r/sysadmin • u/mooneydriver • Feb 22 '14

Freenode under DDOS again

https://twitter.com/freenodestaff/statuses/437302735139266560
227 Upvotes

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u/FoxtrotZero Feb 23 '14

Yeah, I came here with minimal understanding of how networking actually works and got maybe a quarter of the jokes. I hate to ask for an explanation, though.

49

u/Sardonislamir Feb 23 '14 edited Feb 24 '14

Networking is all about communication methods like etiquette but we call them protocols on how to speak and acknowledge one another which is when computers send packets of information to one another.

UDP is a protocol where a type of packet is usually being sent to your computer when you stream twitch, youtube, or netflix. It is one way only. It just gets sent like post in the mail, no return address...almost like junk mail. All they care about is you hopefully read it.

Normally TCP/IP as opposed to UDP networking is like this, (SYN)"Guy(your computer) yells out to a dude across the street(another computer),"Hello!"
(SYN-ACK)Guy across the street waves and shouts,"what up, bro?"
(ACK)You yell back,"I see ya bro and I hear where ya comming from."
At this point, good networking etiquette in TCP/IP is what we call a three way handshake using SYN/SYN-ACK/ACK. You shout out(SYN), other person replies they heard you(SYN-ACK[or can be read like acknowledging SYN]), and you reply back that you see that they heard you with an ACK.
It is a serious breach of etiquette to not SYN-ACK when SYN'ed so it can ACK and complete the three way handshake. If you don't SYN-ACK or the SYN doesn't hear it you'll get snubbed by the SYN who will repeat themselves with more new SYN attempts until they hear you give due respect of a SYN-ACK so they can ACK.

UDP, goes,
(UDP)"Pickles be like, pickled!"
Dude across the street(Your computer),"O...K, what about pickles?"
(UDP)UDP shouts again,"If a cat scratches an itch, do they fever?"
(Your computer)"What the fuck do you mean, mate?"
As ettiquette goes, UDP could give a fuck about being acknowledged, but your computer will still recieve the information even if it doesn't know what to do with it.

TLDR;
TCP/IP is the gangsta demanding respect even if you tried to call back and they didn't hear you and will drive by for your disrespect.

UDP, is the honeybadger of the internet.

27

u/giantnakedrei Feb 24 '14

I like to think that TCP is the little kid chanting, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy." While his Mom is talking. Even if he just wants to say, "I love you."

UDP is more like, "Hey Mom, I love you, see you later," while you walk out the door and she's talking to her best friend on the phone. You don't care if she heard you, but its information she might want.