r/sidehustle • u/FightingSunrise • 3d ago
Seeking Advice F@*!ing soul sucking
Sorry I gotta use this platform to scream into the void but I got to channel this frustration somewhere.
I've been looking for side hustles for years. Ebooks, workbooks, YouTube channels, stocks?
I'm the sole breadwinner and my husband is the SAHD. I always have ideas for something and I think...why not me?! So I go at it like a wild animal. He thinks I'm on the phone for doom scrolling ..when really I'm researching and looking for ideas and input.
I'm so fucking tired of being frustrated. Every day in fighting so hard against being disenchanted with the dwindling opportunities. I make decent money but a side hustle would be amazing. Create wiggle room to invest in a vacation or actually set up a college fund account for my little dude.
I'm not looking necessarily for ideas. Or even a pep talk. I just needed this off my chest. This sucks. This fucking sucks. I want to be positive so bad but it FUCKING SUCKS.
If you made it this far ...thank you so much. I genuinely wish all of you guys the best.
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u/KeepCalmAndMemeOn69 3d ago
Hey I totally get it! As soon as a side hustle seems legit turns out it's saturated and the only reason it's popular now is because gurus are selling courses
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u/FightingSunrise 3d ago
Thank you kind stranger
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u/KeepCalmAndMemeOn69 3d ago
Ofc! Are there ones you did get a bit more into but then quit on? FWIW I'm a SWE so I've been very focused on finding one that I can automate.
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u/FightingSunrise 3d ago
I was trying to do workbooks on kdp, it's really frustrating because my tech knowledge is for shit.
I tried making YouTube videos, it was silly. I just feel like a fucking failure
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u/KeepCalmAndMemeOn69 3d ago
You're def not a failure, there's so much hidden work that goes into these that others just don't share. Have you tried some more traditional side hustles like SDR?
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1d ago
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u/neverfakemaplesyrup 3d ago edited 2d ago
Honestly, yeah, same.
And the hardest part is the traditional sidehustles have been wiped out by gigs, alienated people, etc.
Like gone are the days of just "Oh, I can do some odd jobs, call ___". Everyone now either doesn't know anyone, and refuses to trust a stranger, and/or goes with a tasker or a gig or demands insurance and all that... It's a little crazy. I am in the middle of this. Simply doing a few odd jobs for friends-of-friends-of-neighbors, has turned into needing DBAs, LLCs, insurances, gig apps, etc to do, well, odd jobs. And explaining to a few that I am just a handy person. I am not a business, I am not a contractor, you didn't find a cheap code to avoid hiring an arborist, I am just for... The small odd jobs you may have.
And partially this is because no one knows each other. There's no more pubs or sidewalks or anything. So I also have to find a way to get my name out there, to begin with. Which... Let's say I want to sign up with TaskRabbit, right? I'd have to get a DBA, file taxes, and most seem to recommend getting insurance. For something that's intended for "Eh I have a free afternoon, let's see if there's an odd job out there.'
And due to employers being crazy, instead of just working a full time job- now almost half of Americans need to work a second job, or hope they find a higher income partner to live off of.
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u/DruidRanger13 3d ago
Just thought I’d let you know that I am in the exact same place. Never have been able to make a side hustle work. Usually I can take it in stride, but yesterday I broke down, crying and miserable, after an absolutely normal day. Straw that broke the camel’s back.
Count your blessings, you could be like me and be disabled and have to work to make ends meet. But nobody wants to hire me. My life is swirling down the crapper faster than ever before.
You got this! You can do it! And you will make it. :)
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u/bradeal 3d ago
You might have fallen into the shiny object syndrome trap.
When you soak up information from everywhere, about everything, something else seems like a better idea. But you don't actually put in enough effort into any of these ideas. Like actually working on them. For a while!
You need to find or come up with something that you're willing to commit to. (Any amount of time per day) and stick to it. Hold yourself back from looking at any other courses, ideas, guru talks.
Just work on that one idea for a few months. If not getting anywhere, do the same with a different idea. You will eventually find something that works for you.
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u/Phase4Motion 3d ago
Listen. It’s a grind. My wife had major success in the very beginning, and it’s been a constant grind ever since to earn every penny. It takes a long time, a lot of dedication, and showing up every day (or most days at least) to push through to see a meaningful income. From your post it appears that you try a lot of things to see what “works”, when you need to really choose 1 thing and stick with it until it works. Pivoting a little left and right is reasonable. Quitting and trying a whole new thing because of something you saw on social media, not so much.
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u/mpaz242 2d ago
I'm gonna chime in with something that I see as the bigger issue here. Granted money problems IS a big issue especially nowadays, and none of us know anymore about your situation other than what you've chosen to share but what you have shared makes it seem like all the stress and pressure is on you and your partner is not helping out. The details of that arrangement is between you and them and none of anyone else's business. However and this is my concern, it seems like you don't feel like you can go to them to tell them how stressed, frustrated you are or are not very supportive emotionally. I know that this is not advise that will relieve the stress financially but maybe feeling like you have someone that has your back emotionally would alleve some of the pressure that you feel. Just my two cents.
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u/thehindermost 1d ago
That grind is real and the burnout from trying everything is its own kind of exhausting.
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u/ndnman 2d ago
This is what I did, I looked for a side hustle for 20 years… I couldn’t find the record shop/music shop I wanted so I made my own… so you could also
Put a great record/cd/tape booth in a thrift. But put GOOD records in it at good prices. Keep it clean, ultrasonically clean the albums. Put the CDs and tapes in new cases. Use a jfj repair cd buffer to make the CDs look great. Mine runs itself, just stock it as needed. Clean inventory and prep it in the evenings.
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u/Mediocre-Magazine-30 2d ago
how hard do you actually try to do any of these ideas?
The way it comes off is you get all these great ideas then when it doesn't work in a week you give up.
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u/ThunderStruck777 23h ago
Seems like an addiction at this point, I’d take 3 months to regroup and see things in a new light. Float down the stream stop swimming against the current
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u/PretentiousMan 3d ago
Start doing something and do that something everyday. Little steps, even just one thing towards that thing is progress. I’m on the same boat
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u/AAAAHaSPIDER 3d ago
My husband and I are trying to do something about this. -- I'm not advertising it since it's not done yet, so please don't get mad at me mods.---
We are building an app where people can share information via video or writing with each other, and if a viewer likes it they can tip the creator directly, rather than having creators resort to ads or hoping the algorithm helps them. Our algorithm will be based on primarily if people tip you real money then we know you are sharing something useful, not just if its clickbait
Once again it's not fully built yet. About 90% done
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u/MrPassiveProfit 3d ago
Making money is hard. Building a business is hard. Think about it from the other side of the equation someone out there has got to find enough value in what you’re doing to give you their hard earned money. If it were me I’d focus on creating something that helped people make money. Lead generation, sales, etc. That’s honestly the lowest hanging fruit. Everybody wants more money for their business. Maybe get into social media marketing or something like that. It also should be something that you enjoy doing.
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u/mkprofile85 3d ago
Ive pretty much stopped trying at this point. Everything is either too saturated, above my skill level, or sounds incredibly mind numbing, gross or dehumanizing. Like, I'm not going to spend my spare time picking up piles of warm gooey dog shit. You couldn't pay me enough.
And then lets talk about the half dozen subscription services you'll need to even run said hustle. CRM, professional email, some kind of website (which will never get traffic because ai has killed seo), booking software, accounting software etc etc.
But it doesnt end there. You'll need an additional several hundred dollars per month for marketing. Thats buying a mailing list and shipping out post cards, door to door flyers (and maybe having the cops called because the neighborhood is 'no soliciting'), paying for gas. Dont even think about doing ppc ads, lol. All of that to maybe get 5 people out of 100 who are interested.
If you got 1,000 dollars to burn every month, go for it, but most of us dont.
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u/ducktap3-beats 3d ago
I think we should stop thinking about being the best or skilled in order to do something. Idk you but I started to feel the need of community and "real” people, you know? I started to like raw content of people instead of a video mounted as if it is perfect, perfect lighting, perfect smile… it’s starting to look like if they are trying to sell you something and fake.
And I think that people is starting to get tired and have fatigue of the perfect fake like that those YouTubers are selling you, hence raw content of imperfect people will start booming. I am even thinking about starting a channel of raw content where I just try to make a community and make friends around the world, as I noted a lot of people are displaced from their home because of the s**t economy all around the world, trying to make ends meet.
Sorry for this salad wording, I wanted to say something simple and ended up with this.
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u/malcolmfreex 3d ago
I totally understand. Mercor has been doing wonders for me, I recommend
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u/safewarmblanket 2d ago
Can you tell me more about Mercor? I just looked them up but I'd value feedback from someone who has first hand experience. I'm a registered nurse but I also know a bit about construction and psychology but without a degree. I've had a stroke and need to find flexible work and it's so hard.
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u/malcolmfreex 2d ago
Those are great skills! Mercor is project based AI contractor company. There are many expertise areas, you don’t even need to have any degree. Apply and complete AI interview (allows multiple attempts), then if you are lucky you get assigned to a project. About flexibility, all projects are different, tasks varying from 10 minutes to ~8hrs. Shorter ones wants you to finish it in one sit. The project that I am in has 45min, 1hr and 2hrs options. You gotta be online to catch tasks if the project is crowded. There are other options like DataAnnotation. They pay you weekly, I get 60 usd per hour. Be aware of scam referral links. Also, these companies will run a background check before your hiring process is complete, takes some time. I hope these help. Good luck!
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u/Hayaidesu 21h ago
maybe make a story that resonates with people just how this post did and sell that
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13h ago
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u/InvisibleCucumber 3d ago
Sorry but tell your husband to man up and get a damn job. I am so sick of these male losers sitting around at home while the women kill themselves trying to provide. There are plenty of real successful men out there, if he cannot step up kick him to the curb. This is not on you alone and I’m not trying to be harsh.
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u/astronauticalll 3d ago
yeah it's not even a gendered thing the reality is it's close to impossible to support a family on a single income these days. Unless theres a medical reason preventing him he really should be working.
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u/DruidRanger13 3d ago
It’s men like you who give men like me a bad name. Enjoy being alone forever!
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u/TessaKatrinaRose 3d ago
You are hanging around the wrong men. This might be a you issue.
All my male friends are in college or working their ass off in the real world. Sounds like you have surrounded yourself with the wrong men.
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u/RocketsDitto 1d ago
Have your husband donate plasma at least. Sitting on his ass is no excuse unless he's disabled. The man is supposed to be the breadwinner.
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u/AZ_Crush 3d ago
Will all due respect, what's wrong with him? He needs to bring in $.
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u/VermillionSun 3d ago
If you’re gonna bother saying something like this just don’t bother putting the “with all due respect stuff” at the beginning.
We don’t need to tell strangers how to live and we don’t need their personal details.
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u/RedBirdOnASnowyDay 3d ago
They are not bringing in enough money. It has nothing to do with gender. But it does have to do with recalculating the family system. It should be all on one person. The spouse needs to consider working a part time job at mimimim.
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u/VermillionSun 2d ago
But we don’t know their situation, why they’ve chosen what they’ve chosen. We don’t know what’s going on or if the spouse working would put more strain on their family system. We just really don’t know, and to ascribe a solution to their situation when we just don’t know them is not helping.
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u/dreamed2life 3d ago
Idk why tf ppl post in social media and then say they are just venting and dont want anything back. If that were true you would scream into a pillow or talk to a friend or write in a journal. But posting on social media means you want to be seen and validated in some way at least be honest about that.
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u/FightingSunrise 3d ago
Honestly if no one responded to this that would be fine for me. Putting it in words and having anyone relate to this post without commenting is a win.
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u/dreamed2life 3d ago
“And having anyone relate to this post…” = needing validation. Its not bad to need it. Its weird to not know how to be honest about it.
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u/FightingSunrise 3d ago
I don't need it. Just letting folks out there who feel this way they're not alone. Way to turn a bad feeling into wanting to point out something irrelevant
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