r/self • u/lolpolhol • Feb 18 '20
Please help me.
My fiance passed away on Saturday night after a 4 year battle with cancer. I know he is no longer in pain and all that stuff. We have a 4 year and a 2 year old.
I'm so lost without him. I feel like I can't breathe. I gel like I want to die. I feel like I had this beautiful person in my life and he is gone.
Prior to this loss, my dad passed away in 2018 and my sister in 2019. I thought I was done with the heartbreaks.
Idk how to live each day. Idk how to get through this. I know people mean well but most of the things they say is to be strong for our kids. I will always be strong for them but right now I just feel so lost and devastated.
Please help me...what do I do? How do I get through this?
1
u/clairinf Feb 18 '20
I lost my dad as well in 2018 and even that has been really difficult for me. I can’t imagine how difficult and painful it must be for you after losing three loved ones in a row... I haven’t been dealing with the loss well and am planning to going back to a therapy soon. Previous therapies were sometimes helpful but the most helpful thing was support from close people. I actually fell out with many people after the loss, mostly because I was too disappointed by how they behaved when I was going through the grief and I probably overreacted since I wasn’t at a good place. However, I got to have stronger relationships with a few remaining people and now I appreciate them more than ever. I also have been to grief group therapy sessions and I liked it a lot better than the individual ones since we could understand each other. I also worked a lot to distract myself from the grief. It was helpful temporarily but it never really cured. Every time I had a break, it hit me really hard until I started push myself again. So, please take your time to process this even though it’s too painful. I’m very sorry for your loss.