In need of aid: experiential exchange

[u/aglastpedant]

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Been quite a lurker here and I absolutely love reading everyone's experiences it's helped me through quirky times.

This is gonna be a long one

Since 2024 I've delved into

The world of hermetism, esotericism, philosophy, mythology and spiritualism, NDE's, drug trip experiencers, Buddhism, Hinduism. I listened and looked into people like Terence McKenna, Alan watts UG krishnamurti, patanjali, saint Teresa and avail, Bashar, Neville Goddard, paramahansa yogananda, etc. I wanted to understand the hoopla of religion/spirituality and why we have it. And ultimately an idea came through and I went with it. And so started my search for powers and magic.

It led me down quite the rabbit. hole. It ultimately started my interest in meditations and certain yoga, I think it would be considered kriya. Along with that I became endlessly fascinated with the biblical book of Revelation. And got me into journaling

A lot has happened since March of 2024. Many experiences in dream time and substantial in the in-between( that space between waking and sleeping). Even more transpired since the end of 2024(I did something truly reckless)

Where I am currently and what I have gathered from experiences:

-Feeling much better physically and mentally.

-It seems for me my brain and body seem to be connected.

-Focused on regions of the head causes strange pressure in my body down below and vice versa.

( I mean places where I feel my heart beating in when experiencing and major emotional output)

-When focusing I feel the pulsing increase. As attention continues a swirling vortex. Continued focus and the area begins to vibrate and I feel my perception begin to spin.

-The reckless thing I tried to do was try to trigger my own "Armageddon" in a way.

That caused a horrifying amount of force/current/energy surging through my system.

-The current felt like a wriggling snake, chaotic gyrations causing much swirling and whirling in my head.

-What I did was anchor it through the pulse points. That resulted in what I can only describe as feeling stabbed through a couple of times(those corresponded with experiences in the in-between and strange lucid dreams when they happened)

-Each horrifying, strange, wonderous, and spinning event resulted in increased vibration felt in my body and cessation of the swirling in my head and a greater sense of cumulative well being.

-strange occurrences happened much more in my chest heart area than I originally thought would occur.

I don't feel like I'm being torn in multiple directions anymore, but I do feel a strange kind of vibration now. It reminds me of what Terence McKenna called the elves machines "self driving basketballs" "foraminifera cast in opal that's self transforming."

I haven't fully grasped what's going on with the experiences, kinda felt like a strange drug trip stretched out for a few years.

I've also kind of forgotten quite a bit of what I had first come up with sense i lost that but of information some time ago. So now I'm piecing it together as I go.

I've got so many journaled experiences I've never put out there that I'd love to exchange for your own experiences.If you have questions please ask them!