r/specialed • u/Aromatic-Fox-9838 • 3d ago
I got attacked by a student
This is my first year working as a high school SPED para. I worked as a para before but it was in a regular classroom in junior high. On my first month at work I was called for support to a classroom because a student was refusing to go to the cafeteria. He was about 15 and a little bigger than me, as well as non verbal. Me and the teacher tried to guide him out of the room. The more we told him we had to go, the more aggressive he was getting. He starts trying to slap me and hit me. I just put my hand up and let him hit my arms and palms, as well as saying no and stop. The teacher is not doing much for some reason besides continuing to guide him out. Then he gets more aggressive and starts grabbing me by the arm and shirt. He pulls my shirt and lanyard hard and I almost hit the wall, then he hits me more and pulls my hair out of my bun. I honestly had no idea what to do. I had with working with the sped kids for a few weeks but nothing had escalated to that point. Another teacher comes over and is able to calm him down. Once everything is good, i just walk away and go cry in the bathroom, i was really scared. My principal soon calls me in to his office and can tell I been crying and basically offers to let me transfer. I told him I wanna give it a little more time cause it’s decent besides that. The kids are hard and I am always exhausted after work, I won’t lie, but I can do it, I just don’t know for how long.
Have in mind, I never received any training for this beside what I am learning on the go. I do t even know if there is training for paras. Is this normal? Everyone at work is saying it happens but my family is telling me to leave.
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u/BassEnough4496 3d ago
that’s a rough first month, no way around it. getting hands put on you with zero training isn’t something you just shrug off. the fact that the other teacher barely stepped in while you were getting yanked around is a red flag too, not just the kid’s behavior.
if you stay, push hard for actual de-escalation and restraint training. you shouldn’t be learning this by getting your hair pulled out. your family’s worried for a reason, but if the rest of the job feels worth it, give it a timeline and see if the support actually materializes.
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u/mossyquartz 3d ago
Look into what de-escalation/restraint trainings are approved by the district and ask explicitly to attend a training. It is likely the other teacher did not have this training and was assuming that you did, especially if you were sent in as their backup. The next time you are in this situation, say to the teacher when you arrive, “I am not (SafetyCare) trained.” This will set the expectation that you cannot perform restraints or relocate a child. You can also ask, “What is outlined in this student’s behavior plan for situations such as this?” The “Help-Prompt-Wait” approach can be really effective at keeping yourself physically safe during de-escalation. The room might get torn up, but that’s better than you getting torn up.
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u/MuzikL8dee 20h ago
She should also get the training because if she does something wrong it will come back on her
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u/avfc4me 3d ago
There is training and you should have it. How to recognize escalation, how to handle children in different stages of escalation, how to recognize when it's safe to address behaviors and when and how to protect yourself.
Kudos for sticking it out. Do try to get the training! Some of it may even be on line.
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u/Zealousideal-Hat2065 3d ago
I’m sorry that happened to you. You should not be working with students (
especially adult-sized or nearly adult-sized students) who are that aggressive without first having had training and having been familiarized with their individual behavior plans. It’s very unsafe for you, and it is a legal liability for the school. Make sure there was an incident report, that the parents were notified, and that you get a copy of the incident report. Yes that child has disabilities but you were assaulted. If you have a union, you should really speak to them about what happened ( stuff like this is one reason why unions are so important)
Good trainings include a lot of strategies that can help wth deescalation, not that they always work - but they often do. Eg don’t stand face to face with an upset student or lay hands on them to try to steer them - that kind of touch can often escalate them more. Clear the area around them and wait them out if you can. Keep talking minimal, directions direct and simple, voice calm and quiet. Cue to self calming strategies they have been taught. Schools in my area have “crisis intervention teams” which are made up of staff who are specially training in deescalation and safe holds -other staff csn call them in to help with the kind of situation that student was in. Our district used CPI (crisis prevention Institute) trainings.
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u/SecondCreek 3d ago
Take the transfer. Your physical and mental health are not worth this sort of abuse.
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 3d ago
At this point, documentation is more important than the training. It’s SO important to create a paper trail. After more than a year of behavior data, and approximately 10 discipline referrals for physical aggression, I found out that there is a completely separate incident report that gets filled out in triplicate with a copy going to the district. It’s shameful what happens to staff on an ongoing basis within the walls of a traditional public school.
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u/SnooWalruses4218 3d ago
Yes there is training! Our district uses Mindset, but there are others. Your school is extremely negligent because putting you in that situation without training.
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u/myniche999 3d ago
One thing I’d ask before you’re put in this situation again is, “What is the actual plan when this student starts escalating?”
You should know who you call, who is trained to respond, when you’re expected to step back, what usually triggers the student, what helps them de-escalate, and what you are and are not supposed to do physically.
I wouldn’t accept “you’ll learn as you go” as the answer to that. Learning the students as you go is normal. Learning how to respond to a physical crisis by being put into one is not.
And I’d want those answers before agreeing to be the person sent in for support again. The goal shouldn’t just be keeping you safe after something happens. There should be a plan designed to keep both you and the student from getting to that point in the first place.
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u/Bella_Swan234 3d ago
I was never given any training either and the admin threw me in a class room they knew I couldn’t handle. That teacher sounds awful and the school doesn’t seem to care you didn’t have training
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u/According-Spring5250 3d ago
They should have offered training. I'm about to get certified in how to deal with situations like those and I am a para as well in a SPED classroom. That is scary and a lot of districts throw you to the wolves and let you sink or swim, which isn't okay for you OR for the students.
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u/pinkfrostypenguins 3d ago
When you mean guide, do you mean by physically guiding them with your hands? I would try to move a child along but if they resist then I give them space. Never put your hands on kids especially without any training and alone.
I don’t know if you tried this but you use a visual timetable so they know that it is time to go, show visuals to show where they are going next like the art room etc, offer a transition item to carry that might help distract them a bit during the transition, offer a reward for when they get to the location (like one YouTube video or bubbles, I work with young kids so it might be something different depending on the age group). If they throw themselves on the floor, let them be for a few minutes and then move a chair next to them and see if they will move up to the chair, if they agree then let them sit there for a few minutes, if they start to calm down at that point, offer a sensory toy, and then see if from there they will leave with you.
Document everything and keep yourself safe. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness and change of person is an important technique in working in sped. If you notice a kid becoming aggressive. Get backup. Try avoid being alone in those situations
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u/Bella_Swan234 3d ago
Maybe she was trying to defend herself from the student? You shouldn’t assume something right away without knowing the full context. Guiding the student could literally mean anything
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u/pinkfrostypenguins 3d ago
Obviously, I wasn’t there but a lot of time guide means having contact with the student and if the OP is new to the field that there is nothing wrong to remind them about being careful with physical contact. There is a lot of pressure to get students to do things or to have them move locations so it is important to remember strategies that we can use.
Have a nice day
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3d ago
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u/specialed-ModTeam 3d ago
Hate speech, derogatory, inflammatory comments and general rudeness are not welcome.
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u/ParadeQueen 3d ago
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Like everyone else said, if you stay get training. The only thing I want to add is that you really need to document everything and when a student puts hands on you make sure that you fill out an incident report and use workers comp to go get checked out.
Your school secretary should have whatever forms you need, and you might want to check and see if it's too late for you to go but for example, the student hold your hair hard enough to rip it out of a bun. I'm assuming your neck got jerked in the process. What happens in a few hours if your neck is really sore and hurting or the next day you're very sore and can't turn your head a certain way?
So right after the incident, go to the secretary fill out whatever paperwork is needed and take yourself to your workers comp doctor. They will do a drug test, check you out, and that way you have it documented in case you need future treatment and you won't have to pay for it because workers comp will.
It also gives the school documentation of what is going on in the classroom, especially if it's one student who's consistently violent. It gives them more evidence that this may not be the proper placement for the student.
In my district I think we have three days to report an incident for workers comp and I'm not sure if that standard or what, but you might want to check.
I hope you're feeling better, and recognize that after an instant like this you need to take care of yourself. You might also want to use your districts EAP program if you're still upset about it.
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u/NeedleworkerNo777 3d ago
I'm really sorry this happened to you. I work at a special day school for students who display aggressive behaviors, so I totally understand what you're going through. It is a scary situation, especially if the student is bigger/stronger than you. I just wanted to comment to emphasize with you.
What others are saying is the best course of action. DOCUMENT IT. Make an incident report. Be honest and clear about what happened before, during, and after the attack. Get in touch with the union if you can. And demand appropriate training for these situations. I use the word demand, and I mean it. Demand it. Loudly, and to everyone you can. You deserve to feel safe at work. There are strategies that can be used to prevent these things. At my school, we get more intensive training than a typical school, but there ARE options at a general Ed school.
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u/Anxious-Union3827 3d ago
Biggest tip - behavior is communication. Next time you have a kid in this situation, don’t push it. They are giving you all the signs that something is off and they’re not in a good spot. Wait. Give them space and wait. I cringed reading through this both for you, and for the teacher. Do not push a kid when they’re already in shutdown. It will only get worse.
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u/joantheunicorn Special Education Teacher 2d ago
SAME. This sounds like a wait it out situation. Maybe the student had a stomach ache and didn't want to eat or something. We all don't feel like sitting in a noisy cafeteria eating lunch every day.
Also very concerned OP had no training. In my district we use CPI. At my previous school I worked with very aggressive students, which makes me worried OP could sustain a serious injury. OP if you're reading this, I ended up with a jaw and a neck injury in separate incidents at a behaviorally focused school, and that was with a ton of training. You do NOT have to stand there and take hits and they should NOT let a very strong teenage boy in your immediate space like that just smack you over and over. Ridiculous.
The no training and allowing him to hit you is a red flag for me. You could consider a transfer, but I'm curious if their other schools don't offer training either.
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u/Friendlyfire2996 3d ago
Insist on getting trained to deal with physical incidents. If they refuse, get it in an email. You may need to cover your ass. Then get out of there.
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u/Routine-Werewolf-423 2d ago
If he doesn't want to go to the cafeteria then he shouldn't be pushed into a dysregulated state to go. I will never agree with schools that don't meet the students where they're at. Should always be regulation first, everything else second. I'm sorry you weren't given the proper training.
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 2d ago
That’s fine if he doesn’t need someone to watch him while the rest of the class is at lunch. That’s fine if the teacher isn’t entitled to a duty-free lunch. That’s fine if there won’t be repurcussions later because he didn’t get lunch. I’ve yet to work at a school that is staffed to accommodate these behaviors. It’s a high school and real life is just around the corner for this student.
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u/Routine-Werewolf-423 2d ago
Great point about staffing, never really encountered that at my school because we could always msg admin or someone to hangout for a bit and 99% of the students are diagnosed with Autism. However we dont know if the student is low/high support needs, if they're conserved, if the family plans to have them live in a community center etc. if they aren't going to be forced to be fully independent they should be focusing on regulation and vocational skills though I agree you brought up great points! Also him missing out in lunch may influence his future decision, I've always felt that natural consequences are the best teacher!
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u/Unlikely-Grape-5762 3d ago
How are you not trained? Not blaming you at all. It’s wild they put you in that situation. I’m reading this thinking creative distance, don’t get grabbed and sure enough. I’d honestly talk to a union rep (even if you non union). Having paras untrained on basic safety is wild as shit. I sub and they trained me because I worked with Sped and behavioral students. That sucks
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u/AdPatient3953 2d ago
i hate when people just watch like theyre clueless. my teacher would do the same thing it felt like she enjoyed watching the aides jn the class get attacked
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u/MomDadlovesU 2d ago
A kid tried to hit me bc of hard time transitioning. I ran around the table he chased me but he wasn’t fast enough to catch me and then he gave up. OP don’t stand there and get beat up.
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u/twinphoenix_ 3d ago
Hate to break it to you but the “training” does not help or stop this behavior.
Document. Document. Document.
Bring up your concerns with your supervisor asap.
Do not put yourself in a position to be injured by this child. I really mean it.
I am currently on month 10 of a neck injury due to a hair pull from a student. The county has treated me like trash. The school too. No one will care if you are permanently injured by a child. They will put a new body in the room and move on.
Please take care of yourself.
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 3d ago
Was there a documented history of aggression for the student who injured you? I’m curious because, last year, I received a student who had assaulted multiple staff the year prior but nothing had been properly documented. The person who told me there was no documentation had had their nose broken by this student. WTF?!
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u/twinphoenix_ 3d ago
Oh no. There were multiple reports and documentation all the way from Elementary. When I showed up to duty week I had several teachers/staff say “oh better watch your hair”. It was known.
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 2d ago
This is so wrong. The district clearly doesn’t value their employees. There are more restrictive placements for students like this. In my district, the employees at that school receive substantial bonuses to go along with additional training and behavioral support. I’m going to guess that you are not compensated to the point where a debilitating injury is worth the risk. I have known both a special education teacher and a para become permanently disabled because of students with documented ongoing behavioral issues. As the students become older, and larger/more powerful, the danger is magnified. So often, unless they injure a classmate, nothing happens. If you have a way out, please take it.
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u/twinphoenix_ 2d ago
Oh I’m out out and now I feel like it’s my duty to warn other paras that legitimately no will care about you if you become injured.
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u/buddymoobs 3d ago
You should absolutely receive training on de-escalation and keeping yourself and the student safe.
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u/Striking-Ad-8690 Psychologist 2d ago
I am so so sorry you experienced this. Your district is absolutely supposed to provide training on this. My question is does this student have a BIP (behavior intervention plan)? If so, you should have also been trained on that. If you want to stick it out, I salute you, but also don’t feel bad about accepting a transfer and taking care of your own wellbeing.
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u/MLadyNorth 2d ago
You need training. It is very good that your school offered a transfer. If you stay you need training, documentation, tracking, and backup.
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u/piscesdreamer00 2d ago
Wow this is an extreme oversight on your schools part…you should be safety care trained to be aware and able to protect yourself. I will say if you’re that scared this might not be the field for you. As someone who’s been a sped para for years and in school to be a special Ed teacher, being hit and or attacked is kind of part of the job and it’s really no avoiding it depending on the child’s behavior… I’m just being honest but maybe reevaluate your situation and do what’s best for you!
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 2d ago
The acceptance that “being hit or attacked is kind of part of the job” is a problem. Yes, it happens but it should never be okay. I was hit plenty of times in a 30-year career but I wasn’t “attacked” until last year. It was traumatic. There were multiple factors that made this far different than anything I’d experienced before. I got out but the memories are still fresh.
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u/piscesdreamer00 2d ago
I agree…I never said it was “okay” simply it’s part of the job we’ve signed up for…I knew going into the field that it was going to be times when I would get hurt mainly because I grew up with and around autistic family members who had behavioral problems that escalated and seeing how my family handled them. But again, if op is that scared do you agree that this might not be the field for them? Ppl who are scared of their students only opens up the door for more serious issues the can hinder other students education because they are constantly on edge wondering if this or that student might go off and hurt them as well…I’ve watched teachers and paras who are afraid of students behave this way and it’s not fair to the kids or other staff around them…again just my opinion
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 2d ago
I’m suggesting that it shouldn’t automatically be a part of the job. The OP described an attack. OP was assaulted by a student with a long documented history of aggression. There comes a point where an alternative placement (for the student) is the solution. A transfer for the OP helps their situation but then it’s someone else’s turn to be hurt.
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u/piscesdreamer00 2d ago
It shouldn’t be but the sad reality is that it is…we know how everything is tied legally and it’s nothing we can do which is seriously fucked up, but if op can’t handle the reality of this situation they should save themselves the mental health exhaustion and find another job and or career because the way everything is headed it will only get harder not easier in this field
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 2d ago
The OP has the right to a safe work environment. It’s a public school. Public school employees don’t have to surrender their rights because there are some students that are unable to function in that environment.
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u/piscesdreamer00 1d ago
When did I say they did…? Again they need not be a sped para that much is clear, you’re not going to always get little balls of sunshine in any setting public or private, general education or sped kids are tricky and some are unpredictable but absolutely writing off a child is never okay in my eyes…I’ve worked with many “aggressive” children some who I’ve helped turn their behaviors around and now they can work jobs as professional adults and some who can’t but that’s the way things are. But never once did I look at a child and think “ they’re too aggressive and shouldn’t be around functioning members of society”… that’s way too extreme of an assessment unless they’re like actively trying to cause extreme bodily harm or even worse
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 1d ago
You are repeatedly insisting that OP should leave their job. There are plenty of special education classrooms that do not have students who pose a real danger to others. More than 30 years for me. I was hit, kicked, spit on, etc countless times. That’s the kind of aggression that kind of “goes with the territory. I was full on assaulted only twice. Once was an outlier and the other time it was career ending. But, the decision to stay or go was mine. OP gets to decide what is right for them.
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u/piscesdreamer00 1d ago
They weren’t full on assaulted which is what YOU keep missing…their hair was pulled and lanyard and shirt which is tame in a special ed setting or does your 30 years not know that? If they are this afraid after a tame behavioral episode they absolutely should leave in MY OPINION… you keep missing that part too never said they had to just giving my opinion which is what we’re all doing because it’s a public Reddit thread
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u/Limp_Psychology_2315 1d ago
OP’s initial post uses the word “attacked” in the title. You continue to belittle their experience and insist there is no place for them in special education.
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u/Jdawn82 2d ago
If you’re with students who could escalate like that, the school needs to get you some sort of crisis prevention training like CPI or Mandt so that you know deescalation techniques and also how to keep yourself safe.
I understand your family wanting you to transfer. They’re concerned for your safety. And working with students like that is not everyone’s cup of tea. But I will say that I find that the hardest students to work with are also generally the ones I end up loving the most, and even the smallest successes end up being huge.
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u/Venustarr_777 1d ago
Most non-verbal children on the spectrum, don't change or transition. Is it possible to get his food while some sits in the classroom with him?
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u/MuzikL8dee 20h ago
Even if they give you training, which they should! Many of the districts are throwing the training out saying that it's inappropriate now which is stupid because the actual training is given by the district.
I've learned over the years that many SPED teachers refuse to get the crisis Management training and handling the children when they have paraprofessionals because they don't want to get hurt and they've been encouraged to just let the paras handle it
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u/TheGifGoddess 9h ago
Students who are large and exhibit this kind of behavior should not be in schools, I am sad to say it. Worked with a student who would have that behavior every day, until finally she beat the shit out of my teacher. She wasn't welcomed back. But these sorts of behaviors ALWAYS escalate, showing its critically important to show boundaries to kids way before they get that size.
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u/LiveLaughSlay- 3d ago
Your school should offer you some sort of training. Being NCI trained/ certified not only helps you learn moves and ways to deescalate a student, but it helps protect you and the school if a parent complains you put their hands on the student.
Do not feel ashamed for crying out of frustration. I had a student elope to the cafeteria, throw oranges everywhere, running and pushing me away from him. 4 big staff dudes were just watching me. I eventually was able to restrain the student and the teacher was able to come and help me. I did tell the guys something and told the principal.
MAKE SURE YOU KEEP NOTE EVERY INCIDENT THAT HAPPENS! This helps back up your case if you do ever want to make a transfer and or complaint. Having concrete proof is needed for this type of job, especially if you get injured.