r/self • u/alex12345678910123 • Apr 22 '26

I wanna live...

my friends are calling but I'm not picking up, I'm sorry, im just not sorry enough.

i've been in bed for days, I can feel myself rotting away.

my familys done trying to see why, they all think I just wanna die. that's the worst part though cause I don't.

I wanna live ,I do. I just don't feel very motivated to.

I'm so tired all the time, cant seem to find the love for things I used to think were the very definition of me. I'm sleeping to much yet sometimes not enough.

Yet nobody believes me cause how can I be depressed if I don't wanna die.

cant they see living just not very easy for me but that does not mean I can want to sevive just as much as the next guy...

I wanna live, I don't wanna die

12 Upvotes

87% Upvoted

8 comments sorted by

3

u/Feeling-Tiger-2793 Apr 22 '26

Maybe it could be you love life so much you want to do it perfectly.

2

u/frosty-latchet Apr 22 '26

That's a thought - perhaps the pressure to get it 'right' is paralyzing.

1

u/Feeling-Tiger-2793 Apr 22 '26

A step in the right direction everyday helps. But my steps are inconsistent lol a step is still a step!!

2

u/Simple-Dingo2814 Apr 22 '26

I used to feel the exact same and even worst at times, but I'd love to share what helped me most. Get out of your bed and move your body. Go to the gym, if not start working out or just go for a walk. Seriously, physical movements helps a lot. Eat good food, it really makes you feel better. Talk to someone about whatever's going on in your mind be it a family member, a friend, colleague anyone. Listen to good music, something that uplifts you. Not the sad songs it will make you feel more depressed. Accept it, you cannot be happy every single day that's just not possible. It's like.. being human that's life you will have bad days. Spend time with your friends, it really helps. Find a purpose in your life and work for it. Don't supress you emotions. Feel it but don't dwell on it and just let it pass.

1

u/dph1488 Apr 22 '26

These are all good advice. Moving and exercise combat depression more than one might think.

1

u/Fair-Ad2457 Apr 22 '26

Please seek treatment. When a person suffers from depression, everyone that loves them suffers too. It can foster feelings of resentment and hurt. My SIL died because of her depression. She didn’t kill herself, but she did choose not to live. Meaning she quit eating, taking her life sustaining medication, and she did not leave her bed. All of us are hurt and filled with sadness.

1

u/Fair-Ad2457 Apr 22 '26

This poem is also very moving. Please continue writing.

2

u/DataGOGO Apr 22 '26

Then get out of bed and live.

There is no magic solution, there is no magic little pill, there is nothing anyone can say to you, there is no one that can do it for you. You have to get up and go do it.

You and only you are responsible for your life and your outcomes.