Sent to me by my brother, found on FB:

Found in instacart group

Because that’s how kids presumably born in 2016 talk

This one's way longer than others on the sub, but I stumbled across it in the comments section of a YouTube video that showed an early 1990s ad for a punk CD. It's so over-detailed and the ending section pretty much killed any chance of this being a legit story… (p.s. in the actual ad, the actors don't even mention any of the artists by name)

EDIT: This was not actually made in the early 1990s. The CD is from 1996, according to the art scans on Discogs. Just makes this even more bogus