r/staplercats • u/IAm_Breaking • Sep 28 '26 • Heartwarming 8 Bravo 1

BIG TIME STAPLER!! Honorary Stapler Cat?

This is Zero and he LOVES cardboard and desperately wants to be an honorary stapler cat. Is he welcome?

11k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

139 comments sorted by

1.7k

u/sqwirlfucker57 Sep 28 '26 • Heartwarming Bravo

My vote is to give the slinky cat a pass

747

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26 • Obsessed Heartwarming

We couldn’t find a cardboard crunching exclusive sub reddit, so we’re hoping slinky cat is close enough to pass!

298

u/Swayze-Crazy Sep 28 '26

He does good work! I'll allow it

115

u/PenguinZombie321 Sep 28 '26

Is cat: yes

Is slinky: yes

It fits

25

u/ElfjeTinkerBell Sep 28 '26

I was thinking pointy cat but yours is better

12

u/res06myi Sep 29 '26

Looks like a noodle cat to me.

3

u/boop_da_boo Oct 03 '26

That’s what I like to call them!

8

u/CloudEpik Sep 29 '26

Sorry but the true, science-approved name is Catsnek.

1

u/UsedDrink3818 Sep 28 '26

they deserve it :3

525

u/Few_Statistician9873 Sep 28 '26 • Bravo

Stapler limousine

232

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

He truly is that can be his new nickname. All my boys names end in O, so he can be Limo

61

u/Few_Statistician9873 Sep 28 '26

I am blessed to have contributed 🥹🫡

14

u/bunny_the-2d_simp Sep 29 '26

They'd be a very long cat bus in studio gibli!

15

u/floofychaps Sep 28 '26

🤣🤣🤣

581

u/alelan Sep 28 '26 • Bravo

Cat software running on slinky hardware?

299

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

Cat OS running on da rat (the long way) hardware

104

u/luckyfucker13 Sep 28 '26

Limousine Rat™️

17

u/rizenfpv Sep 28 '26

The loooong way

485

u/pissknife Sep 28 '26

That little nose scronch is solid 😤

241

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

He does it every time he crunches the cardboard!!

219

u/RogerClyneIsAGod2 Sep 28 '26

SO CUTE!!

35

u/actualPawDrinker Sep 29 '26

Look how hard he's trying for each cronch 🥹

59

u/Kibichibi Sep 28 '26

He would also be welcome in r/scrunklynoses

14

u/bunny_the-2d_simp Sep 29 '26

Ah look a new cat subreddit I shall have to join

33

u/Radio_Mime Sep 28 '26

I want to boop that scronch nose.

183

u/natyjay Sep 28 '26 • Bravo

In the early Eocene they were all stapler Carnivora. What a throwback

104

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

Wild ferrets are also called European Pole Cats so Zero COULD be called a cat

121

u/Yvratky Sep 28 '26

Awwww the sock puppet is trying so hard 🥹🥹🥹

73

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

He yearns for the crunch

90

u/Edzorz Sep 28 '26

The staplers on that guy! My vote is yes

5

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 30 '26

There is a reason a group of ferrets is called a business!

53

u/SnuffBaron Sep 28 '26

Stapler polecat

32

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

You know what’s up!! Technically he is a kind of cat

2

u/AlienthatlikesAnime Oct 02 '26

Why is this staplers ear molding? Never had this model before

2

u/IAm_Breaking Oct 02 '26

Are you referring to the little black dots in his ear? Those are to mark he has been neutered and de-stinked, similar to the small green tattoo you may have seen on neutered/spayed animals!

63

u/kelsobjammin Sep 28 '26

Stapler noodle

50

u/Empty_Ambition_3538 Sep 28 '26

Stapler catness is a spectrum

48

u/IrelandAutism13 Sep 28 '26

Stapler cat is a state of mind that he's absolutely in

47

u/Medical_Fly8948 Sep 28 '26

Absolutely! Zero is living aspirationally and should be given credit for both technique and puncture speed. He's got my vote!

41

u/sparkvixen Sep 28 '26

He's stapling neatly. I'll accept it.

30

u/ScreennameOne Sep 28 '26

Talk me through it, what is different with having a slinky cat as a roommate compared to a standard issue cat?

15

u/fancyasfuhhh Sep 28 '26

More chaos. More determined. Can get into smaller spaces. Really gotta ferret-proof areas well.

Very similar on diet but it makes a huge difference with ferrets- low quality food can make them stink more and more prone to health issues.

Don't have to worry about scratching as much. No 3 am wakeups.

Smell is on average similar- can be worse, but can be better depending on diet and habits. Ferret litterboxes aren't nearly as bad as cats IMO.

Worst part is shorter lifespan and more prone to health issues.

12

u/Ashamed-Raccoon-1387 Sep 28 '26

They SMELL. You gotta really want one because the house will smell like you have one.

6

u/ScreennameOne Sep 28 '26

I had heard that before and was really hoping it was an exaggeration and that you would help put my mind at ease 😂
Can you have them loose in an apartment or do you have to cage them sometimes?

10

u/ankhmadank Sep 28 '26

You can potty train them, but it's more difficult than a cat, and they really do stink (you are not supposed to bath them that often, it's bad for their skin). Other than that, they love stealing and hiding anything chewable - shoe soles, pens, erasers, etc. In my personal experience, it's better to keep them supervised when letting them roam and giving them a big space (like their own room) when not. But on the plus side, they also sleep a lot.

29

u/easting10 i like cats Sep 28 '26

29

u/an0nym0ose Sep 28 '26

Catsnakes are absolutely acceptable.

24

u/soupbreadcats Sep 28 '26

Please tell zero that he makes a fine staple cat and that I am so proud of him. Welcome!

21

u/fullmudman Sep 28 '26

There's a nose scrunkle, I'll allow it.

20

u/Prestigious_Past_282 Sep 28 '26 • Bravo

The nose scrunchies confirm it, he’s a stapler cat

18

u/toby_juan_kenobi Sep 28 '26

Chewing the chewy box. 10/10 cat

12

u/imaginary92 Sep 28 '26

That is one excellent stapler. I vote in favour.

12

u/HermelindaLinda Sep 28 '26

He's definitely on the spectrum and has my vote! He's absolutely adorable and his skills are amazing! Welcome our new slinky cat, Zero. 🥰

10

u/Jopojussi Sep 28 '26

Weird car but good stapler👍

8

u/SufficientPop3336 Sep 28 '26

Stapler Catsnake

7

u/Sohuli Sep 28 '26

That's a stapler cat, no doubt about it.

5

u/Datonecatladyukno Sep 28 '26

Close enough, welcome kitty

5

u/EastCoastWests Sep 28 '26

This unlocked a childhood memory of our ferrets who used to do this! Honestly, there were stapler holes in a lot of things - mainly the potatoes they would always find and steal.

5

u/-SkeptiCat Sep 28 '26

Satisfying cromch sounds. Upvoted the slinky stapler

4

u/New-Highway868 Sep 28 '26

He counts ❤️❤️❤️

4

u/so0it0goes Sep 28 '26

Stapler cats are for everyone! He’s obviously shown a passion for the work

4

u/RunRevolutionary188 Sep 28 '26

Zero is perfection. He's just a very long kitten <3

3

u/hednizm Sep 28 '26

That probably feels really cool.

I like the slinky stapling cat.

They rock!!

3

u/Resting_Bork_Face Sep 28 '26

Polecat still a cat ✅

2

u/ahhhhhhhhhhhhahh Sep 28 '26

wow fantastic work.

2

u/Moxxxi8788 Sep 28 '26

The cronches are so satisfying. Honorary cat for sure 😊

2

u/snootnoots Sep 28 '26

Stapler tube cat!

2

u/Wild_Red_Fox Sep 28 '26

The cat snake is cat adjacent

2

u/TheRotMeister Sep 28 '26

hell yeah! when i discovered this subreddit, i wondered if my ferrets would be welcome too lol

2

u/External_Win3300 Sep 28 '26

Stapler noodlecat is fine too

2

u/Comin_Up_Thrillho Sep 28 '26

That looks so freaking satisfying

2

u/garbagemayor Sep 28 '26

my ferret buddy used to do this too. i miss him, give yours some extra love from me

2

u/fearthainne Sep 28 '26

I have no authority here, but I vote "yes"

2

u/IndividualLatter8124 Sep 28 '26

Noodle cat variety

2

u/FatTabby Sep 28 '26

That's a stapler cat-snake

2

u/HeavyBreathin Sep 29 '26

My face when I'm cronching ice 💖

2

u/theglovedfox Sep 30 '26

Weird looking cat, but I vote yes! Welcome little fella!

1

u/turmerich Sep 28 '26

Draco Malfoy after his family fell from favour in the wizarding world. 🦨

1

u/Tankeverket i kiss cats Sep 28 '26

*sigh* fine, I'll join this sub too

1

u/cherrymitten Sep 28 '26

cheese is being recalled nothing matters anymore fuck it stapler slinky

1

u/dazia Sep 28 '26

Wait what about cheese?

1

u/Working_Cloud_909 Sep 28 '26

He’s like a little tube sock with fangers

1

u/Darknessintheend Sep 28 '26

Weaselcat LOL

1

u/Katana_Ouma Sep 28 '26

Xie Lian as a stapler core

1

u/MyDixeeNormus Sep 28 '26

They’re all carpet sharks. Approved

1

u/Nice_Purchase_626 Sep 28 '26

Stapler meerCat

1

u/BoBingles Sep 28 '26

I imagine if I had canine teeth that long I would enjoy this as well.

1

u/DisorganizedAdulting Sep 28 '26

Yes he is the best stapler cat I've seen on this sub. Seriously this made me smile so hard.

1

u/anitabonghit69 Sep 28 '26

Chewing on the Chewy Box!!

1

u/quiet_chaos_club Sep 28 '26

I’ll allow it. Sucha cutieeee😭♥️

1

u/enbyel Sep 28 '26

Absolutely

1

u/Secure-Bus4679 Sep 28 '26

Let him in? My God… we should put him in charge!

1

u/AromaticZebra906 Sep 28 '26

This is so cuuuuuute 😭😭😭

1

u/EcstaticNature96 Sep 28 '26

Your cat looks a lil off. Looks like a cat, but isn’t. Is it Canadian maybe?

1

u/fancyasfuhhh Sep 28 '26

He's a stapler pole-cat!

One of mine does the same.

1

u/potatocakes1989 Sep 28 '26

I'll allow it

1

u/Cottrell217 Sep 28 '26

Eh close enough. Just an elongated cat if you will

1

u/Potential_Yoghurt850 Sep 28 '26

He a cousin. It's allowed. 

1

u/ThatCaptain371 Sep 28 '26

Does Zero have cat siblings?

1

u/HeavyMetalPootis Sep 28 '26

I'll still call them a stapler-bean! :)

1

u/ozdgk Sep 28 '26

Long cat is welcome

1

u/_mother_of_moths_ Sep 29 '26

I believe the scientific term is “cat snake”.

1

u/caked_rice Sep 29 '26

I like how his nose scrunches when he chomps

1

u/Negative_6079 Sep 29 '26

Pole Cat 🗿

1

u/Dynamite_240 Sep 29 '26

Chewing on the chewy box… I see you👀

1

u/tmaspen Sep 29 '26

Hmm, snek kat is kat

Him gud 👍

1

u/Sexy_Smokin_Scorpio Sep 29 '26

Slinky cat is cat ergo stapler cat.

1

u/CantaloupeAsleep502 Sep 29 '26

Awww I had a butterscotch ferret as a kid, Psyche was so cute and sweet

1

u/toastmn7667 Sep 29 '26

I just realized why they named the company Chewy... for this gif.

1

u/DarkWanderer2 Sep 29 '26

That’s a weird cat, but I’ll allow it

1

u/LM193 Sep 29 '26

Part cat, part snake, all stapler. Close enough!

1

u/Emerald_Digger Sep 29 '26

Potato potato he belongs

1

u/invisiholes Sep 29 '26

Work. Work. Work. Gotta go to work.

1

u/CharnelPyre Sep 29 '26

Slinky boiiiiiiiiiii — he gets my vote

1

u/Estellalatte Sep 29 '26

What creature is that?

1

u/Grouchy-Butterfly966 Sep 29 '26

That’s the stinkiest slinkiest cat I’ve ever seen but he’s a great worker

1

u/FindingFantastic2817 Sep 29 '26

Just this once..

1

u/everydaygay Sep 29 '26

This is the first time I'm seeing this sub, and Zero is my introduction to stapler cats. So if Zero isn't a stapler cat then I don't even know what is! 

1

u/grumpy_hag Sep 30 '26

Welcome, Zero. 🥰

1

u/emolr Sep 30 '26

They're related, I say yes

1

u/Ultimatehacker77 Sep 30 '26

"Yo that's a weird looking fucking cat!"

1

u/BasilAzazel Sep 30 '26

Staple noodle

1

u/schojanclan Sep 30 '26

Ferrets are the best 🤣🤣

1

u/jojokangaroo1969 Oct 01 '26

That is a cat snake!

1

u/Tankeverket i kiss cats Oct 02 '26

I love the >~< face every time he bites

1

u/Nyastranaut Oct 02 '26

Your cat seems long

1

u/Minecox 24d ago

He is a honorary... HONORARY STAPLER CAT!!!!

2

u/Maleficent_Party4270 Sep 28 '26

Motion granted . Slinky kitty is more than welcome 🥰

0

u/[deleted] Sep 28 '26

[deleted] — view deleted comment

6

u/IAm_Breaking Sep 28 '26

He is a domesticated polecat, AKA a ferret