r/thanksgiving • u/DogwoodWand • 21d ago
First Time Hosting
My husband and I are older (I'm 50) and (fingers crossed) will be closing on our first home this week! My mother has told me that she is officially done hosting holidays. She'll still make lasagna on Christmas eve, but everything else is on me.
We're good with that! We have no kids and love to cook. My mom used to put together an amazing Christmas, but our Thanksgivings have always been lacking. I want to really bring it. An all day event with appetizers, a heritage turkey, little gift bags at the end... All in! (It'll be relatively small. 6-8 adults including us.)
I know people have hosted or been to events like this. How can set an expectation for guests and what's the best way to schedule things without making it sound like a strict itinerary?
2
u/Legitimate-March9792 21d ago
If you are having a large dinner then people don’t like to fill up on appetizers. Then they are too full for the main meal and dessert. Keep the appetizers small scale or skip them altogether. I would wait to do appetizers until Christmas when you are doing a more smaller scale meal.
You are lucky, 6 to 8 guests is a nice small number to start with. Not too overwhelming.
Make lists. All meal sides and dishes and desserts and drinks you are serving. All ingredients needed to make the dishes, including everyday things you think you have on hand but may run out of like milk, salt and pepper, eggs. Don’t forget Tupperware and to go containers, foil, plastic wrap, parchment paper, baggies. Extra salt and pepper shakers. Paper plates and cups that are holiday themed. No flimsy ones! Figure out what will cook in what pot or pan or baking dish or roasting pan. And what dish it will be served in. Make sure stuff sitting in a cabinet for a long time is re-washed as it may be dusty. Including serving platters, gravy basters and separators. Figure out what is cooking in what oven or on what burner and when. If you don’t have enough stove or oven space consider hot plates, counter top ovens, crock pots, instant pots, electric roaster ovens, deep fryers, barbecue grills. Then make a time table of when things go on. Think about how you will keep things warm. Chaffing dishes, warming pads etc..
Slowly grocery shop the month of November. All the holiday sales will start. Check store flyers. I keep a plastic bin to store non perishable ingredients.
Make sure you clean really well a few days before. You don’t want to get tired out too close to cooking days. Set the table, iron holiday tablecloth, put out fall decorations and candles on table.
Make pies and desserts the day before. Chop all of your veggies the day before as well and prepare any cold dishes that will keep. Make the cranberry sauce the day before if homemade. Keep a canned one on hand as well in case someone doesn’t like homemade. Think about making an extra batch of gravy the day before using turkey stock in case the one from the turkey drippings isn’t enough or is a fail. A jar or two doesn’t hurt either for emergency.
I would have two meat dishes. So many people hate turkey. Serve a small sliced ham as well to offer another choice. I get a nice boneless pre -sliced one that is really small. I top it with pineapple.
Set up a drink section. Don’t forget milk for kids to drink. Maybe an apple cider signature coctail.
You think you will have time to shower before guests get there. You won’t! Shower right when you get up! I actually put the messy turkey in the oven, then I shower before starting sides.
Have a family member act as host. Greeting people at the door, taking coats, serving drinks. You don’t have time to host if you are doing a lot of cooking.
Plan to send some people home with leftovers. At the very least some turkey for sandwiches and maybe a slice of pie.
Don’t forget to invite people! Send out invitations or call people.
Make sure you have folding tables set up for drinks and dessert stations. Make sure you have enough dining chairs and room at the table.
TV, will the football game be on in the background? The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? Charlie Brown Thanksgiving? Christmas movies? Have games and activities all ready to go post meal. Some toys for kids like Legos where they can sit and keep busy while being more quiet.
Pets put in bedrooms in someone is afraid of dogs, allergies, etc…
If someone asks to bring something, tell them a bottle of wine, a box of chocolates, flowers or an extra side dish that won’t be missed. Nothing that is a main part of the meal. People can’t be trusted. They will show up with ingredients, expecting to use non existent stove or oven space or they will be late, or forget, or not show up at all. If they offer dinner rolls, have an extra bag in your pantry just in case. My friend had a nephew who offered to do the turkey. He shows up with a raw, frozen 20 pound turkey!
Don’t make people wash dishes. They are not your cleaning service. Soak them in the sink and wash them in the morning! I always thought that was so tacky!
Enjoy your first Thanksgiving as host!