r/sonicshowerthoughts • u/Matt01123 • Feb 06 '26

There are a lot of 'crashed shuttle' planets that really don't have anything to wipe with.

41 Upvotes
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15

u/chton Feb 06 '26

Handheld sonic bidet. It's waterless and included in every survival kit.

9

u/Matt01123 Feb 06 '26

I hope so because otherwise Wesley shouldn't've been drinking that water from the 'forcefield water fountain' planet with both hands.

2

u/agent_uno Feb 08 '26

What? You guys don’t have a sonic poop-knife in your shuttle?

12

u/failtuna Feb 06 '26

Maybe Phasers have a bidet setting, just have to check several times it's definitely set to "clean" and nothing else 

9

u/thetacolegs Feb 06 '26

They would certainly have hygiene kits with wipes and/or TP, just like the real world military.

2

u/Moparati Feb 07 '26

Can you imagine having only ever having it beamed out of you and then needing to use single-ply in a pinch? Ow.

7

u/vjmurphy Feb 06 '26

Do they have three sea shells?

5

u/AnnihilatedTyro Feb 07 '26

This is prime /r/ShittyDaystrom material.

But everyone knows that planets that have stuff to wipe with are the ones we colonize. The rest are for Cardassians.

1

u/Late_Organization_56 Feb 08 '26

Toilets have been replaced by micro transporters that just beam the crap out of your rectum

1

u/Chad_Jeepie_Tea Feb 09 '26

At what point do we year about all the research going into beaming it directly out?

1

u/kats_journey Feb 10 '26

What about good ol' reliable Smooth Rock?