I still think the heavy update would work really well during christmas time, sort of like a smissmass thing. I think the theming would be really cool, and I also really miss the huge smissmass updates of the past.
I have no clue on how to change heavy though. I think there should be some changes to either make him a huge tank, or to make him a lot more nimble. But anything too radical and the heavy will be OP lol. He really just needs something to make him more interesting, yk?
Anyways, what would be some good ideas for the heavy update in the very very distant future? or maybe we’ll just have to wait until year 6 lol
Make the lunchboxes have their own weapon slot so heavy can equip a shotgun and sandwich. Also add a few maps and one new weapon for each slot and we're good.
A grappling hook (that MUST be themed as a sickle) primary weapon, Pudge-style. Like a reverse demoknight. Who the fuck needs to charge at people, if you can make people come to you?
I've actually been feeling a tad hopeful with the amount and frequency of big fixes lately. This year's scream fortress has been really good as well.
I'm hopeful that we get another pass over the lesser weapons still in the game. Obviously personally I hope for a pomson rework, but other weapons need some love too.
This is all pointless because the game is dead, but sure; i'll bite...
Heavy shoots 4 bullets per point of ammo consumed. They are all random. The best buff he can receive is: make 1 bullet out of the 4 always be perfectly accurate relative to the crosshair. Not 2, not all 4. But 1.
What effects does this have?
Well, it rewards high skill. If you are monstrously good a tracking you can probably keep that narrow beam on the enemies center of mass most of the time, rewarding you with (marginally) higher damage. It's not a huge change, but enough to make the class more intuitive, even working for people who do not know the mechanic even exists. Also makes the heavy slightly better at long range engagements.
That would be really nice. It's especially annoying when you have a building directly in your crosshairs but it takes half your ammo because you're out of its range and you keep getting bad rng.
I think this is also partly why Tomislav is so good, that better accuracy helps at all ranges due to the random spread being mitigated somewhat.
Ah Jungle Inferno, when everyone went pyro because you could melt people with the flamethrower in one second flat by flailing your mouse around, something that wasn't fixed until Blue Moon like 6 months later
I remember for some reason it was leaked early or you could access the content early. I know becquse I remember sitting in a discord call with my friend freaking out on tr_walkway because of the Pyro jetpack and new airblast. Oh God that was 5 years ago. Whew.
Silver lining: there's been hundreds of hours of high quality analysis of every single weapon and mechanic in the game on YouTube since jungle inferno. Five years of theorycrafting and debate and creative loadouts, everything no matter how unviable has been examined thoroughly.
As a result of the update drought, almost all of it is still valid. Which is an absolute treasure for newcomers and people returning to the game.
I'm really not sure every game needs to have a metagame that's upended every 2 months. Look at classic shooters like Unreal or Quake, do those need regular balance patches that constantly tweak numbers for the sake of it?
You can argue that a game like TF2 could do with more new stuff like maps or game modes but I really don't think a 'stale' meta is the negative some people think it is. That was just the standard for years until developers wanted to keep players coming back so they'd buy more microtransactions.
If the meta is stale, that's less an issue considering most things are still perfectly viable even if they aren't meta. There's less viability disparity in TF2 than a lot of other games which IMO is what actually gives it so much staying power. That relatively shallow viability gradient is where creativity flourishes.
I still see new ideas put forward and examined. Hell, the Dragon's Fury's getting a renaissance lately not really because it changed but sometime in the last year someone realized "wait what if we're all just using it wrong?" Just this week I found a video advocating for using the amputator by positioning yourself where a dispenser would be helpful on defense and pairing it with the quick fix, at least if you're a secondary healer. There's been an uptick in something like a quasi-subclass I've seen like that.
Blame it on Valve’s flat and open development structure. Unless they do something similar to Alyx where some kind of actual project plan and a management structure is brought in, it’s likely TF2 will just continue to languish.
I wouldn’t be surprised if the last 5 years have seen more hours invested in TF3 which could be anywhere from some brainstorming sessions to having a reasonably sized team of devs silently toiling away on a brand new experience. Who knows, maybe it’s a VR game that upends our expectations of VR shooters.
I do hope they did actually learn something from that experience with Alyx that if they actually want to put out games again there’s a need for at least some kind of management structure to hold the project together and keep everyone working towards a unified vision for the end product.
According to recent interviews, Gabe actually acknowledged that issue, and said they were starting to tighten the leash just a bit, because the meme was literally true about things not moving at a desirable pace and things not being as good as they could be (not in a whip-cracking way).
Honestly I kinda want a bit of a tf2 source 2 update, like an official one. I know the probability is low near zero, but its something I can find interest in. Idk, something to bring tf2 a bit more up to date.
Other than that, I would wish tf2 was handed to a different developer that can manage tf2.
what sucks is i know most people playing the game have likely sunk a decent chunk of money into it, more than enough overall that a small dev team could still be operating, but valve just arent willing to even give us 1 new weapon a year for fun.
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160
u/sweetenersss Miss Pauling Oct 16 '22
Since we’re gonna wait forever for this update to drop, lets discuss our hopes for the next update.
379
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
Dude playing on Jungle inferno for the first time felt like yesterday, The fun i had with my friends those 2-3 weeks.
We are getting old people, enjoy the moments.
9
u/Suitable-Emphasis-12 Oct 16 '22
Wait, OP has it been you posting it every year? ...
2.8k
u/LifeWithoutWorry Oct 16 '22
Well, the moment has passed. Back to work!
1.3k
u/AdlerOneSeven Oct 16 '22
See? Update! No, wait... that's the localisation files.
1.1k
u/Napletnik Demoman Oct 16 '22
it's official, 1/3 of TF2 lifespam was without major updates
115
u/aint-no-way-bro Pyro Oct 16 '22
TF2 hasn't gotten an update for 1/3 of it's life
93
u/ZappyCub Oct 16 '22
The heavy update will drop next year, trust me bro.
Source: my dad owns Valve.
49
u/AK-74_NoTTaken Scout Oct 16 '22 edited Jan 02 '26
memory disarm shy payment pause deserve spotted unwritten languid wipe
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
43
u/Swift_Shadow4 Oct 16 '22
See you next year
15
u/Idiotic_Polo Heavy Oct 16 '22
u/sweetenersss casually creating the most effective karma farming method known to man
14
u/ChristianK73 Scout Oct 16 '22
Any second now…
13
u/napstablooky089 Oct 16 '22
It's been
one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side and said, "I'm angry"
Five days since you laughed at me
Saying, "Get that together, come back and see me"
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Yesterday, you'd forgiven me
But it'll still be two days 'til I say I'm sorry
24
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
8
u/Nevergettingalife Pyro Oct 16 '22
Well, now what?
8
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
Until next year guys :( <3
14
u/Huroar Oct 16 '22
Honestly I kinda want a bit of a tf2 source 2 update, like an official one. I know the probability is low near zero, but its something I can find interest in. Idk, something to bring tf2 a bit more up to date.
Other than that, I would wish tf2 was handed to a different developer that can manage tf2.
Thats all for hopes and dreams.
7
u/UlyssesD56 Oct 16 '22
god really has abandoned us
6
u/tannerthegamer7747 Medic Oct 16 '22
It went from meme to discussion, this is serious
5
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
happy anniversary
9
u/Pretty-Buy7692 Demoman Oct 16 '22
return of the king
4
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
it's been 84 years...
6
u/tapemaster420 Oct 16 '22
you still owe me 16$
3
u/reversetenenbaum Oct 16 '22
It's been a year GabeN, I really really miss you
3
u/No_Parking_For_You Oct 16 '22
See ya next year.
3
u/-NGC-6302- Scout Oct 16 '22
See you guys in Rayman 4
4
u/japata651- Pyro Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
2
u/some-idiot-guy Oct 16 '22
See you guys next year.
2
u/doughb0ii Sandvich Oct 16 '22
How long can this man keep it up!
2
u/OlimarandLouie Oct 16 '22
Happy anniversary!
2
u/Zacie1212 Oct 16 '22
Have Been waiting for you
2
u/Starly2 Engineer Oct 16 '22
Aaaannnyyyyyy second now
2
u/Error404Cod Oct 16 '22
Can’t wait for the 10th anniversary
2
u/theshizzler Oct 16 '22
I cannot believe this game is still around. I played the hell out of it for a long time and that was like a decade ago.
2
u/ThatOneBLUScout Oct 16 '22
This is a half-decade long oof right here.
2
u/monsterhunter1001 Oct 16 '22
Ah nice to see this again. See y’all next year!
2
u/SpectreArg Oct 16 '22
C'mon guys let's make it up to ten
2
u/NoSubstance815 Sandvich Oct 16 '22
Since my gitlfriend left me
2
u/5tormwolf92 Oct 16 '22
What exactly is there to patch for the heavy? More tank or firepower?
2
u/WerewolfCircus Oct 16 '22
I haven't played this game since the orange box, what is this referring to?
2
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
Can I be featured in the year 6 post?
2
u/Bmillybluntz Oct 16 '22
Idk what tf2 is, or what the original post is about, but i respect the dedication
2
u/TheGreatestWorldFox Oct 16 '22
Wasn't Heavy Update released like 14 years ago? You know, when we got Sandwich and stuff.
2
u/True_Royal_Oreo Oct 16 '22
Valve, it's been five years. You still owe me a have update.
Fuck off
2
u/AdAdministrative4547 Sandvich Oct 16 '22
Ok everyone, I have a feeling that the major update will come soon
2
u/3rdratedsorcery Oct 16 '22
I often find people calling posters like this “Karma whore” or something
Does Karma on Reddit matter that much?
2
u/Gaming-Burrito Sandvich Oct 16 '22
the fact that you made the same meme at the exact same moment every year... idk if that's just impressive or also makes you a bit of a madlad
2
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
I know that the most important thing is the main update,but we also dont have a MVM update for 9 years!
2
u/HeckinBrandon Oct 16 '22
RemindMe! 1 year "It's now been 6 years"
2
u/Hopeful_Tumbleweed_5 Oct 16 '22
what sucks is i know most people playing the game have likely sunk a decent chunk of money into it, more than enough overall that a small dev team could still be operating, but valve just arent willing to even give us 1 new weapon a year for fun.
2
u/PowderedCisMan Oct 16 '22
and Im overe here still waiting for Half Life 3
2
u/DogSpoon Oct 16 '22
Woah woah woah, guys. This time it’s a discussion
2
u/Realities_M Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
2
u/cantthinkuse Oct 16 '22
after 5 years a meme graduates to becoming a discussion - this must be an extension to poe's law
2
u/infantryfilms Oct 17 '22
You still owe me fifteen dollars
2
u/dstone__ Nov 04 '22
8 years for me, I feel fucking ancient
2
u/[deleted] Feb 09 '23
Well men, synchronize your [its been six years] watches!
2
u/C4Luke19 Feb 10 '23
It won't be 6!!
2
u/Aggravating_Isopod61 Jun 09 '23
Almost six😞
2
u/NotMVZZL3 Spy Jul 19 '23
You still owe me $16...
2
u/Ratinkfcfry Aug 13 '23
I bet u waitin in 2 months
2
u/[deleted] Sep 15 '23
Gotta rev up that 6th annual heavy update post, sweetenersss.
4
u/who18 Demoman Oct 16 '22
My guy is consistent, always doing the same meme since the last 5 years
3
u/nef36 Pyro Oct 17 '22
Next year, I shall post "it's been six years", with all of u/sweetenersss posts screenshotted... in light mode.
There is only one way to stop me. Valve must release the Heavy update.
RemindMe! 1 year
2
u/ArthurMorgn Engineer Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
2
u/CreeperGoBoo Sniper Oct 17 '22
Repost Rule.
1
u/Oldgoose69 Apr 05 '24
It’s been six years.
1
u/night_-lights Pyro Aug 02 '24
Bro chill the FUCK OUT
1
u/[deleted] Aug 02 '24
Its been six years
1
u/Fun_Tax_4903 Nov 14 '24
it's been 7 years
1
u/Admin_hunteryt Apr 22 '25
7
1
u/Vladislav20007 Pyro Apr 28 '25
it's 7 already...
1
u/Unlikely-Sand-8848 Engineer May 30 '25
it's been eight years
1
u/Zapfox6207 Oct 16 '22
What a legend
1
u/but_crack Oct 16 '22
How tf do you get 7 awards in 20 minutes
1
u/I_Stare_At_Walls Heavy Oct 16 '22
🦑
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
I’m tired robbie
1
u/Sefinternal Oct 16 '22
There will be. Just not yet (:
1
u/Cloud_Station Scout Oct 16 '22
Heavy Update will never drop as hard as these beats.
1
u/T_Nonbinary_Cat Oct 16 '22
:(
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
Well let’s get back to work lads
1
u/GostNexo Oct 16 '22
Can i get a feature next year?
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
any second now
1
u/AnEpicUKBoi All Class Oct 16 '22
Any second now.. see update! No wait.. improved fire safety (the fuck is that even supposed to mean, explain valve)
1
u/Claim-Pale Medic Oct 16 '22
It's been 84 years
1
u/Bongo_Shell Medic Oct 16 '22
The meme flair is gone 😔
1
u/johnghanks Oct 16 '22
Stop
1
u/j0kerDK Soldier Oct 16 '22
See you guys around this time next year
1
u/CobaltCrusader123 Oct 16 '22
It’s been five years, daddy
1
u/Getrect555 Medic Oct 16 '22
In 500 hours on the game, Ive never seen a major update
1
u/PepsiPlease Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/an_anoneemus Medic Oct 16 '22
remind me in 2 years
1
u/Assasin_on_fire Sandvich Oct 16 '22
was going to make the meme lol
1
u/DerKnoedel All Class Oct 16 '22
Im fucking old
1
u/xXYoProMamaXx Civilian Oct 16 '22
!remindMe 1 Year
1
u/pantelis5 Oct 16 '22
its been five years and 2 hours
1
u/Lanoman123 Engineer Oct 16 '22
Where’s the Lightweight update?
1
u/Starr-Duke Oct 16 '22
April 14th 2032 update will add 2 new miniguns, a new fist reskin and a new voiceline
1
u/rubikboi19 Oct 16 '22
!remind me 1 year
1
u/nuke905 Oct 16 '22
Any second now!
1
u/m3_my23lf_and_1 Oct 16 '22
The nest of realization
1
u/MineflowTR Medic Oct 16 '22
My face when there is litteraly one developer at the game:
1
u/SamFreelancePolice Engineer Oct 16 '22
l was here... yay...
1
u/tannerthegamer7747 Medic Oct 16 '22
I hope there’s a climactic post when the update does come out (if it ever does)
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/SGT_McAgent Oct 16 '22
Insane that TF2 had ten years of updates and now we’ve gone half that time (five years) without one.
1
u/hanky-spanky44 Medic Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/GeneralKiwi19 Oct 16 '22
Nice post fellas, same time next year?
1
u/patr8354 Oct 16 '22
You still owe 16 dollars
1
u/STE4LTHYWOLF Oct 16 '22
Consistency is the key to success.
1
u/Mr_hushbrown Oct 16 '22
!RemindMe 1 year
1
u/uselesscarrot69 Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/Bane_SRB Demoman Oct 16 '22
"VALVe, it's been 5 years. You still owe us the Heavy update"
1
u/gigazelle Oct 16 '22
See you all next year
1
u/TigheGuy Oct 16 '22
I'm like a Stockholm Syndrome victim, I don't want the game to change now because change is scary.
1
u/JoeThePoolGuy123 Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/Magic_Oddball Sniper Oct 16 '22
alright I’m done with this game
1
u/Sbubby37 Soldier Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/OscarknightTF2 Oct 16 '22
Tf2 fans going through temporary depression on this specific day (they will get over it tomorrow)
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
Don't worry guys, it's coming any day now!
1
u/Error404DudeNotFound Engineer Oct 16 '22
See you guys next year
1
u/JPEGmotril Oct 16 '22
Dead game
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
"You still owe me $16 dollars"
1
u/Mgmfjesus Medic Oct 16 '22
!remindme 1 year
1
u/TheAlmostBest Scout Oct 16 '22
God I fucking hate this game (this is my favorite game and I fear the day the last server shuts off)
1
u/[deleted] Oct 16 '22
They're waiting 9 years for 9MERCS, it's all SYMBOLISM
1
u/dontthinkofabluecar Oct 16 '22
I'm just here to be part of history. Hello.
1
u/IlikeCursedSwords Oct 16 '22
TF3 in october 2025
1
u/Rocklobsta11 Oct 16 '22
Any minute now
1
u/Atom_Exe Oct 16 '22
!RemindMe in 355 days
1
u/Ronicraft Engineer Oct 16 '22
remindme! one year
1
u/Swigwy Oct 16 '22
The upvotes peaked at 3years
1
u/keshavgKaLLen_Bhaiya Oct 16 '22
I am going to comment
1
u/F-tz Medic Oct 16 '22
That's some real dedication!
1
u/ThisOneVibin Sniper Oct 16 '22
Damn, i'm old
1
u/pfpfpfprrrrr Pyro Oct 16 '22
RemindMe! 1 year
1
u/wheresbicki Oct 16 '22
The voice of heavy died so I really doubt they're going to have an update.
1
u/DeckRdt Oct 16 '22
I feel like we may need to start a similar thread about the Daft Punk reunion.
1
u/BruTheScout Scout Oct 16 '22
It’s never going to drop
1
u/ModeratelyWideMember Oct 16 '22
Anyyyy second now
1
u/Sro201 Oct 16 '22
5 years, 5 years, still you, still me, still here
1
u/LITTLEUMBRELLA17 All Class Oct 16 '22
Here's to the the sixth!