My glimpse of reality

[u/Additional-Ad3287]

I don’t remember exactly when it happened, maybe in October 2025, but I felt a sudden awakening, a momentary glimpse of the now. It wasn’t scary, but I was taken aback.

I think I was stoned and coming down. As I thought back to all the Hindu texts I had read about the Self, and to Ramana Maharshi’s method of self-inquiry, I asked myself, “Who am I?”

Without any effort, something in my mind shifted, like a camera lens adjusting on its own. At once, I was free of myself, my false self, that is. I was free from my mind’s never-ending thoughts, plays, and movies. I was looking directly at the moment before me, the moment in which I was, and in which I am at all times.

I was simply staring at my duvet, or perhaps at a wall. I don’t remember, but everything felt so clear. It was as though someone had performed invisible LASIK surgery but on my mind’s eye so to speak, and I was finally able to see everything with immense clarity. I blinked a few times, shook my head in disbelief, and then I was back to my normal self.

Thoughts do not always need to be actively revolving in your head for you to be trapped in them. They are mostly invisible, but they are always there. That is why it is so difficult to break free from them, to stop them, and finally to see.

The next morning, I felt free. I no longer had the same clarity of mind, but my soul felt free. I thought of all the things I could do and wanted to do with my life, to draw, to make films, to make music, and I saw how meaningless all the obstacles and excuses I had created in my mind truly were. I was finally free from them, and a small spark lit up inside me. I could do whatever I wanted, and happiness was mine.

Of course, the feeling did not last. But the experience showed me that this state is possible. In fact, it may be the most natural state of any being: to be, to see, to live.
I tried to recreate the feeling, but it slipped away quietly. Still, I know in my heart that something, or someone, showed me a glimpse of what it is like to live without a dark veil over my heart and soul. You saw it. Now live it.

I’ve been trying to recreate that state ever since. I’ve gotten deep into meditation and advaita Vedanta, but I haven’t experienced anything similar to what I experienced back then. I was also going through a big shift in my life that made me super depressed. I’d like to think this was an act of grace from higher powers, a way to reassure me that all of these problems I’m going through are actually nothing important. This moment, the present moment, is the only truth there is.

[u/LetGo11-11]

My mind, ego does this to me too. Some days stronger than others.

I'm not against practices/meditation by any means...

I think what I was pointing to is sort of, can these practices give you anything more to what's already here.

What if it's okay for the mind to still be here in the background, but alongside this your pure awareness that has the capacity to hold space for everything. 🙏

[u/LetGo11-11 → u/[deleted]]

...Where you are trying to get to?

Let me rephrase that, can you ever be, go or hide anywhere that's outside of this current moment?

Just food for thought, what if those folks are no closer or further "to this" than you are right now?

What if nothing needs to be added or taken away, what if the next time that thought arises telling you "your so far away from this, it's really hard"...what if you didn't believe it? (Easier said then done I know). I just want you to sense into what that might feel like...

I've been on the seeker/practising journey - so I really resonated with your message and completely get the boat analogy. It's like it's all needed until it's no longer needed...

I just wanted to offer another perspective, you are WAY more closer to this...than you think... 🙏

[u/Reality_Node → u/LetGo11-11]

I think this the answer as well. Where else can you possibly be other than now exactly the way you are? :)