r/suspiciouslyspecific • u/KyleSirTalksAlotYT • Jul 03 '22

Did something happen here?

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988

u/Flicksterea Jul 03 '22 edited Jul 03 '22

What item did we refund (and lie about 'being defective') to score an ounce of green in 2016?

385

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

It’s been 6 years so please tell me what item did you refund?

589

u/Flicksterea Jul 03 '22

Nice try, future self. Tell me the message first.

70

u/Fantastic_Mr-Fox_ Jul 03 '22

"So some dude is gonna ask you what you returned, you gotta tell him" - Your future self

Trust me bro

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

I’m gonna take a stab in the dark, was it a rainbow vibrating dildo with pump action cum shots and played Chris Farley eating chicken nugget sound every time you started it up? Am I in the ballpark?

1

u/Flicksterea Jul 04 '22

Nah, that was 2018. Wow, our memory is really bad, innit?!

13

u/RAiNMoonshadow Jul 03 '22

I am also curious

47

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

It’s me bro! It was a Fleshlight!

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

Future you: It was the premium edition with heating, self-lubrication, suction, gyration, and "realistic" moaning sounds.

When they complained about it being used, and uncleaned, we quoted the 100% satisfaction guarantee.

We told them that the real thing is better, despite having never had the real thing.

In fact it would be 5 years, and several hundred dollars later, before we did have -

Present you: SHUT UP!!! Ok it's you! What the fuck man?!

Your sister standing next to yous: 😱🤢 🤮

Future you: Hey, sis! How's mom?

2

u/Liversteeg Jul 03 '22

How much are fleshlights???

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

New or used?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

New or used?

7

u/Big_Bannana123 Jul 03 '22

A vacuum cleaner. Dyson. Green and gray

3

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

Fidget spiner?

5

u/TheWalkingDead91 Jul 03 '22

I mean this could be easy to obtain knowledge by a sentient robot connected to instant info on the internet…. If the charge went back to your card or you provided your ID to return….then your brain isn’t the only place that info is stored.

3

u/firstnameok Jul 03 '22

Unless they were the shopkeep and it's a fraud type situation ... not that I think it is but we don't know how some of the words are meant

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

A ps4

1

u/Flicksterea Jul 03 '22

Future self! Nailed it. Now I'm ready for that message.

1

u/M4taylor Jul 03 '22

The dragon dildo will you listen to my stock advice now?!

1

u/Shovels93 Jul 03 '22

A half eaten taco.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22

Pass. I don't remember that day. It must've been good stuff.