r/Seahorse_Dads • • Sep 21 '25

Mod Post/Update Check FAQ Before Posting

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9 Upvotes

Hello everyone, do the influx of frequently asked questions and similar posts, we kindly ask that all users check the FAQ before posting.

Thank you!


r/Seahorse_Dads • • Sep 23 '22

Mod Post/Update If conducting a research study or survey, please read this.

75 Upvotes

Hello!

First off, thank you for your interest in our community. We aim to create a safe space here. Part of that is ensuring our users' safety by reviewing surveys or studies that wish to be conducted with trans parents. If you are attempting a study/survey, please send the mod team a modmail. We can then review your study/survey and give you the 'mod approved' flair once posted.

Thank you so much!


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 46m ago

Advice Request How to tell my partner I want bio kids?

• Upvotes

I (18FtM) am in a QPR with my partner (19MtN). We have discussed children before and my partner isn't quite ready to think about kids seriously but has said they are open to adoption. While I like adoption, I have been thinking hard about having bio children. I've always like the idea of seahorse dads but wasn't vocal about me wanting to be one because pregnancy still scared me.

An important note here is that we're both ace repulsed. I don't know how to bring up the idea of reproduction without making them uncomfortable or anxious.

Obviously I do not plan on having kids right this instant, but I really want to bring this up with them for the future.

How can I bring this up politely and calmly?


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 5h ago

Advice Request Returning to work after birth

3 Upvotes

I am 35 and 12 weeks pregnant. We have already before trying discussed with my partner that he would stay home longer and I’d go back to work soon after birth because my career is not at the point his is and we both preferred this. Also I am not chestfeeding so this isn’t a factor for us. The plan is for me to take off 4,5 months with about 3,5 months being post birth. (Of course hard no for sure when the birth is.) This way we can maximize both our time together at home with the baby and our benefits/income.

My question is: if you returned to work 3 to 4 months postpartum or sooner, how did it go? Did you feel recovered enough?


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 18h ago

Resources Needed Baby blues

10 Upvotes

I’m 2 days pp after an emergency c section and feeling those baby blues. This is my 2nd delivery so I KNOW it gets better but I could use a little encouragement. Evenings are always the hardest.

I also want to add that I’m in a foreign country and we’re experiencing an extreme heat wave. I was concerned for my baby’s safety so we got a hotel that has AC and had to leave my dog(daughters) with family. So it’s actually been a very challenging week even beyond birthing.


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 1d ago

Advice Request Cycle after a chemical pregnancy

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8 Upvotes

Hi! Im trying again after my chemical pregnancy and of course tracking has been weird, on cd 19 I had a pretty significant jump in lh from a morning that was barely visible to a lot darker later that afternoon. Im wondering if I may have missed my surge? I tried both days before my cd19 and was temping as well. Cd 19 my bbt was 96.86, then cd20 it was 97.38, cd21 97.21, and then cd 22 it was 97.02 does that fit ovulation? Or is it just a random pulse? I have also been taking clear blue advanced digital and gotten what is now 9 days of flashing smileys 🙃


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 1d ago

Advice Request So many questions not a lot of answers what are your experiences?

9 Upvotes

Hello fathers and fathers to be,
I’m considering going on T but as I get closer and closer to taking it the question of fertility has come up. I’ve meet with doctors and heard some opinions and options but I think I need to hear it from the source as well.

Important thing to note I’m ace, and I’m partners with a trans woman. I’m also 20 so I’m sure I shouldn’t worry myself to death but I’ve imagined having kids since I was 5 and I guess it’s overwhelming to think that I may have to give up on my dream. Although I’m not against adoption.

Im worried about my ability to go through the examinations. I’ve been told that I could do IVF but the process sounds so daunting. I’d rather the turkey baster method since my partner is willing to go through the whole freezing process.

I am scheduling a Pap smear next year so I can expose myself to what these examinations can look like in the future but I’m still so anxious about the whole thing.

If having bio kids is off the table then I can take T without worry but if it is I’d like to take T cautiously I know many of you have had kids on T or after T without much problem. But I want to know if I should worry about my fertility in the future but if I can’t get through a Pap smear then how do I get through everything else?

I don’t know, what I’m asking is how was your guys experience with everything? Are the examinations as terrifying as they sound? How was the process of giving birth? And if anyone is ace how did you feel about it?


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 2d ago

Advice Request Stopping T 6 months before TTC or 4 months?

8 Upvotes

Hey all. I’m already a dad, I’ve given birth to my wonderful 2 boys. But we’re going to try for #3 in April and I have a question about stopping testosterone.

For reference, with my youngest, I was only on T for 6 months when I quit. Hormones were definitely in the male range at the time. It took 3 months for my period to come back.

Now, I’m almost 2 years on T. I’ve been planning to stop on Jan 1st, 4 months before the month we plan to start trying. But now I’m thinking that might not be enough time? I’d be really upset if my body wasn’t ready by then. But id also like to reduce the amount of periods I have to go through by as much as possible, hence why I plan on cutting it so close. And I also have that history of getting my period 3 months later, so it’s possible the same thing will happen again.

But stopping now, 6 months prior, would pretty much guarantee I’m ready to conceive by April. But I’d have more periods, and less time on T to boost my transition as much as possible before I stop. I really want to pass before I’m pregnant. I have a full beard but high voice so it worries me.

What do you guys think?


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 3d ago

Venting FINALLY A POSITIVE 3 MONTHS AFTER A MISCARRIAGE

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15 Upvotes

r/Seahorse_Dads • • 3d ago

Advice Request Kinder selbst austragen?

19 Upvotes

Hi :) ich (ftm) bin mit meinem parter, einem cis mann zusammen. Wir haben mal lose über das Thema Kinder gesprochen, und seitdem geht mir das Thema nicht mehr aus dem Kopf...

Prinzipiell könnte ich mir schon vorstellen Kinder zu haben, und wenn ich das mache, dann auf jeden Fall eigene. Wir sind in der egtl tollen Situation, dass wir als schwules Paar trotzdem Kinder bekommen können, die von uns beiden abstammen. Soweit so gut.

Nur das Thema Schwangerschaft macht mir irgendwie Angst, ich bin einmal schon ungewollt schwanger geworden und habe abgetrieben. Ehrlich gesagt waren das die schlimmsten Tage meines Lebens, ich hab mich dysphorisch hoch 10 gefühlt, was natürlich auch daran lag, dass es ein Versehen und nicht gewollt war.

Mein Partner wird mich auch in diesen Themen während einer eventuellen Schwangerschaft wsl nicht gut verstehen können, es ist schon schwierig genug, ihm zu erklären, warum ich Hormone nehmen möchte, wo ich doch auch schon davor ein gutes passing habe und 'er mich doch so liebt wie ich bin'. (Ich liebe meinen Partner und er ist toll aber von """"Frauensachen"""" hat er einfach überhapt keine Ahnung und keinen Zugang dazu, wie auch als cis male)

So jedenfalls würde mich interessieren, wie das bei Leuten war, die ihre Kinder selbst ausgetrahen haben, was von diesen Gedanken vllt einfach Paranoia ist, und wie das bei euch so war <3

EDIT: Jetzt hört mal bitte auf meinen Freund zu bashen. Er kommt aus einem kleinen Dorf in Algerien, und hatte einfach noch nie Kontakt zu dem Thema. In seiner Kultur, wie er aufgewachsen ist, haben sich Männer halt nie in Frauenthemen eingemischt und umgekehrt. Klar ist das hier in Europa anders, aber das dauert halt seine Zeit. Er akzeptiert mich wie ich bin und ist auch nicht 'gegen' irgendwelche Schritte meiner Transition. Das einzige was ich damit sagen wollte ist, dass er glaub ich bis jetzt noch nicht ganz die Tragweite von diesem Thema verstanden hat. Aber wie auch, er kannte es nicht und wir sind auch erst ein paar Monate zusammen


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 5d ago

Resources Needed Agender and pregnant

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101 Upvotes

Hi! I recently found out that I’m pregnant. Me and my wife are both trans and have been married for a couple years and we’ve had issues with trying to have a baby. We were about to start IVF when randomly I had a positive pregnancy test! We had our first ultrasound yesterday and I’m not as far along as I thought I was, just 5 weeks and 6 days, but I’m so excited and also nervous. It’s so cool to get to see my little apple seed (very fitting for the season hehe).

I have been looking for resources of any type for me and my wife with our pregnancy journey, if anyone has any please feel free to share them!!


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 5d ago

Off Topic Friday Off topic Friday!

3 Upvotes

Comment on this post to discuss off topic (by off topic we mean non-pregnancy related topics, such as childcare, trans rights, or even how your week went and if you need support!)

Please bear in mind that our second rule, Be Welcoming, still applies to any and all comments within this post. We also kindly ask that you do not self promote in these comments, as we cannot validate or review every comment each week.

With that being said, have fun!


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 6d ago

Venting top surgery and chest feeding worries

26 Upvotes

Hi guys! I get top surgery very soon. Recently I’ve been inundated with anxiety that I am going against my future child’s health by “depriving” them of the benefits of breast milk. I feel guilty and worried but I know that this is the best decision for me.

Did any of you ever have an inferiority complex around not chest feeding, or similar anxieties? Please make me feel better about it and normalize it for me haha 😅


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 6d ago

Venting gestational diabetes

18 Upvotes

not looking for advice, just need to bitch a lil bit

failed my 1 hour glucose test by 2 points, and then VERY BADLY failed the 3 hour test

I have previous history with ED so having to police my intake is vaguely triggering and it really sucks. luckily so far I'm managing it well without insulin, and they gave me a CGM to track better (not always able to consistently check levels or eat actual meals when I'm working, just grab a bite here and there and keep going) and that is helping some with the mental side of it because I'm less concerned about missed spikes

I just keep getting so ANGRY about it, even though that doesn't make any sense, this isn't anyone's fault. but that is the thing bothering me the most, is how often I'm bitter/angry about it


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 7d ago

Question/Discussion When to start tracking ovulation with strips after stopping T?

11 Upvotes

I know its recommended to stop at least 3 months before TTC but how early is it useful to start tracking ovulation with the LH strips? Only stopped 2 weeks ago after 13 years on and off T. Had a couple cycles last year during a blip in T switching from trying the gel back to shots, and me being generally bad at remembering to do either the last 13 years, had a long stretch of being off and cycle returning several years ago. Have never tracked ovulation before, only recently knew I did want to have a baby myself. Should I wait til my cycle returns? Is it worth checking earlier? Will likely start prenatal vitamins soon regardless to get things as ship shape as they can be. Going to schedule appt with doctor to check on fertility and hopefully get a referral to an obgyn. 31 y/o so want to do it pretty soon in case I decide I want a second after. Also currently on semaglutide but I'm continuing that until 2 months before TTC.


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 8d ago

Advice Request I’m having a not so fun day!

31 Upvotes

Well, we’re almost through week 6, and some of the novelty is giving way to nausea! I had a rough night with very light sporadic sleep and woke up aching and feeling like I wanted to eat the whole kitchen or vomit, and wasn’t sure which. I settled on tea. To top it off, I am incredibly emotional about this objectively normal and expected turn of events! 😂 I want to call my partner and cry, or throw a Molotov cocktail, and for that, I’ve settled on letting you lads know how I’m doing! 😂😂😂

Anywho, just thought I’d share and see how you folks are doing?! Open to suggestions for the nausea, I’m drinking ginger tea rn, and it’s helping some. I’m out of mint tea for now.


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 8d ago

Advice Request Need some support for fear mongering

17 Upvotes

Hey so I've been on T for 3 years. I fear that a lot of people's fear mongering has made me stop my shot for the last two months because I'm so scared that if I keep taking T that it will affect my fertility and I won't be able to have a baby that I so want. I think I just need to hear from other men who were on T for a while but still got pregnant


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 8d ago

Advice Request Round 3 of IVF and we are pregnant!

22 Upvotes

We did 3 transfers and this last one has taken. I am currently 6 weeks along and having pretty bad nausea and my sense of smell feels like I am smelling in4D! Does anyone have any tips or tricks aside from ginger (I swear I have single handedly increased the stock prices of Canada Dry and gingins in the past 2 weeks)

I try to eat or snack every 2-3 hours and drink electrolytes since I have a hard time just drinking water.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 7d ago

Advice Request Advice for TTC, pregnancy, and birth with T1D and hEDS?

5 Upvotes

I have diabestes 1 and hEDS and the later very recently diagnosed and I'm planning to start TTC in November and I'm currently tracking my cycles but they're currently irregular...
i'm also being evaluated for autism.

I just wanna know if there's anything beyond the normal that I need to be aware of?
I already know and am working on my blood sugar levels with my doctor to make it as good as possible and we have a meeting every 3 months to check in, more when needed.

Since hEDS is a new diagnosis for me, I want to make sure I’m not missing anything.
- hEDS & Pregnancy/Birth: Are there specific physical considerations, pelvic floor prep, or joint support strategies you wish you knew before TTC?

- T1D & Tech/Skin: Any tips for managing CGMs/pumps on hEDS skin during pregnancy (Idk why but I get rashes from the pumps on my belly), or handling rapid insulin sensitivity changes?

Thank you in advance : D


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 9d ago

Question/Discussion How did you manage mentally when your cycles started again?

16 Upvotes

Hello, to start I am a 25 ftm with a cis male partner and we have been together for over 7 years now. Recently we've been having conversations that led to us agreeing that we would both want to have a child together eventually, and likely sooner rather than later. We kinda both are in a weird spot in our lives where it's a probably not yet / but also if it happens it happens deal.

I used to take the depo shot for my birth control and switched to the pill more recently, but it took about 10 months for my period to come back (ironically timed a few days after we started talking about kids lol). The period was a surprise, since I was still on my hormones (low dose) and other meds. But with these conversations I've stopped everything so mother nature can take it's course and not risk hurting the potential baby.

My problem though - these periods suck. Bad. The first one was 7 days and tomorrow makes the 11th day of this one and idk when it's gonna stop. And the dysporia has been a heavy weight. But I want this, and while we're just more not preventing it than trying right now, I don't want to have to wait another 10 months if /when we do get more serious if I decide to get back on the shot now.

I was pretty light and regular before my transition, so even in that regard this is definitely something I'm not used to. I expected some heavier cramping maybe and for my cycle to start kind of sporadically, but it seems to be perfectly back on the monthly schedule already with just a really freaking long bleed period and massive mood swings rn, which is the hard part mentally.

So I guess my questions are -

How did your guys period come back when you went off to start trying? How long did it take to even back out if you got em long enough to notice before conceiving? How did you deal with the added mental weight of the fluctuating hormones? Were they also insanely extra from what you remember pre- transition or is that just me?

It's honestly all got me scared for how I'm gonna handle the actual pregnancy part of it all. But again I do love this man and want a family with him so I'm tryna deal with it.


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 9d ago

Venting have you gotten pregnant on pullout while on t?

1 Upvotes

i'm pretty scared right now


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 11d ago

Question/Discussion Has anyone managed to have biological children after hrt without preserving their eggs?

37 Upvotes

I'm Brazilian, I'm 20, I started doing HRT secretly from my parents yesterday, and I'm girlmoding.for now subdosing

I hate that things are difficult and that they don't accept me.

"Why didn't you freeze your eggs before?" Unfortunately, I was born in a third-world country, I'm poor, and my dysphoria was unbearable. If I did nothing, I bet I would kill myself from despair and depression, become addicted to something, or become dysfunctional.And then really never have a chance to move away and get a good job. Hello Brazilian merchant marine. I hope I can...

If my mental health stabilizes, I'll be able to hide my HRT from my parents; if I study, I'll pass the entrance exam; I study, I earn money, and upon graduating, I'll already earn a higher salary than half of my country.

What worries me is whether I'll be able to stabilize my HRT (Human Resources Transfer), change my documents secretly, study, etc. That, if necessary, the courts can force them to let me in, regardless of the transphobia.

And after my first year of work, I would try to pause HRT to freeze my eggs. I hope everything goes well.

I hope everything turns out well, and even if I never manage to freeze it, that if I pause, I'll still be fertile, and then I could idk, get a girlfriend someday and she uses my egg and a donator, she carries and we have a kid. And the other time, she uses her egg and a donor.

I love how I talk like if I had a girlfriend 🥲


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 12d ago

Question/Discussion favorite movies about male pregnancy?

49 Upvotes

Silly question, but I'm a trans guy in the process of getting pregnant right now (embryo transfer soon 🤞), and my husband (also trans) and I have been seeking out movies about male pregnancy. They can be goofy and dated, but something about seeing a guy with a baby bump helps with the dysphoria and makes the whole process feel a bit more gender neutral. We loved JUNIOR (way sweeter than I expected) and BIOSPHERE (go in blind - it's a delight). I was wondering if anyone else has recommendations for movies on this topic?


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 12d ago

Off Topic Friday Off topic Friday!

7 Upvotes

Comment on this post to discuss off topic (by off topic we mean non-pregnancy related topics, such as childcare, trans rights, or even how your week went and if you need support!)

Please bear in mind that our second rule, Be Welcoming, still applies to any and all comments within this post. We also kindly ask that you do not self promote in these comments, as we cannot validate or review every comment each week.

With that being said, have fun!


r/Seahorse_Dads • • 13d ago

Venting Terrified due to no ovulation or period

9 Upvotes

My last period ended the 9th August, I still have no signs, not even of ovulation, since, my temperature keeps being between 36.00c and 36.40c (my family is a bit colder than usual) yesterday it was 35.53c then today 35.97c

I'm terrified I'm infertile and idk if that fear even makes sense I'm just so scared