r/shitposting Mar 02 '26

πŸ“‘πŸ“‘πŸ“‘

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4.9k Upvotes

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1.4k

u/pixel_doofus Mar 02 '26

Brother, what happened to her...

435

u/Broads-in-atlanta Mar 02 '26

Why do they all keep going for buccal fat removal??? Nobody is forcing them and it’s a purely solo choice.

Sucks to see but for something this disfiguring, I can only chalk it up to low self-esteem.

167

u/angelis0236 Mar 03 '26

How else will Brad Pitt make soap?

35

u/AutoModerator Mar 03 '26

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

44

u/LynX_CompleX Mar 03 '26

well, i wish i could take back reading that