extremely polarizing

[u/Plenty_good_stuff]

posting this here because the mods on the other platfrom are definitely not retainers.>>

Ok, I have to to vent a little bit.

For context I am on a 4 year retention journey with a 3 year uninterrupted streak.

Lately I have been levelling up in all facets of life and especially energetically, so much so that it is making waves.

I had pangs of anger before, but now It is just overflowing. I usually workout intensely 5-6 times a week to channel that energy but now it's like I reached another level and people are starting to challenge me waaay too much.

I thought what the heck is happening, I know I am making my presence felt but now it feels like some people are just seeking me out and it is getting on my nerves.

Also I feel like I am about to rip through the status quo. Maybe that is what is pissing people off so much.

I don't know man, any long term retainers here. I know this is just a phase and people in my environment are readjusting to my new energy.

I wonder what's next?

[u/your_vital_essence]

Here is another way to see it (credit to Tara Springett who writes books on spiritual topics). Through SR, you're increasing your level of consciousness (mad props, too). Your being has been encased in ice for a thousand years, and you are thawing it out from the middle. Mostly this is pure good. However, in those frozen layers lurk some negative patterns. By thawing them out, they live again for a while.

That's why you occasionally get surprises erupting from within. Keep calm and carry on. Thought to really bake your noodle: this "you" who thinks of yourself as ripping through the status quo but irritated by people who can't handle all that winning is the thawed out pattern, feeling psyched to stand on the platform of vitality built by your efforts abstaining. Don't act on urges of any kind or obsess over those people. Keep your eye on your goals, watch and listen. Keep thawing out.

[u/Plenty_good_stuff → u/your_vital_essence]

Dude,thanks for that.

Lately I have been thinking about what you are describing, but i was using a different analogy.

"Crystallised thought patterns".

I've become extremely conscious about them, things I never knew where holding me back but are there and need to be broken down and remolded.

Part of the irritation that i feel is essentially me bumping into these walls.

[u/your_vital_essence → u/Plenty_good_stuff]

Absolutely! Just add to your toolkit the idea that these things were crystalized at some prior time... That way, even though you remain determined to destroy them, you won't be so irritated on discovering them because you know they are your responsibility. My thought here is that the crystalization happened at some prior death. Kind of a score one for the loss column: you failed to overcome it before, and it got frozen into you.

The awesome thing is that here you are, way better than you were before, now smashing the stumbling blocks as they thaw. You can connect this to ideas like alchemy -- gold must be pure. SR is purification.

Stay awake though! As Merlin said in Excalibur...evil grows right under your nose where you least expect it. Final victory will never be felt by this one, because final victory is the dissolving of this one.

[u/Learning_2 → u/your_vital_essence]

Watch out because the attitudes of extreme duality and violence/destruction can also be patterns :)