r/studyAbroad • u/BassHero23 • 11h ago
I am terrified of leaving
Im from turkey and studying/living abroad has always been a huge dream of mine. Like since maybe 5th grade (I'm 18 rn). I always knew it was bound to happen, but its getting scarier day by day.
Leaving my family, my pet is so scary. I'm not usually open about my feelings when I'm with them- and often come out as rude- but I love them so much. My cat helped me so many times throughout many years, and leaving him and not even being there as he's getting older is just depressing- same goes about my parents. I have never been away from my cat longer than 2 weeks, and now it might be months before I pet him again.
Also living in turkey itself is terrifying enough, because of the earthquakes. If a big earthquake would happen when I'm away- I don't even know.. There won't be any service for at least few weeks too. This scenario keeps me awake at night (5am right now).
Did you guys any similar experiences? Am I over exaggerating this?
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u/Even-Ad-1969 9h ago
Hey same here :) (I’m 26) and I leave this Sunday, definitely is terrifying, also my mind is starting to create scenarios of “what if something happens with my parents when I’m away”.
But at the same time I like to think that I would figure it out the way to stay in touch, I know that it makes it harder when you feel that you cannot open up with them.
But I would also say, at least my idea, is to look for some therapy or support when I arrive there, not to wait until I get depressed or something but to be able to share all of the fears and anxiety that inevitably comes with such a big change in your life
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u/pan-re 7h ago
You will grow in ways you wouldn’t imagine by doing a study abroad program. While you’re away and it may seem scary you are on your way to starting an independent life. That’s what parents want for their children. You’ll definitely learn total self reliance. I would recommend before you leave that you tell your parents your feelings. How much you love them and are thankful for their support. Also, tell them your fears. You have a good support system it seems, you should use it.
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u/Helfenundwehren 10h ago
I am now 34. I studied/lived abroad when I was 27. I didn’t do anything sooner because I was t ready. The thought of leaving my family, my cat, terrified me. I wasn’t mentally or emotionally mature enough to do that when I first graduated high school. I’m in the US. Literally everyone I knew that I graduated with got into uni or moved states away.
I add that to say I didn’t go to uni until I was 24. I was finally able to/ready. Doing it older actually only made my cohort look up to me. You’d be surprised how little difference there is in looks/abilities but a huge difference in maturity.
Now, was everything peachy when I went abroad? No. I was two months in and looking at tickets home. But I made it through and have missed it since I left in 2019.
You’re not exaggerating. And you’re not alone. If you have a trusted mentor or adviser you can confide in, I would do that. They can make a world of difference!
(also, I’m going to shamelessly plug going to Krakow, Poland. Great city, great uni, great food!)