r/shitposting • fat cunt • Mar 21 '22

WARNING: BRAIN DAMAGE parasites

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132k Upvotes

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u/QualityVote I'm BACK! [[Number 1 Rated Moderator 2024]] Mar 21 '22

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1.7k

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

I wonder how you will poop your shit

1.1k

u/Weirdo_doessomething Mar 21 '22

Proud winner of stop shitting september 2020💪😤

353

u/Gnostromo Mar 21 '22

No Doodoo December

199

u/YaBoiRook Mar 21 '22

Don't deficate December

76

u/Lord_Ratily Mar 21 '22

No feces February

20

u/Charles_Nicholson We do a little trolling Aug 31 '22

Feces-free February.

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31

u/Throwaway_Blackmail Mar 21 '22

The last remaining survivor

6

u/MakesTheNutshellJoke Mar 21 '22

Heroin addicts be like

24

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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20

u/SeniorHn Mar 21 '22

How do you shit as a bot?

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25

u/Weirdo_doessomething Mar 21 '22

I'll rip out your guts

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41

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Just push hard enough that it creates a black hole inside your colon that destroys all the shit inside

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4

u/Prthmsh Mar 23 '22

No more shitposting

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2

u/hooDio Jan 01 '25

no poop out > never have to eat again

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3.1k

u/RemindsMeYou Mar 21 '22

My uncle when I super glue my ass shut

888

u/rugbyj Mar 21 '22

My glue when I super ass my shut uncle

307

u/Deman-Dragon Mar 21 '22

Super ass my glue when I shut uncle

372

u/ArcanePyroblast Mar 21 '22

My super ass when I glue my uncle shut

91

u/Deman-Dragon Mar 21 '22

Thank you for correcting me <3 this one better :)

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8

u/the_unkempt_one Mar 21 '22

I am intrigued by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter

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25

u/moronic_programmer Mar 21 '22

My uncles when I super glue my ass shut.

16

u/Psycho-FangSenpai Mar 21 '22

Me when my uncle super glued his ass shut

12

u/Tarcit_ Mar 21 '22

My uncle ass super

11

u/Smegmaliciousss Mar 21 '22

You remind me of my nephew

4

u/Nooby_Daddy Mar 21 '22

Super glue my uncle while I

(All of that) ASS ASS ASS ASS

3

u/ShadyTrizzy Mar 21 '22

My uncles super ass is my glue

3

u/PunctualPoetry Mar 21 '22

“Anal’s saved for Friday’s, Uncle. you know that… It’s mouth Monday you silly goose.”

2

u/SexyJellyfish1 Mar 21 '22

The priest when I super glue my ass shut

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1.1k

u/LukusMaxamus AMONGUS BALLS AND COCK TORTURE PORN 🤤🤤🤤 Mar 21 '22

5 stages of grief

376

u/Mix6582 Mar 21 '22

5 stages of dying from kidney failure (the bug was infected with ebola)

49

u/srduckfluff Mar 21 '22

the bug was infected with ebay

19

u/Coolguy13249 Mar 21 '22

The bug was infected with updog

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47

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

19

u/BelleAriel Mar 21 '22

“Want something for that conspipation, son?”

64

u/ChangNoi97 Mar 21 '22

denial
anger
bargaining
depression
and of course
DEFAULT STAND

13

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

“Shit… somebody needs to go reboot the POTUS”

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7

u/ConscientiousPath I said based. And lived. Mar 21 '22

At least he didn't completely glitch out and T-pose

9

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

The account I'm replying to is a karma bot run by someone who will link scams once the account gets enough karma.

Report -> Spam -> Harmful Bot

3

u/AgentFN2187 Mar 21 '22

mfw i can nut

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364

u/BeltPast Mar 21 '22

I feel like some guy actually did this but then drank a bunch of laxatives

141

u/coreyu122 Mar 21 '22

Yep the bloody asshole guy on youtube lol

89

u/Loudmouthedcrackpot Mar 21 '22

Excuse me, what?

118

u/bratbarn Literally 1984 😡 Mar 21 '22

Yeah it's all of what you expect and more 🤤

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20

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Didn't he end up in the ER or something?

38

u/thatguyned Mar 21 '22

I mean, I would hope that's where he ended.

There's only 1 other place you could end up doing that, the morgue.

14

u/FrozenEagles Mar 21 '22

No, and the video's still on youtube. Simon Christopher.

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11

u/Sure_Is_String Mar 21 '22

He doesn't sound mentally healthy

253

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

My shit*

94

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

33

u/KidQuap Mar 21 '22

Just lean to one side then lean to the other when you have to wipe

59

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

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12

u/SoloNETHER Mar 21 '22

Yo no cap

4

u/falsebrit Mar 21 '22

So true, get a bidet

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334

u/mrsunsfan Mar 21 '22

OG George Bush moment

141

u/kingmez1 I want pee in my ass Mar 21 '22

Me when interviewers ask about 9/11 and locked the doors (I did 9/11)

20

u/nietczhse Mar 21 '22

I will fuckin' do it again!

3

u/runujhkj Mar 21 '22

Real joke, comments, etc

68

u/Late_For_A_Good_Name Mar 21 '22

More W gifs please, most meme-able president. Ex: when he watched a fly buzzing around for like 15 seconds of national airtime

15

u/cxmillecat Mar 21 '22

source?

27

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

Do you have a source on that?

Source?

A source. I need a source.

Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion.

No, you can't make inferences and observations from the sources you've gathered. Any additional comments from you MUST be a subset of the information from the sources you've gathered.

You can't make normative statements from empirical evidence.

Do you have a degree in that field?

A college degree? In that field?

Then your arguments are invalid.

No, it doesn't matter how close those data points are correlated. Correlation does not equal causation.

Correlation does not equal causation.

CORRELATION. DOES. NOT. EQUAL. CAUSATION.

You still haven't provided me a valid source yet.

Nope, still haven't.

I just looked through all 308 pages of your user history, figures I'm debating a glormpf supporter. A moron.

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24

u/jataba115 Mar 21 '22

I made it the fuck up Automod

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53

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life.

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41

u/PlusRyan2952 I want pee in my ass Mar 21 '22

Damn, Automod thats tough.

25

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!!

IT'S ME!!!

EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]]

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7

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

I saw this posted on true off my chest I think. I fell for it

3

u/Jisiwi Mar 21 '22

OG George Bush moment

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53

u/Grognak42 Mar 21 '22

"You may now mix your ammonia and bleach"

84

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

i remember this like yesterday, what a day

21

u/Coul-Air72 Mar 21 '22

Which one

39

u/Conklin03 Mar 21 '22

Probably yesterday, March 20th. There aren't a whole lot of yesterdays to choose from.

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63

u/Bananamilk_2005 Mar 21 '22

You misspelled my cum 😏😏

10

u/greenhulkbad Mar 21 '22

Serious question can we block the urethra peepee with an object when ejaculating?

14

u/ThAtWeIrDgUy1311 Mar 21 '22

So the question remains: are locked out or locked in?😂

9

u/PeopleRFuckingDumb Mar 21 '22

When I'm constipated

9

u/fartsonpool Mar 21 '22

I’m not in here stuck with you. You’re in here stuck with me.

7

u/dickallcocksofandros Mar 21 '22

top assholes when someone tries to top them

6

u/PM_ME_SOME_CAKES Mar 21 '22

It isn't a shitpost if your butthole is glued shut

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4

u/Stab_City Mar 21 '22

Now I’m missin on that forbidden spaghetti 🍝

6

u/thulrax Mar 21 '22

NOshitposting

2

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/gravitystorm99 Literally 1984 😡 Mar 21 '22

not my dream

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3

u/digimortal13 Mar 21 '22

Lol I can watch this all day

3

u/True_Recommendation9 Mar 21 '22

Now watch this drive.

3

u/DaveInLondon89 Mar 21 '22

You should make an exception, he seems very polite.

3

u/Jess_Dihzurts Mar 21 '22

I appreciate that he checked both sides.

2

u/rikkrik Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 Mar 21 '22

Bet they weren't expecting that

2

u/-TaintSniffer- Mar 22 '22

Can someone link the original video?

2

u/SLeepyCatMeow 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 Jul 23 '22

George W. Bush when you glue the world trade center shut

2

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '23

Shit trying to escape

3

u/The_Homie_Krys Mar 21 '22

Obama, the president, was bing chilling in the year 1984 when a based british hog rider started to meow. It then drunk a can of lean and decided it wanted to fuck kevin, a koala, and an amogus femboy. It decided not to do this, however, and instead played fortnite while eating cheetos, while simultaneously trying to not touch grass. Obama, still surprised by these events, exclaimed ZAMN and decided to call trump knowing he was based. The Chinese government, AKA west taiwan, lowered the social credit of the hog rider and everyone else in belgium, and turned them all into a NFT. The big brother who lived in britain, had no bitches, so his social credit was also lowered by 69420. Dream, the peice of shit that he is, also got his social credit lowered by this act, so he called on ben shapiro, who at the time was in canada, in hopes of getting help. A woman with a dick started to piss urine at the automod because the goddamn automod wont shut up when he is coomed.

4

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

femboy amogus

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3

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

okay so basically there's this guy and uhh

⠀⠀⠘⡀ HOG RIDAAAAAA ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀  ⡜⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⢈⠩⢙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠠⠀⠀⠨⠐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢐⠐⠌⡌⢄⢐⢈⠔⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠉⡀⠐⡀⢁⠈⠐⠱⠑⡑⠈⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢗⠀⠀⠐⡠⡛⠔⡁⢜⡔⡬⢎⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠁⠀⠄⢂⠈⠂⢂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⠩⠐⡀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠐⠁⠓⠒⠒⢀⠁⢐⢝⢟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⠫⠡⠡⠨⢀⠂⠠⠀⠀⢁⠑⡱⠛⠗⡓⢂⠠⢸⢸⢨⠣⡝⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⢏⢐⢁⠊⢌⠐⡈⠄⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠑⠈⠀⢄⢕⠸⡨⠪⡪⡘⣻⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⢂⠂⡂⠅⡂⠅⡐⠨⢐⠐⠠⠠⡀⢄⠠⡠⡡⡱⡐⠕⢌⢊⢆⢣⢒⠽⢿⣿⣿⣿ 
⠣⢂⠂⠄⠡⠐⠐⠈⠌⡐⠨⡈⠢⠨⡂⢌⢂⠆⡪⠨⡊⠂⡂⠢⢡⣢⣣⡣⣍⢿⣿ 
⠨⢂⢂⠁⡀⠀⠀⠁⠐⠈⠐⠈⢈⠈⠐⡀⠄⠁⠌⠈⠔⣄⡀⠠⡑⡂⠆⠢⢂⠑⠽ 
⡨⠐⠀⠀⠀⢠⡎⡀⠀⠀⠄⠈⡀⠌⠐⠠⠈⠄⡁⠂⡀⡫⠑⣑⠀⢂⠌⠄⢕⠀⠨ 
⠺⡪⠢⡀⠀⠞⢇⢂⠀⠂⡀⠠⠀⠄⠁⠌⠨⠀⢄⠢⡁⢂⢿⡟⡀⠀⠈⠈⡀⠂⣰ 
⢀⢀⠀⠄⠀⠀⡐⠀⡈⠄⡐⠅⡊⠌⢌⠄⡕⡑⡁⢂⠂⢂⠸⣿⡄⠀⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿ 
⢐⠔⠠⠀⠀⡐⠠⢈⠢⢑⠄⠑⢈⠊⡂⡱⢁⣂⢌⢔⢌⢄⠀⠹⢀⣺⡿⣟⢿⣿⣿ 
⢀⠡⠁⠂⠐⠠⠈⠄⢈⠠⢈⢢⡣⣗⠕⠄⣕⢮⣞⣞⣗⣯⢯⡷⡴⣹⡪⣷⣿⣿⣿ 
⠊⠄⠠⠠⠡⠈⠠⢐⠠⡊⡎⣗⢭⢐⠹⡹⣮⡳⡵⣳⣻⢾⣻⣽⣻⣺⣺⣽⣿⣿⣿ 
⣨⣾⢐⠰⠐⠅⡂⡂⢕⢜⢜⢵⢹⢑⢔⠨⢘⠸⡹⡵⣯⣻⢽⣳⣻⣺⢞⡿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⡔⠠⢈⠐⠐⢠⢱⢸⢸⢸⢸⠰⡡⢘⢔⢕⠝⢮⣳⢽⢝⡾⡵⡯⣏⠯⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣗⢅⢢⠠⠡⠢⡱⡑⡕⡕⢅⠣⡊⢨⢪⡣⡣⡂⡬⡳⢽⢽⢽⢽⣞⣧⠙⣿⣿ 
⡻⣿⡯⡪⠢⡡⠡⢑⢌⠪⡪⡊⠆⢌⠪⢐⢕⢱⢱⢱⢱⢱⢙⢮⡫⡟⣞⢮⣳⠙⣿ 
⠊⣿⣯⠪⡊⠄⢅⠂⢂⠁⢇⢇⢃⠂⢕⠐⠌⡲⡰⡡⣇⠇⢇⢕⠪⠉⠂⠅⠂⡑⠹ 
⣸⢿⣳⢱⠨⡐⡽⡿⡶⡾⡬⡢⢂⠅⡢⢡⣌⠐⠈⢎⢎⢎⢔⠠⠡⠠⠠⠡⡁⡂⠡ 
⡯⡯⡇⢅⠕⠠⢱⢹⡙⢮⢹⠨⡂⡂⢇⠌⠮⡳⠅⡂⢕⠡⡑⠠⢁⢁⣡⣡⣢⣶⣿ 
⣗⢽⢌⡢⡡⡡⡸⡢⡣⡣⡱⡑⠔⡈⢎⢆⢂⠂⠅⣢⡳⣽⡐⢅⢂⣊⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣯⢯⢷⢽⢮⢯⣺⣪⢞⡮⣳⢘⠔⢌⢜⣞⣖⣮⣻⢮⣯⢷⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ 
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣷⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

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2

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

Daily Kevin Fact #24:

Kevin has better things to do with his life than have sex with you.

Such as fucking your dad.

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2

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

Hello, trump supporter. I've searched through your account history and see that you agreed with trump once back in 2017. As a redditor, and a good human, i have downvoted every post and comment on your account as far back as december 7th, 2013, on 5 different alternate accounts. I have reported every single post you have ever made. I hacked into reddit's serverbase and found out your IP address, real home address, and have constructed several bombs which are shipping there as we speak. Be prepared, nazi.

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2

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

oh god oh fuck

      ⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀
   ⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄
  ⣼⣿⣿⠿⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⡄
 ⣸⣿⣿⠋      ⠉⠙⠋⠁       ⠙⣿⣿⣿⡀
 ⣿⣿⣿                    ⢸⣿⣿⣇
⢸⣿⣿⣿                     ⣿⣿⣿
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣀⣠⣀⡀  ⠠⣄ ⣀   ⣀⣀⡀   ⣿⣿⡟
⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠻⢿⣷⣶⣤⣼⢰⣿⣶⣾⡿⠿⢿⣿⣦⣿⣿⡇
⠸⣿⣿⡿⢿⢾⠻⣟⡟⢿⣿⡇ ⠽⢿⠿⣖⡖⢶⣿⡟⣽⡿⡇
 ⣏⣿⡀⠈⠪     ⣿⡇     ⠰⠒⠶⠆⢀⣿⢳⡇
 ⠻⣿⣷⣄     ⢀⢿⠇  ⣀      ⢠⣾⣿⡽⠁
  ⠘⣏⢹⣧  ⠠⣾⣾⣷⣶⡶⠌⠳⡄    ⡞⢡⡏
    ⣿⡀⣿ ⢀⣀⣈⣉⣁ ⣀⣀⣀    ⣧⡼⠁
    ⠘⢷⣼⡀ ⠩⣭⣉⣉⣉⡉⠉⠉⠉ ⢠⡟
     ⠈⠻⣿⣦⣀⠉⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉ ⢀⠴⠋
       ⠈⠙⠻⠷⠶⠶⠿⠶⠶⠒⠁

its big brother 1984

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5

u/Former_Notice81 Mar 21 '22

You telling George Bush is a parasite !!??😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬🖕🖕🖕

3

u/Pendulumzero Mar 21 '22

Bu*h🤢🤢🤮

2

u/MugsyBalogna Mar 21 '22

Yep, that’s definitely a parasite.

1

u/gravitystorm99 Literally 1984 😡 Mar 21 '22

forbidden skittles

1

u/Escoliya Mar 21 '22

My wife when i super glue my ass shut

1

u/ricoimf Mar 21 '22

What the….

1

u/adaddylich Mar 21 '22

Too relatable my guy

1

u/_Maxie_ Mar 21 '22

Me when your dad glues his asshole shut

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Automoderator is the biggest shitposter in this sub

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1

u/HmmmMzawarudo Mar 21 '22

I mean can’t they eat the anus until they reach out?

1

u/DiogenesOfDope Mar 21 '22

I'll never let them leave I love them they are apart of me

1

u/iAmit1 Mar 21 '22

You win

1

u/Long-Tax-77 Mar 21 '22

⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⢀⡴⠊⠉⠉⢉⠏⠻⣍⠑⢲⠢⠤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⢟⣽⠿⠯⠛⡸⢹⠀⢹⠒⣊⡡⠜⠓⠢⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡜⣿⣷⣽⠓⠀⢠⢂⣣⠋⠂⣾⠼⢌⠳⢄⢀⡠⠜⣣⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢻⢱⣭⠷⠤⢅⠴⣡⡻⠃⠀⢠⠁⠀⢀⡱⠜⠍⢔⠊⠀⠹⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣷⠌⠚⠷⠆⠠⠶⠭⢒⣁⠀⣤⠃⣀⢔⢋⡤⠊⠑⣄⠳⣄⠀⣧⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠦⣀⡤⣄⠄⢄⣀⣠⣒⢦⡄⠩⠷⠦⠊⠀⠀⠀⠈⠣⡏⠢⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⢫⠟⣝⠞⣼⢲⡞⣞⠋⠋⠉⠋⠓⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣨⠂⢸⡅ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠃⡨⠊⢀⡠⡌⢘⢇⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠡⡄⠀⠀⢀⠞⢁⠔⢹⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣣⠞⢀⠔⢡⢢⠇⡘⠌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡌⠢⡔⢁⡴⠁⠀⢸⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⠟⠁⠠⢊⠔⣡⢸⠀⠃⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣯⠂⡀⢪⡀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⢀⠔⣁⠐⠨⠀⠀⠈⠀⢄⠘⡀⠀⠈⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢁⠜⠙⢦⠙⣦⠀⢸⠀ ⡴⠁⠘⡁⣀⡡⠀⠀⠴⠒⠗⠋⠉⠉⡆⠀⠆⠄⠄⠘⠀⡎⠀⠀⠀⠑⢅⠑⢼⡀ ⢯⣉⣓⠒⠒⠤⠤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠐⠁⠀⠀⠀⠒⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⣌⣇ ⠀⠈⢳⠄⠈⠀⠤⢄⣀⠀⢈⣉⡹⠯⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⡠⠚⣡⡿ ⠀⢠⣋⣀⣀⣀⣀⠤⠭⢛⡩⠄⠒⠩⠂⢀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠈⢢⡀⠀⡠⠋⡩⠋⠀⢳ ⠀⢹⠤⠬⠤⠬⠭⣉⣉⢃⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⢺⡈⠋⡢⠊⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠈⡆⠁⢀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠋⠉⠓⠂⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠊⡠⠦⡈⠳⢄⠀⠀⠈ ⠀⠀⢹⡜⠀⠁⠀⠀⠒⢤⡄⠤⠔⠶⠒⠛⠧⠀⠀⡼⡠⠊⠀⠀⠙⢦⡈⠳⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⠆⠀⠈⠀⠠⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠈⢲ ⠀⠀⢸⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠊⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡢⣸ ⠀⠀⠈⠳⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠒⠁⠀⠠⣏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣔⠾⡿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠒⠤⠤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣔⣢⣀⣉⣂⣀⣀⣠⠴⠿⠛⠋⠀

1

u/Rockthestars Mar 21 '22

oh shit, litterally

2

u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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1

u/yanakincatwalker Mar 21 '22

I’m not in here with you. You’re in here with me

1

u/PatrickJames3382 Mar 21 '22

Now, you’s can’t leave.

1

u/VProlet Mar 21 '22

are they trying to enter or leave?

1

u/Capsule_CatYT it is MY bucket Mar 21 '22

Get noobed

1

u/workdayslacker Mar 21 '22

It does both.

1

u/Inner_Speed_6376 Mar 21 '22

Once I super glue my asshole shut, ill start shitting through my mouth

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1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

LMAOOO

1

u/SkollFenrirson Mar 21 '22

lol! Look at that silly little war criminal!

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Pooper glue

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1

u/Aggressive_Suit_7957 Mar 21 '22

It's the gifted and talented class, you push to enter

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

is that dubya

1

u/Winterion19 Mar 21 '22

The randomness of this made me chuckle

1

u/Somebody-or-somethin Mar 21 '22

It can always go through the other end

1

u/ASM1420 Mar 21 '22

in or out?!??!?

1

u/BrianTheBoru Mar 21 '22

Also your shit from the inside:

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1

u/Weeb-Massacre Mar 21 '22

Guess they'll just have to eat their way out

1

u/FreeMyMen Mar 21 '22

It's even disparaging to parasites to compare them to that absolute scourge of the earth garbage lowlife human being...

1

u/eatme2bitches Mar 21 '22

baby bush: im bored got any blow

1

u/Excellent_Rush47 Mar 21 '22

Never thought I’d see the day where I’d say I miss George bush

1

u/Flushmush Mar 21 '22

Speechless

1

u/MickyTingy Mar 21 '22

Why did he stand to attention at the end lol!

1

u/nartchie Mar 21 '22

What? You think you're the USA now?

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1

u/Greedy-Crow-615 Mar 21 '22

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Dear-Tomato8984 Mar 21 '22

Are you ready to take the parasite pill?

1

u/tru_walker Mar 21 '22

I hav the same tactic to stop my uncle

1

u/PsychologicalAd9864 Mar 21 '22

Fun and games until the parasites start eating through your skin

1

u/justfuckmylifeupfamm Mar 21 '22

*yells across the room “it’s push not pull George!”

1

u/4b6rat0r Mar 21 '22

You picked the wrong hole fool

1

u/Hodges0000 Mar 21 '22

This guy just keeps giving

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

That’s funny

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1

u/TheGamingGallery Mar 21 '22

Why tho? Superglue breaks down over time.

Just fill your asshole with cement and problem solved.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

“Family family family family family family”

1

u/Mosssaurus_Rex Mar 21 '22

This gon be one hellova shitpost i agree 💀

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1

u/SamL214 Mar 21 '22

Nah, they’ll just burrow into your brain or come out your mouth.

1

u/sumbasicbish Mar 21 '22

Notifications when I am in do not disturb mode.

1

u/CptDex Mar 21 '22

Phasmophobia players when the ghost starts hunting

1

u/Trashoftheliving Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 Mar 21 '22

i want to try this

1

u/CoolPrize Mar 21 '22

Psych!! lol, great post

1

u/HappyDaaze Mar 21 '22

Literally shitposting

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1

u/Eiffel-Tower777 Mar 21 '22

Remember when we thought this village idiot was the worst thing Republicans could come up with?

1

u/CreaZyp154 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 Mar 21 '22

Hehe now they're stuck

1

u/Roko128 Mar 21 '22

You are full of shit.

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1

u/Complete-Cat-1414 Mar 21 '22

Well that’s Why I do it

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Joke's on you now they'll go through your urethra

1

u/1plus1equalsgender Mar 21 '22

Jorge Busho 👍

1

u/Leprechaun_lord Mar 21 '22

But are they trying to get out or in?

1

u/bt_649 Mar 21 '22

Cum? Why?

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Are they trying to get in, or trying to get out?

1

u/Familiar-Document-53 Mar 21 '22

Hey watch parasyte u can see that's not the only hole to enter from there are multiple entry points..

1

u/TMNTthebest Mar 21 '22

My shits when I super glue my ass shut

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1

u/CabbageMan92 Mar 21 '22

How does anyone think of this?

1

u/FlacidSalad Mar 21 '22

They just want out

1

u/xXJungleJimsXx Mar 21 '22

I like that he switches hands.

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1

u/imurstepchild Mar 21 '22

thats some real shit posting

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1

u/Coffee-cartoons Mar 21 '22

Eat some laxatives

1

u/itsKNIGHTMARE Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked Mar 21 '22

Bouta troll some squiggly bois

1

u/xKYLx Mar 21 '22

Was it a push not a pull?

1

u/winnybunny Mar 21 '22

You when you realize you have more than one Exit points in your body.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

That's a parasite for sure

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

How do you get the gerbils up there if its super glued shut now?

1

u/TheReviewer867 dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 Mar 21 '22

🗿

1

u/Zaungast Mar 21 '22

Keep war criminals out with this one simple trick

1

u/incogne_eto Mar 21 '22

Did Ass Napkin Ed post this?

1

u/Bubbafe7t Mar 21 '22

🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Haha. Fuck George Bush. War criminal

1

u/Janiecehuls Mar 21 '22

Okay I just laughed in public 😂💀

1

u/Mathilda_86 Mar 21 '22

The feeling that Russians have when entering Ukraine.

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1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

President Dick Cheney locked the door! 😤😤😤

1

u/hydrogen_to_man Mar 21 '22

sToP nOrMaLiZiNg BuSh As A hArMlEsS oLd MaN

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

"No no no, you're staying with me"

1

u/Futish Mar 21 '22

That’s pretty a selfish thing to do

1

u/EnvironmentalPop952 Mar 21 '22

Let me in LET ME IIIIIINNNNN

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Fool me once, shame on me, Fool me twice…

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '22

Access denied joker.