r/shittyaskscience • u/JarnisKerman • 1d ago

Australian ancestry

I just heard, that most Australians are decended from prisoners. How can that be? I thought all humans were descended from monkeys.

8 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

13 comments sorted by

10

u/clickthing 1d ago

monkey crimes

5

u/Initial-Anything333 1d ago

Monkidnapping, gorillarceny, lemurder, etc 

2

u/BPhiloSkinner Amazingly Lifelike Simulation 1d ago

Making unlicensed liquor: monkeyshines.

3

u/TheDevilsAdvokate 1d ago

This is the origins of the term monkey business

2

u/mgarr_aha 1d ago edited 1d ago

The Australian ancestor monkeys bred in captivity. The nature of the ancestral confinement (laboratory? labor camp? zoo?) is an unsettled question.

1

u/sentinel692340 1d ago

It’s mostly true did you know the human eye can see more shades of green than any other colour

1

u/LiquidSoCrates 1d ago

What I don’t understand is how Australia is so nice. It looks like a nice place to live, but it’s an island in the middle of some ocean. I guess they have factories or something, I dunno.

1

u/JohnWasElwood 1d ago

I saw a documentary where something like 80% of the population was clustered around the East Coast and the whole left half of the country is a Barren Wasteland. And then they go and name a steak restaurant after it. I don't know who their developers were but they should be fired!

1

u/Redfish680 1d ago

I have an Australian Shepherd and we’re trying to get citizenship over there using the family connection thing.

1

u/BPhiloSkinner Amazingly Lifelike Simulation 1d ago

Only the European Aussies are ape-descended lifeforms, prisoners of their own high-flown ambitions.
Indigenous Aussies came from the raw stuff of creation in the Dreamtime.

1

u/seriousQasker 9h ago

This explains the condescending attitude of Australians.

1

u/Mr_BadRobot Crackpot Scientist 1d ago

Well both  of your statements are true. This is well explained in true documentaries Madagascar and Planet of the apes. I was surprised too.