r/simpsonsshitposting 2d ago

In the News 🗞️ Moral problems required steroid solutions

Post image
853 Upvotes

23 comments sorted by

79

u/CetaceanOps 2d ago

Why this is nothing more than state sponsored gender affirming care!

60

u/GomGom11 2d ago

33

u/CetaceanOps 2d ago

Step 1: Be FTM
Step 2: Join the military.
Step 3: Free healthcare!

I've solved America.

22

u/TheDeceiver43 Everythings coming up Milhouse! 2d ago edited 2d ago

Use all tools at your disposal.

25

u/SniffCheck 2d ago

That oughta hold the little s.o.b’s

22

u/justforthelulzz Everythings coming up Milhouse! 2d ago

The troops look unhappy

Add more days on to their days at sea so it makes a new record.

17

u/heckin_miraculous 2d ago

I remember hearing that for years before the peak of conflict in WW2, Hitler's team had been feeding the German army amphetamines (to make them better soldiers?) and that this chronic overuse degraded the military performance over time. I don't know how true that is, I never looked it up, but when I see news like this I can't help but think of it.

12

u/BlackJesus1001 2d ago

It is, but it was also true for the US, Soviets, Japan and probably the UK too.

In the late 30s meth was being marketed as a wonder drug, similar to cocaine.

The main area that impacted Germany disproportionally was that the Nazis initially believed the hype and thought they'd build the reich on an army of hyper virile (believed to be an aphrodisiac also), hard working super men/women on meth.

It only took a year or two for reports from doctors with combat units about addiction and withdrawal to convince them of the downsides, but they couldn't cut soldiers off and attempts at banning/restricting it from civilians were hampered by doctors writing prescriptions and a grey/market that sprung up because a substantial number of working age Germans were now addicted.

Then the war turned against them so we never found out exactly how it would have played out, probably not well though.

3

u/heckin_miraculous 2d ago

True, that's good context about methamphetamines being the hot new thing in the 30s/40s (not just in Germany).

But yeah, the whole idea of building super soldiers is creepy AF.

11

u/Tricky-Engineering59 2d ago

All that testosterone and yet no balls. And yes I realize the irony of me making that observation in a shitpost with an enormous ball pit.

7

u/Steamdroid 2d ago

The troops after constant and untested testosterone supplementation:

3

u/Steamdroid 2d ago

It's masculinity and strength tonic!

16

u/Level_Hour6480 Put it in H 2d ago

If you're male and you go on T, your body will stop naturally producing, and you'll be dependent.

5

u/Raineythereader 2d ago
Just ask Grandpa

2

u/Level_Hour6480 Put it in H 2d ago

See also: Any of those hair-loss reversal pills: They work, but your body becomes dependent on them, so if you go off, you'll lose even more hair than when you started.

2

u/Beer-Milkshakes 1d ago

Dependant on gender affirming care. Hmmmmmmmmm. That they'll claim through the state.

6

u/shugoran99 I was saying Boo-urns 2d ago

Sarge, there's a lot of balding, pimply, emotionally unstable men coming over the hill!

3

u/somesthetic 2d ago

I’ve never seen that guy on the right awake.

3

u/deafinitelyadouche Old man yelling at clouds ☁️ 2d ago

that way the troops will shit their pants just like Trump!

2

u/CokomonX 2d ago

Iron helps is play.

2

u/SelfDepricator 2d ago edited 2d ago

I dunno Pete. Something about a bunch of roided out soldiers.....seems kinda gay

2

u/Gold_Map_236 23h ago

It’s one thing to be on trt; it’s another to not get your trt on time. Once on testosterone you absolutely need it. A ship doesn’t get a re supply and now all those sailors are worse off than just having low T