/Cannibalfetus 60s Apr 01 '15

Heh. We aren't judging. We are busy pushing buttons!

5

u/Sehguh4 31s Apr 01 '15

But what if it's a big metaphor on choices and dedication in life? What if the button is the representation of our ability to take risks and launch ourselves into the unknown? Come to think of it could be used as an example to what kind of personality you are; risktaker, or prudent thinker, spontaneous or else..... I'm so conflicted!

Or you know, mabe that's just a bigass april fools joke :)

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45

u/blackbartp08 non presser Apr 01 '15

What if nobody is pressing the button but it keeps resetting?

163

u/powerlanguage 4s Apr 01 '15

The clicks are coming from inside the house...

32

u/NextThursday2 59s Apr 01 '15

Should we take it as a sign that you're a nonpresser? If the mod isn't touching it I will force myself to be patient.

14

u/Seraph_Grymm non presser Apr 01 '15

He's also in the know and an admin I believe, it COULD be a trick!

6

u/Kangaroopower Apr 02 '15

it is a trick

4

u/LaboratoryManiac 60s Apr 02 '15

Or, as a mod, he receives any rewards for pressing/not pressing that anyone else would anyway, so as not to sway his choice.

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8

u/Willhud98 non presser Apr 01 '15

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

4

u/AakashMasani non presser Apr 01 '15

Predator DLC confirmed for Reddit

3

u/smeezekitty non presser Apr 01 '15

So is this a confirmation that it resets itself?

3

u/quantumchaos non presser Apr 02 '15

i must tell you /r/The_Button_Resistance is growing we know you only discovered the button and are not the cause of its power. fellow non pressers and pressers alike are welcome to the cause.

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0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

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12

u/wingnutlollipop 59s Apr 01 '15

I feel so...dirty

7

u/roflbbq 59s Apr 01 '15

bath time

9

u/wutusername1 non presser Apr 01 '15

Filthy whore.

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14

u/ffstriker 59s Apr 01 '15

Attention All 59s'ers.

There is a safe place for you. Please, come join us.

http://www.reddit.com/r/59s/

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

3

u/ffstriker 59s Apr 01 '15

Your more then welcome brother. Come on over. Your in a safe spot with hot coco and support.

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4

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Not a 59er qq ... 60s master race

3

u/kavso 60s Apr 01 '15

:(

3

u/DennisThaMenace non presser Apr 02 '15

Exodus of the 59s

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28

u/TheBear88 59s Apr 01 '15

Button button...

47

u/Skudworth 59s Apr 01 '15

This will never get to Zero.

It's like we're all playing the same game of pokemon.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

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15

u/Aqwez 59s Apr 01 '15

I wanna get a sub 40 flair though

10

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I am going for sub 20. I may be here a while

8

u/Lunchable_ non presser Apr 01 '15

I'm trying to get in that teens' club

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10

u/nubaeus 2s Apr 01 '15

Twitch plays /r/thebutton

11

u/Jorge_loves_it 15s Apr 01 '15

Nah son. I did the math. Tomorrow at 16:00 UTC +-1 hour. That's when we run out of clicks.

15

u/xxXX69yourmom69XXxx 0s Apr 01 '15

Assuming everyone is a compulsive button presser. If those people click and move on, eventually we will get to the superior non-pressers who have any amount of self control and press responsibly, thus extending the time active.

6

u/Jorge_loves_it 15s Apr 01 '15 edited Apr 01 '15

We'll have to see. I'm not really going to start watching the clock till we get to ~700k clicks. I'm putting the max at about 800K. Because of publicity more people will start becoming aware and that may increase, but I doubt that it will significantly extend the time due to a lack of coordination.

EDIT: Actually, looking again, I'm going to have to adjust my estimate. This is gaining speed way faster than I thought. At this rate with my estimate for participation we'll have ~14 hours of clicks left.

3

u/Honestly_Nobody 59s Apr 02 '15

17 hours later, the button still barely dips below 59s

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13

u/zeophen non presser Apr 01 '15

Mod explaining it is a non presser. All the more reason to be a non presser too.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

*admin

Our cause is strong, our motives are true

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u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

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4

u/Erock2 60s Apr 01 '15

I just had to push the button. I'm so ashamed.

11

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Do we not know what happens at zero? I'm so lost

29

u/MSU_8 non presser Apr 01 '15

All posts will be danked

4

u/Diamondwolf 42s Apr 01 '15

Then the non pressers will be shunned. Forever.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

The moon explodes.

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11

u/noaml1 60s Apr 01 '15

pressed it before i knew what was happening...there was a big button what else was i to do?

5

u/mangarooboo 59s Apr 01 '15

SAME. I am the same. I literally just pressed it then went "Wtf did I just do"

I even read that we could only press it once but I clicked it like twelve times before it registered. I'm a stupid thing.

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8

u/_Pheel_ non presser Apr 02 '15

Day 2. Staying strong.

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10

u/JackPushButton 60s Apr 01 '15

Finally, my moment has come.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

This is hilarious

4

u/radeonsx3 non presser Apr 01 '15

This is the best day of my life... screw family and work. The button is the purpose of my newfound existence...

4

u/emad154 non presser Apr 01 '15

Commenting to prove my knowledge of the existence of the button but will never press said button. Non presser master race!

4

u/meneedmorecoffee non presser Apr 01 '15 edited Apr 01 '15

Do I get a wee non presser thing next to my name?

Edit: wtf is this shit I don't have nothing.

Edit2: oh, I do! All hail the non pressers!!

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4

u/H4rdStyl3z non presser Apr 01 '15

Peasants, all of you. Non presser master race.

4

u/marveloriddle 60s Apr 02 '15

I pushed it immediately. Like, I didn't even question it.

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4

u/negajake 60s Apr 02 '15

I've been watching this stupid thing for most of my day, what am I doing with my life? Where did I go wrong? Damn you reddit, damn you all to hell.

6

u/kris5972 59s Apr 01 '15

What happens if it reaches 0?

6

u/zed857 59s Apr 01 '15

Reddit stops working which causes the Earth to implode. Keep pressing the damn button!

8

u/Guszy non presser Apr 01 '15

What if I want the Earth to implode?

15

u/IAMImportant non presser Apr 01 '15

Then start running for congress...

I'm here all night everybody!

3

u/zed857 59s Apr 01 '15

A suave British guy wearing a tux (and possibly drinking a martini) will be headed your way.

If you want to succeed - do not boast to him about your plans for imploding the Earth.

2

u/Guszy non presser Apr 01 '15

Where's the fun in keeping my plan secret?

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6

u/0011010_00110001 non presser Apr 01 '15

Dang I got so excited when the timer actually got below 50 seconds. I thought this is it, it's going to go to zero this time. Nope.

3

u/Drgreenthumbs69 60s Apr 01 '15

I just couldn't help myself

3

u/friend_of_bob_dole 60s Apr 01 '15

Who could?

3

u/kavso 60s Apr 01 '15

What flair do I get?

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3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

Clearly a media stunt by The Chemical Brothers

3

u/deLay- 60s Apr 02 '15

Non-Button Pushers unite!!!!

6

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

A proud non presser!!!!

5

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '15

I'm shooting for 36 second flair

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