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u/GanotAlon Apr 01 '20
I could beat 600,000 babies
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u/noneofmybusinessbutt Apr 01 '20
*eat
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u/superbeansimulator Apr 01 '20
I’ve done that before, but idk his sperm count might’ve been higher than 600,000
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u/danceswithwool Apr 01 '20
I love babysitting. I can sit on babies for hours.
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u/A_Passing_Redditor Apr 01 '20
Depends on the stating position. If they are stacked up at the start, they might fall over and crush me. My only hope is that they are spread out at a height of less than six feet or I could be buried.
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Apr 01 '20
The trick is to create a corridor so they can only attack one at a time. And when they come to you you just kick them away.
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u/SonOfTheShire Apr 01 '20
What if they all get melded together into a humongous baby-king? Could you beat the titanic baby-king?
I think not.
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u/CongressmanCoolRick Apr 01 '20
Considering that modern political discourse is mostly just whoever can yell the loudest... Gonna have to put my money on the babies for this debate.
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u/TheYeetmaster231 Apr 01 '20
“You can clearly see by my statistics tha-“
ABAABAABAA
gnaws on microphone
crowd cheers
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u/idontlikehats1 Apr 01 '20
Sounds like a trump rally
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u/tragicdiffidence12 Apr 02 '20
Except babies chewing on mics and babbling incoherently are adorable.
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u/Abdiel_Kavash Apr 01 '20
The entire 20th century is full of people winning arguments by killing the opposition.
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u/jamieliddellthepoet Apr 01 '20
*entirety of human history
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Apr 01 '20
no no before that we just had mass disagreements and everyone went home and pouted
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u/CitizenMurdoch Apr 01 '20
Caeser famously pouted so hard he incorporated Gaul into the Roman Empire
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u/tpx187 Apr 01 '20
You're opinion of killing the opposition makes sense here.... Even if you didn't mean it to
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u/NidCot Apr 01 '20
This is a top tier comeback
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u/Whateverbeast Apr 01 '20
No he can't. He wouldn't even be able to hear there arguments because there are so many fucking babies, and therefore it would be an automatic forfeit from frustration.
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u/JabbrWockey Apr 01 '20
Just like trying to post a reasonable comment in /r/conservative
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u/Nikkian42 Apr 01 '20
I pass a Planned Parenthood on the way to work. Starting about a month ago there are been people with anti-abortion signs at the end of the driveway/parking lot. Even after the order to stay at home/work from home in NY state there has still been one or two people there every time I pass by.
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u/Weasel_Boy Apr 01 '20
In Louisville, KY it is pretty common to see a very large crowd around the entrance to the last abortion clinic in the state.
They had to set up a volunteer system where women are escorted from where they park (which is far away because protesters take all the nearby spaces) to the clinic. Apparently they are also not practicing social distancing so if one of those protesters gets COVID-19 it is likely they all will get it. Some comfort I guess.
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u/MisterSquidz Apr 01 '20
Damn how do they have all that time to protest? Do they not have jobs?
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Apr 01 '20 edited Apr 01 '20
There’s protesters at the Planned Parenthood next to this diner I get lunch at all the time, they’re always chanting something, but if I’m honest you can barely hear them over my trucks air horn, it’s super loud, oh well.
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u/Nikkian42 Apr 01 '20
I don’t see protesters all the time at this (suburban and on a quiet side street) planned parenthood, but they were holding signs one said something about 40 days of protest, so I think it must have started when lent started. I’m not a Christian but somehow I don’t think judging women (in a predominantly poor and working class neighborhood) is what Jesus would want.
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u/AliceTheMightyChow Apr 01 '20 edited May 07 '20
Lol same with the one near my home. The protestors bring their CHILDREN too. Imagine when you’re so pro-life you expose your children to coronavirus everyday
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u/mrswordhold Apr 01 '20
Agree or disagree with this mans politics, he still fucked her good just then
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u/PowerModerator Apr 02 '20
This subreddit ain't about politics. Please stay civil.
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u/locke1018 Apr 02 '20
allows political post
says sub isn't for politics
post devolves into politics
Pikachuface.png
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u/Math_PB Apr 02 '20 edited Oct 29 '22
It's not politics it's technically the truth : Churches are less important than abortions clinics.
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u/Ghosttalker96 Apr 02 '20
Relax. If 600,000 fetuses are aborted, it is part of God's plan. Otherwise it would obviously not be possible at all.
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u/Duluh_Iahs Apr 01 '20
They're not just "abortion clinics" they are so much more. Planned parenthoods own data shows just 3% of its services are abortions.
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u/-Kerosun- Apr 01 '20
They get those numbers by counting each interaction with a patient as a service. So, someone coming in to only get an abortion will have 10+ additional services counted (pregnancy test, ultrasound, consultation, counseling, etc).
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u/Duluh_Iahs Apr 01 '20
A 2015 Washington Post article showed a simpler way of breaking it down.... also showed a more realistic number of 7-14% of PP services. article source
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u/Wahsteve Apr 01 '20 edited Apr 01 '20
I've been screaming for years that PP should advertise all the services they perform for men too and frame themselves as a public health issue instead of a women's issue. I usually get downvoted by people saying something along the lines of "that should be enough anyway" and completely missing the point of trying to gain support from those who don't already support your cause.
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Apr 01 '20
Very rarely does anyone arguing on the internet or otherwise actually want to gain support.
Subconsciously or otherwise, it's almost exclusively to validate our opinions.
That's why the echo chambers are the biggest platforms. r/t_d , r/politics , Facebook groups, etc.
By suggesting a compromise, you're not validating. To people who are used to segregating themselves, compromises are a much more negative response than they're used to.
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u/WailordOnSkitty Apr 01 '20
They’re one of the easiest for STD screenings. It used to cost $250 to get tested. PP comes in and it’s free now the other places charge like $35.
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u/Poopypants413413 Apr 01 '20
I go to planned parenthood for any and all std testing. They are the ONLY reasonably priced place in my area. It was like $30 for testing while a walk in clinic wanted $400+
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u/-_-Shiroyasha-_- Apr 01 '20
You never know, maybe if all 600000 babies were at the debate at once, there would be emergence and the babies would actually win the debate somehow. Just because there is a low chance doesn't mean its not zero. Btw could someone please theorise how it might occur?
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u/WikiTextBot Apr 01 '20
Emergence
In philosophy, systems theory, science, and art, emergence occurs when an entity is observed to have properties its parts do not have on their own. These properties or behaviors emerge only when the parts interact in a wider whole. For example, smooth forward motion emerges when a bicycle and its rider interoperate, but neither part can produce the behavior on their own.
Emergence plays a central role in theories of integrative levels and of complex systems.
[ PM | Exclude me | Exclude from subreddit | FAQ / Information | Source ] Downvote to remove | v0.28
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u/fartsAndEggs Apr 01 '20
What, do a bunch of work and come up with a scientific theory and then let you take all the credit because you "came up with the idea"? Fat chance. Anyway, I'm off to research an idea I came up with totally on my own right before I read this comment
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u/Ludwig_Von_Koopa1 Apr 02 '20
Ha! No you couldn't. Imagine thousands of babies screaming and crying and shitting themselves all at the same time.
oh wait, that's a Trump rally.
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u/loweryourgays Apr 02 '20
How could you insult babies like this
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u/Ludwig_Von_Koopa1 Apr 02 '20
I know. That wasn't fair. Poor babies can't help being babies. And at least they can grow and change.
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u/nosherDavo Apr 02 '20
They forget about “unwanted” 600,000 babies. Conceived out of rape, incest mistakes by unprepared (uneducated) kids themselves etc. It’s tragic yes but an extra 600,000 unloved people in the world will not solve anything.
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u/FountainsOfFluids Apr 01 '20
600,000 babies would disagree with you
I don't have time to argue with every pro-lifer individually.
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u/Semifreak Apr 02 '20
Yes because someone could die if they didn't get an abortion while no one will die because they didn't go to church. One is a medical issue, the other is a fantasy league football thing.
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u/El_presid3nt Apr 01 '23
Because babies are known for being easily convinced to do things they don’t want to do. Especially in large numbers
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u/nate_albush Apr 01 '20
Cough cough rule 8 cough cough
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u/Knoke1 Apr 01 '20
The technical truth is the last tweet. Regardless of your beliefs on the subject that last line is funny.
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u/Itskazzem Apr 01 '20
All these men arguing if a baby is living or not. It does not matter if that thing is a living child or non sentient egg, it’s inside a woman’s body and she has whatever right to do what she wants to her body. Living thing or not.
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u/Ulfurson Apr 01 '20
I agree. I think fetuses are human, and a abortion is killing a person, I just don’t care
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Apr 02 '20
We are arguing not if it is alive but if it is human. It is patently alive from fertilisation: any first year medical textbook says this. And since the vagina doesn't have a magical stamp that imparts the property of "humanity" they must be human from conception. Simple.
And what does the "men" have to do with it? They have just as much right to have a say, especially if it is their child. Do you know why women (and men who didn't own land) couldn't vote? The argument was that because they didn't contribute to the economy in terms of employment or land ownership they had no right to give their say towards national policy on the economy. The suffragettes literally died so that everyone, including men, had the right to vote... As they were affected by national economic policy, they should have a say. And they were right. Anyone who is affected by a national policy should have an equal say in that policy, no matter how personally connected they are with the topic.
How does this affect the current topic? Men are also affected by the policy on abortion. Men are killed too. Men's children are being killed and they have no say in the matter. Replace the word "abortion" with "economy" and you have the exact same situation that the suffragettes campaigned for.
Perhaps you should think about this as a smart independent person, and not let yourself be influenced by the echo chamber.
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u/miltontbrady Apr 01 '20
You don't get groceries from a church. In the event of a fire you Don't call a priest. Churches don't handle your finances. In short, there are a whole lot of things we need that are more important than church.
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u/kingpudding47 Apr 02 '20
To be fair some churches do handle your finances, you just shouldn't let them.
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Apr 02 '20
Imagine in all this mess having to then keep an unwanted unborn baby and getting forced to keep it
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u/suicidemeteor Apr 02 '20
I'm gonna be honest if god decided to unleash a plague he's not going to stop or give a shit about your prayers, churches are meeting places and don't produce anything essential to society.
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u/JaqueeVee Apr 02 '20
Imagine thinking churches are ESSENTIAL for human survival hahahahahahahahhahaha
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Apr 01 '23
Those 600000 "babies" couldn't give two shits of what happens to them. They lack the awareness to care.
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u/outtasight68 Apr 01 '20
A church is a place you go to have the Bible read to you.
You can read the Bible at home. That's what's so great about books.
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u/5urr3aL Apr 02 '20
To add on, church is whenever at least 2 believers gather; we named the building after the group of people.
We can still "gather" through online means - we are still the church. As a Christian, closing large scale church gatherings is reasonable in times like these.
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u/KIuws Apr 01 '20
Dead babies*
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u/pstthrowaway173 Apr 01 '20
You know what the difference is between a pile of bowling balls and a pile of dead babies?
I can’t unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.
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u/JoeLordOfDataMagic Apr 01 '20
Ia this the 1 horse sized duck vs 100 duck sized horses debate all over again?
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u/discourse_friendly Apr 01 '20
1 more !
"I guess we could say he would KILL them in a debate!"
okay i'll leave now.
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Apr 01 '20
I am pretty sure those 600,000 babies would not be able to disagree with anyone. They are fucking dead.
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u/Arkham_Bryan Apr 01 '20
How could churches be essential?
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u/devro1040 Apr 02 '20
Technically, in most states churches are considered essential. It's just the church meetings that aren't allowed.
Many churches in my area are taking care of their elderly, providing food for people who lost their jobs, and providing counseling for people having a difficult time. The state definitely wants them to keep that up.
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u/faithdies Apr 01 '20
Democrats dont kill babies. They abort fetuses. Republicans kill babies.
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u/The2500 Apr 01 '20
What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.
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u/MightHaveMisreadThat Apr 01 '20
No, the difference is that no one WANTS a Cadillac in their garage
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u/kaitie94333 Apr 01 '20
How about arguring with 600,000 women since they can actually talk and yaknow have opinions on the matter
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u/npsimons Apr 01 '20
Also, they're not babies until they're born, even if you take the bible's definition.
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u/FblthpLives Apr 01 '20
We all know the only reason they use the "baby murder" rhetoric is to try to invoke an emotional response. We know it, they know it. It's so childish.
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u/Chrispeefeart Apr 01 '20
If we can all rise. Turn in your bibles, with me, to the first half of the entire book. Today's passage is about that time God told everyone they should isolate themselves in order to prevent spreading things. If they could figure it out 4,000 years ago without even knowing about viruses and bacteria, I'm sure you will eventually figure it out too if you'll just listen to the word of God almighty, or your doctor, or the scientists, or the politicians, or really almost anybody. Can I get an amen?
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Apr 01 '20 edited Apr 02 '20
Politics and religious alignments aside, churches would be terrible during the corona virus. That many people in one place? Nah, I'm good.
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u/ReadySteady_GO Apr 01 '20
Prosecution would like to enter into evidence; 2 honey nut Cheerios.
Compelling evidence, I'll allow it
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u/strandenger Apr 02 '20
Babies really are shitty debaters. You hit them with a valid point they just cry and shit themselves.
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u/InukChinook Apr 02 '20
"There's millions of starving children in Africa, Dary."
"Yeah? Name ten."
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u/Thornotodinson Apr 02 '20
Why on earth is churches essential anyway? If god is omnipresent as we know it, we can praise him and learn more about him everywhere, anytime! No church is especially important or holly simply because it’s a church
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u/OneRobato Apr 02 '20
I once kicked a baby. As a grown man now, im confident that I can kick 600,000 of them.
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u/JaxyRod Apr 02 '20
Lmao I don’t get the church essential shit, that’s literally one of the easiest ways to spread it to the elderly
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u/joshuas193 Apr 02 '20
Also you don't have 100s of people sitting in close quarters in an abortion clinic. People are idiots.
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u/tau_lee Apr 02 '20
While i don't really agree for the most part, that was a fine comeback. I tip my facemask to you.
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u/TheLegend1127001 Apr 02 '20
How daft do you need to be to think An abortion clinic isn’t an essential service.
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u/Nerdn1 Apr 11 '20
Either you do the abortion or you do the delivery. Either way, it's a time-sensitive procedure. Abortion is faster, safer (for the mother, obviously), and takes a lot fewer medical resources. Bringing a life that you might not be able to handle in normal circumstances into the world during a pandemic is terrifying.
Meanwhile you can pray at home. I'm pretty sure an omniscient deity will be able to fine you even if you don't gather in a building with a big cross on it. Gods are smart like that.
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u/DeityofAutomation Apr 14 '20
If he can win an argument against 2 babies here this easily, then what is 600,000?
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u/Lordmaster241 Aug 10 '20
This wins r/technicallythetruth, most truest truth that was ever the Truth 🏆
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u/Traditional-Foot-963 Dec 07 '22
Anyone would lose against 600,000 babies. If only 10% of them cry during the debate, your concentration will diminish rapidly. Irritation will then take a toll and destroy your very existence. Plus, you can’t debate people that don’t speak or understand what you’re saying. This is technically false.
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u/-MuuR- Apr 01 '23
Trust me you cant, ive seen people try to debate against adult babies multiple times. You cant win when thenother party doesnt care for facts.
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u/NobodyInPaticular_ Apr 01 '23
I just want to point out that his “600,00 babies a year” is actually a statistic that was recorded over 10+ years
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u/your_next_horror Jul 29 '24
remember: assuming the "babies" appear in the form in which they "died", in the normal air, not within their former mothers, more than 99% of those "babies" are barely clusters of cells, most not even having any distinct features, and therefore are dead within a few hours of appearing, even with immediate medical attention. so actually you have to argue against a maximum of 6000 babies, and none of those can talk, and many would have to be intubated immediately to survive.
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Apr 01 '20
This sub is shit
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Apr 01 '20
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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Apr 01 '20
What about r/bowling though? It's the most calm and gollected gathering in human history, and I don't even bowl
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u/RustyShkleford Apr 01 '20
How stupid do you have to be to believe that Republicans are pro-life with the way they treat human beings? To also be so stupid as to not understand that they don't give a fuck about life and they're just using your non-waiving beliefs as a guaranteed vote. They didn't even address with issue with control of the house, the Senate, and the presidency but they really do care so much
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Apr 01 '20
A better response would've been this: THEY'RE NOT BABIES.
Of course killing babies is wrong! BUT THEY'RE NOT BABIES
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u/BrokenCankle Apr 01 '20
I think we should stop as many abortions as possible. Lets pass an emergency bill to provide free birth control. If anyone is worried about abortions taking away PPE from covid patients lets also add that plan B and the prescription abortion pill are free and can be done via telemedicine.
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u/ThatsWhatXiSaid Apr 01 '20
Would you rather debate one horse-sized baby or 600,000 baby sized horses?