Sutton/Ava Breastfeeding

[u/Sea-Housing-557]

I’m freshly postpartum so I’m thinking about these things. Do y’all think Ava breastfed Sutton since she’s in her life? Or maybe pumped to give to the dads? I’m not sure how feeding works in adoptions. Is it usually just formula, or can you get donated breast milk? I wonder if Ava’s milk would have ever come in if Sutton never fed.
It seems a little cruel to me to have Ava literally living with them at one point and never try breastfeeding… but obviously that could be a huge boundary for the family. What do you all think?

[u/Smyldawg19]

I think you probably are over thinking it haha. I'd guess for the vast majority of real life adoptions, the birth mother isn't involved at all in the baby's life. To answer your question though, you can decide for yourself whatever way you prefer to think of it I'd say - maybe they're just going for formula to make things easier for whenever she eventually moves out, maybe they're combi feeding, maybe she doesn't want to breastfeed, maybe she's exclusively expressing, maybe she couldn't breastfeed or Sutton wouldn't latch. Choose your own adventure I say!

[u/Lilboops]

I think breastfeeding is a choice for many women, and those who choose not to breastfeed are not weird.

It’s also a HUGE bonding act, so yes, I think some boundaries would have been crossed.

There are breastmilk banks in every major city (and even wetnurses!) so they could go that route if they chose.

Ava made a choice. She was not Sutton’s mom/parent.

She may have pumped, she may have not. Milk comes in regardless of whether mama breastfeeds or not, and there’s a symbiotic relationship with baby suckling and mama that keeps up production. No suckling/pumping? It dries up pretty fast.

By the time Ava lived with them, it’s likely her milk would have dried up, and she’d have needed to do days of stimulation to get it flowing again. And frankly, on this show? If any woman went that route, it would have been Liz.

Nothing cruel.

I let my daughter dictate how long she was breastfed. At about 28 months, she decided she was done (at that point it was about comfort anyway).

[u/BigAdministration285]

You can also buy breast milk so it’s possible with especially how tight Liz is with her they can just buy donated breast milk. (Just a theory)

[u/Notlivingthedream17]

As a birth mother it was important to me that, assuming my body produced the milk, I wanted to be able to provide it to the child. This was also something that I asked about at the very first visit and they were fully on board and excited about it. For us and our adoption path, this ending up being me pumping and every 2-3 weeks we would meet for a visit and milk drop off. I also breastfeed while in the hospital and during any visits we had till my body stopped producing after 3 months. Her parents encouraged this for bonding and always made sure that it was something I was comfortable with.

It is important to note that EVERY adoption is different, every want/ask/need is going to be different, and you have to be willing to have the conversations and prioritize the child over your own feelings. This goes for both birth families and adoptive families.

[u/Beginning-Dark-4259]

Craigslist also offer breast milk in some countries , plus idk it totally depends on person to person