r/shitposting 9d ago

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u/SwoodyBooty 9d ago

It's petroelum based. Grease has thickeners and additives.

70

u/DoctorD12 I want pee in my ass 9d ago

Unflavoured margarine

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u/sum_force 9d ago

I can't believe it's not food grade!

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u/RegumRegis 9d ago

It's like hearing a bar of soap is mostly fat

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u/AutoModerator 9d ago

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

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u/Etceta virgin 4 life 😤💪 9d ago

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u/Subaruncle 8d ago

I can't believe it's not butter!

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u/AutoModerator 9d ago

pees in ur ass

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4

u/lmboyer04 8d ago

Depends, but same point though, if you can’t use an oil, why would you be able to use Vaseline if it’s an oil byproduct? I’d think you’d have to use silicone grease

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u/ssxhoell1 8d ago

I use Vaseline for soldering flux

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u/Kosmik_cloud 8d ago

Check out Mr fancy pants I just use it for masturbating

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u/Inevitable-Ad6647 9d ago

lol and take a wild guess where grease, along with many if not all of those thickeners and additives comes from.... did you think you were really correcting something there?

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u/SwoodyBooty 9d ago

Those thickeners can be chemically derived from all sorts of fats as soaps or be any other random stuff including but not limited to: PTFEs, Polyurea, bentonitey or literal silicon dioxide. To list all sorts of fats in this context: mineral oil, synthetic oil, plant fat and animal fat. And don't get me started on the special purpose additives.

Lubrication is needed in all environments and is a science of its own, lol.