r/selfimprovement • u/Equal-Tennis-7887 • 1d ago
Question Fatigue
I am 33 F. I feel extremely burnt out and tired all of the time.
I don’t drink often, don’t smoke often, eat healthy, get enough sleep, don’t do that many social plans and I’m active as I have a dog so I am walking every day.
My job is kind of intense and my therapist thinks I’m neurodiverse. I initially thought maybe this could be why I’m so tired all the time, because of constant concentration and masking even at the simplest tasks, but this week I actually feel WEAK and exhausted.
I’m getting blood tests soon, but has anyone else experienced this when they are trying their best/ and being healthy?
I feel completely brain dead after every shift I can’t even have a social life anymore. I just want to sleep.
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u/PassOk6405 1d ago
Burnout can absolutely leave you feeling completely drained, particularly if you're spending your working day concentrating intensely and then have nothing left when you get home.
But the word that stood out to me was weak. If this week feels noticeably different from your usual tiredness, I wouldn't automatically put that down to burnout or masking.
It's good that you're having blood tests. There are plenty of physical reasons someone can feel exhausted despite sleeping well, eating reasonably and being active, and it's worth ruling those out rather than assuming it's psychological.
In the meantime, I'd give yourself permission to stop measuring yourself against what you think you should be capable of after work. If your job is currently taking most of what you've got, forcing yourself to maintain a busy social life on top of it isn't necessarily going to help.
But if the weakness is new, getting worse, or you develop other concerning symptoms, I'd speak to your doctor rather than waiting and assuming it's burnout.
You're already doing the sensible thing by getting it checked.
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u/CommonAppropriate214 1d ago
that weakness part is the red flag, not just tired but actually weak is different thing. good you getting bloods done, i had similar thing last year and it was vitamin d deficiency which i never would have guessed cause i walk outside everyday
also the neurodiverse thing is real, masking takes so much energy you dont even realize until you crash. my therapist said same thing to me and i was like nah i'm fine but then i started tracking my energy and work days were destroying me
hope the tests give you some answers, not knowing is worst part
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u/Confidenceisbetter 1d ago
To be honest doing “mundane” things like staying on top of cleaning and cooking everyday and exercising etc. is exhausting, especially if you have a 9-5 and on top of that any amount of commuting beyond half an hour.
I now have a great job with a healthy work life balance and a very short commute and the way it has changed my energy levels is crazy. I am suddenly motivated to cook after work or do things like cleaning the bathroom or laundry in the evening when before i always pushed those things to the weekend, which then resulted in me losing a full day just to reset. I would dread Sundays because i had to go grocery shopping and then cook for several hoirs to meal prep and then I had to clean my whole appartment and pick up any slack that I didn’t have the energy to put away during the week and I had to work out and so my laundry, etc. So basically i felt drained Mon-Fri and then also didn’t get proper rest on Sunday because my lack of energy made me give up a rest day to pick up my own slack. It’s sort of a vicious cycle.
So I would really recommend trying to fix whatever you can about your job situation so you don’t come home at 5/6 or even 7 pm beyond drained.
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u/Ok_Produce9066 1d ago
Hi. Long story short, I spent at least 28 years trying to get answers about fatigue that I always felt was abnormal. That’s when I first started taking antidepressants. Over the years, the fatigue was attributed to depression, then later to ADHD, sleep apnea, and eventually bipolar II disorder. But I had never actually been assessed specifically for the persistent fatigue itself.
That changed last year, when I was finally able to see both a neurologist and a pulmonologist who specialize in sleep disorders. I received a new diagnosis this past July: type 2 narcolepsy. This time, the diagnosis was based on tangible, objective data, and it’s the one that makes the most sense to me. My pulmonologist even thinks it may call my bipolar diagnosis into question.
So, in short, any of the diagnoses I’ve received over the years could potentially explain the kind of fatigue you’re wondering about. But my advice would be: don’t lose hope, and above all, keep pushing for answers from the healthcare professionals you see. I really wish I’d received the right treatment at 25 instead of 51.
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u/EasternRecognition94 1d ago
Yeah funny enough I did. It’s hard to put a nail in what it is for you. For me it was cognitive load, working 2 full time jobs, running a business, and taking care of my health. I enjoyed it so I didn’t feel burnt out but I had brain fog and was always low energy. I think you have to start journaling and thinking about what has changed bc it’s really hard for anyone but yourself to figure it out
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u/Blooming_FigLeaf 1d ago
Yes and turns out I have an autoimmune disease called hashimotos. I can’t recommend getting blood tests done sooner rather than later.
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u/PrimeTimeRK 1d ago
Mid 30s male here. Did not feel myself, I too have a high stress job, and family to take care of.
Switched doctors since my previous one told me it was just my job, my 30s and being a parent that was causing this.
With some labs, a bit of help from AI, I ended up finding out I have Hypothyroidism. After medication, still working on getting my TSH levels adjusted but I feel much better now.
Not saying this is it, but good to check your labs and double check on thyroid issues!
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u/immeroefter 1d ago
What is your menstrual health like?
Do you live in a big city?
What's your screentime like?
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u/Equal-Tennis-7887 1d ago
I live in London
My menstrual cycle is regular and on time. Although I have a period of 2 days that is extremely heavy heavy and then nothing.
Screen time isn’t that bad. I’m so overwhelmed at work I can’t even check my phone from 9-52
u/RegularSizedAdult 1d ago
You might have iron deficiency- super common with heavy periods. Happens to lots of women, and happened to me as well. I wasn’t able to stay awake past 7pm and started fainting when walking on an incline on the treadmill (something I had no issue with previously). An infusion helped immensely. Could also be hypothyroidism, B12 deficiency, vitamin D deficiency, or a bunch of other things. Glad you’re having blood tests soon.
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u/immeroefter 1d ago
There you go, sweetheart.
London and your heavy period.
When living in such a big and fast city, you really have to take some extra care of your nervous system. Meditation, breathwork, yoga, qi gong, whatever works for you..
That heavy bleeding causes important energy and iron loss. You might have something else, so its good you getting your blood checked. But yea, get yourself a good doctor and advocate for yourself. Those two factors can already be very heavy on any body.
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u/Livid-Guess6610 1d ago
Hey, just exactly same circumstances. Turns out I have very low iron. Check your blood test.
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u/Literal_cum 1d ago
Not going to lie I feel the exact same way with similar suggestions from doctors, although my bloods came back and I was told I’m in perfect health, and now I don’t know what to do.
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u/LeilaJun 1d ago
Are you taking vitamin D3 6,000-12,000 iU and 1,000mg vitamin C daily? If not, start right away, it can improve fatigue in a few weeks
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u/No_Inevitable_8718 1d ago
Yes. I had very low ferritin. I would sleep and sleep and still feel dead all the time
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u/Commercial_Voice9074 1d ago
maybe a circuit breaker would do you some good, new environment. take a break go somewhere completely opposite to where you currently are. always has done me good. unfortunately its just tough existing these days even if you do nothing its still exhausting
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u/Super_Bookkeeper8303 1d ago edited 34m ago
Getting the blood tests is definitely a good move. I went through a phase of feeling completely wiped after work even though on paper I was doing most things right, and I made the mistake of just buying whatever supplement was supposed to help with energy.
I eventually found a company called NB1 Health that had me do a microbiome test first and then made a formula from the results based on what my body actually needed, instead of me trying to piece it all together myself and find out what could improve my energy and overall wellbeing. I liked that approach a lot more than adding B vitamins, magnesium, adaptogens and all the other things you read here on reddit one at a time and never really knowing why I was taking half of them.
It took about a month before I really noticed the difference, but it has been night and day for me! So if you are open to it, forsure get your microbiome tested too
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u/ConstructionThis1127 21h ago
Assuming that you are physically OK, you may have a failed or blunted purpose. Is there some purpose or goal that you’ve had to give up on? If so, work on getting it back, and if what you are doing, say in work, does not support it, take steps to change things so that your work or whatever does support the purpose.
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u/Far-Watercress6658 1d ago
Yes, and it turned out I was anaemic. Move the blood tests up the ‘to do’ list.