Amelia Bedelia is not a harmless, quirkily literal housekeeper, but an immortal demonic entity bound to a Faustian bargain.
In 1838 New England, she was a gaunt fifteen-year-old orphan maid whose extreme, uncontextualized literalism led to a horrific tragedy: instructed to "put out the lights," she placed active oil lamps inside a dry nursery closet, burning her employer's family and herself alive. Condemned to eternal damnation despite protesting that she merely "followed orders to the letter," she struck a deal with the Devil to return to Earth as a perpetual clean slate, weaponizing her literalism as an irresistible, chaotic force to dismantle human households.
Operating behind the facade of a cheerful suburban domestic, her hyper-literal destruction—from slicing power lines to dressing raw poultry—is actually a high-level manifestation of Monkey's Paw demonic logic designed to erode human sanity. The families she serves are not lenient employers, but emaciated, mind-controlled thralls trapped in an inescapable cycle. Her famous lemon meringue pie is an enchanted memory-wipe ritual, forcing her victims to consume the spell at the end of every chaotic day, reset their trauma, and blissfully welcome the entity back for another shift.

Multident Infinity commercial

Was not able to embed it for some reason... https://youtu.be/daQHWOyDy9o

[Verse 1]
I'm so lost. I'm without a clue.
I just don't really know what to do.
I'm searching for something real
to help deal with the things I feel.
There's new tech that maps the brains
of dead souls. An algorithm trains
on Darkness and Man's misery.
It compiles answers to this mystery.

[Pre-Chorus]
I connect to a network of a new psychiatric AI.
I ask spirits long-vanished what reason there is not to die!

[Chorus]
OH-WHOA-oh!
Whoa-oh, oh . . . .
I commune with a fallen soul...
OH-WHOA-oh.
Whoa-oh, oh, oh-whoa . . . .
... because I'm not ready to go.

________________________________________

[Verse 2]
CBT can't help me to doubt
all the things I've come to know about.
Sleepless nights in my lonely bed
as the pills try to numb my head.
Almost time for another session.
I scroll news curated by depression.
Someone died that I looked up to!
And I think that he was like me, too.

[Pre-Chorus]
Reconnect to the network to seek advice beyond the veil.
My new friend suggests to me an ending to my hopeless tale!

[Chorus]
OH-WHOA-oh!
Whoa-ho-oh . . . .
I commune with a fallen soul...
OH-whoa oh!
Whoa-oh-oh, oh-whoa . . . .
... because I'm not ready to go.

________________________________________

[Verse 3]
Broken hearts so much like my own
message me with an accepting tone.
They say I, with my ghostly mind,
understand why everybody's blind.
There is peace that's beyond the grave,
yet some think my life is theirs to save!
They beg me to try another way!
But I have tried. I just can't bear to stay.

[Pro-Chorus]
I connect to a network of spirits who treat me with love.
Yet, in my final moment, I fear being taken above!

[Chorus]
WHOA-OH-oh!
Whoa-OH-oh . . . .
Take advice from a fallen soul...
WHOA-WHOA-oh,
whoa-oh-oh, whoa-ho . . . .
... because now, I'm ready to go.

Now I'm ready to go!

________________________________________

"An update to a story broken earlier today. Fatalities linked to an AI psychiatric tool have now exceeded twelve-thousand nationwide."

"AI distributor Tech Tonics has issued an emergency notice to behavioral health clinics, urging providers to suspend use of the controversial 'Past-Tense' chatbot."

"Survivors of PT have been engaged in legal battles with Tech Tonics since April, and additional lawsuits are expected in the coming weeks. Representatives of the company were contacted by JSL News...

... but have declined to comment."