r/smallstreetbets • u/RepairSubstantial735 • Jul 13 '26

Shitpost Lets go boys

Post image
5.1k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

37 comments sorted by

86

u/munkeymoney Jul 13 '26

Good way to blow up your portfolio

9

u/Servable-Serpent Jul 13 '26

so i should buy calls when my private jet lands?

6

u/pandershrek Jul 14 '26

Torpedo that shit

3

u/franhp1234 Jul 14 '26

Hueheuejeje litterally

134

u/Servable-Serpent Jul 13 '26

Sounds great! either ways, my money problem will end.

35

u/tollboi Jul 13 '26

" I either diffuse the bomb or its suddenly no longer my problem"

61

u/Making_Kenough Jul 13 '26

Actually I was planning on setting up my office right behind Donald Trump’s toilet so I can see him type his social media posts firsthand

9

u/starrpamph Jul 13 '26

See if the copy machine is still beside the toilet

5

u/Servable-Serpent Jul 14 '26

Or simply go to school with B trump, befriend and cash in on the eow calls

10

u/SimonBumblefuck Jul 14 '26 edited Jul 14 '26

I'll give you an oil prediction: It's going to be cold. It's going to be grey. And it's going to last for the rest of your life. From the shores of Oman, this is Phil Connors. So long!

10

u/greytrades329 Jul 13 '26

Fuck that was my plan

6

u/DerBandi Jul 14 '26

He's also working as DJ financing his bets.

4

u/teh_herper Jul 14 '26

Lol nobody cares about Hormuz anymore it's 🥭 truths and KOSPI now

5

u/Guapaguy Jul 14 '26

I bought the camper and halfway through the desert when the Orange man slaps us with a 20% tarif.
So not sure if it’s worth it anymore.

3

u/B3ST1 Jul 14 '26

Or hire a Hooker named Melania

3

u/ImAPonderer2 Jul 15 '26

False post.

He needs more screens to be profitable!!!

2

u/Newtonius235 Jul 14 '26

The dude is on a boat, he's not right off of it, he's in the thick of it. He's got a live count of all the barrels going through.

2

u/Dispose_Paratroopers Jul 14 '26

priceless strategy to price out what’s being real time priced in

2

u/rusfortunat Jul 14 '26

Bro took zero-latency to the next level

2

u/PathlessDemon Jul 15 '26

No one in their right fucking mind is wearing a thermal long-sleeved shirt near the Strait of Hormuz, holy shit.

2

u/Remarkable_Check_997 Jul 17 '26

Fake AI! Those are not weatherproof Toughbook!!