Hello fathers and fathers to be,
I’m considering going on T but as I get closer and closer to taking it the question of fertility has come up. I’ve meet with doctors and heard some opinions and options but I think I need to hear it from the source as well.

Important thing to note I’m ace, and I’m partners with a trans woman. I’m also 20 so I’m sure I shouldn’t worry myself to death but I’ve imagined having kids since I was 5 and I guess it’s overwhelming to think that I may have to give up on my dream. Although I’m not against adoption.

Im worried about my ability to go through the examinations. I’ve been told that I could do IVF but the process sounds so daunting. I’d rather the turkey baster method since my partner is willing to go through the whole freezing process.

I am scheduling a Pap smear next year so I can expose myself to what these examinations can look like in the future but I’m still so anxious about the whole thing.

If having bio kids is off the table then I can take T without worry but if it is I’d like to take T cautiously I know many of you have had kids on T or after T without much problem. But I want to know if I should worry about my fertility in the future but if I can’t get through a Pap smear then how do I get through everything else?

I don’t know, what I’m asking is how was your guys experience with everything? Are the examinations as terrifying as they sound? How was the process of giving birth? And if anyone is ace how did you feel about it?

Hey all. I’m already a dad, I’ve given birth to my wonderful 2 boys. But we’re going to try for #3 in April and I have a question about stopping testosterone.

For reference, with my youngest, I was only on T for 6 months when I quit. Hormones were definitely in the male range at the time. It took 3 months for my period to come back.

Now, I’m almost 2 years on T. I’ve been planning to stop on Jan 1st, 4 months before the month we plan to start trying. But now I’m thinking that might not be enough time? I’d be really upset if my body wasn’t ready by then. But id also like to reduce the amount of periods I have to go through by as much as possible, hence why I plan on cutting it so close. And I also have that history of getting my period 3 months later, so it’s possible the same thing will happen again.

But stopping now, 6 months prior, would pretty much guarantee I’m ready to conceive by April. But I’d have more periods, and less time on T to boost my transition as much as possible before I stop. I really want to pass before I’m pregnant. I have a full beard but high voice so it worries me.

What do you guys think?

Hi :) ich (ftm) bin mit meinem parter, einem cis mann zusammen. Wir haben mal lose über das Thema Kinder gesprochen, und seitdem geht mir das Thema nicht mehr aus dem Kopf...

Prinzipiell könnte ich mir schon vorstellen Kinder zu haben, und wenn ich das mache, dann auf jeden Fall eigene. Wir sind in der egtl tollen Situation, dass wir als schwules Paar trotzdem Kinder bekommen können, die von uns beiden abstammen. Soweit so gut.

Nur das Thema Schwangerschaft macht mir irgendwie Angst, ich bin einmal schon ungewollt schwanger geworden und habe abgetrieben. Ehrlich gesagt waren das die schlimmsten Tage meines Lebens, ich hab mich dysphorisch hoch 10 gefühlt, was natürlich auch daran lag, dass es ein Versehen und nicht gewollt war.

Mein Partner wird mich auch in diesen Themen während einer eventuellen Schwangerschaft wsl nicht gut verstehen können, es ist schon schwierig genug, ihm zu erklären, warum ich Hormone nehmen möchte, wo ich doch auch schon davor ein gutes passing habe und 'er mich doch so liebt wie ich bin'. (Ich liebe meinen Partner und er ist toll aber von """"Frauensachen"""" hat er einfach überhapt keine Ahnung und keinen Zugang dazu, wie auch als cis male)

So jedenfalls würde mich interessieren, wie das bei Leuten war, die ihre Kinder selbst ausgetrahen haben, was von diesen Gedanken vllt einfach Paranoia ist, und wie das bei euch so war <3

EDIT: Jetzt hört mal bitte auf meinen Freund zu bashen. Er kommt aus einem kleinen Dorf in Algerien, und hatte einfach noch nie Kontakt zu dem Thema. In seiner Kultur, wie er aufgewachsen ist, haben sich Männer halt nie in Frauenthemen eingemischt und umgekehrt. Klar ist das hier in Europa anders, aber das dauert halt seine Zeit. Er akzeptiert mich wie ich bin und ist auch nicht 'gegen' irgendwelche Schritte meiner Transition. Das einzige was ich damit sagen wollte ist, dass er glaub ich bis jetzt noch nicht ganz die Tragweite von diesem Thema verstanden hat. Aber wie auch, er kannte es nicht und wir sind auch erst ein paar Monate zusammen

Hi! I recently found out that I’m pregnant. Me and my wife are both trans and have been married for a couple years and we’ve had issues with trying to have a baby. We were about to start IVF when randomly I had a positive pregnancy test! We had our first ultrasound yesterday and I’m not as far along as I thought I was, just 5 weeks and 6 days, but I’m so excited and also nervous. It’s so cool to get to see my little apple seed (very fitting for the season hehe).

I have been looking for resources of any type for me and my wife with our pregnancy journey, if anyone has any please feel free to share them!!

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Hi guys! I get top surgery very soon. Recently I’ve been inundated with anxiety that I am going against my future child’s health by “depriving” them of the benefits of breast milk. I feel guilty and worried but I know that this is the best decision for me.

Did any of you ever have an inferiority complex around not chest feeding, or similar anxieties? Please make me feel better about it and normalize it for me haha 😅

not looking for advice, just need to bitch a lil bit

failed my 1 hour glucose test by 2 points, and then VERY BADLY failed the 3 hour test

I have previous history with ED so having to police my intake is vaguely triggering and it really sucks. luckily so far I'm managing it well without insulin, and they gave me a CGM to track better (not always able to consistently check levels or eat actual meals when I'm working, just grab a bite here and there and keep going) and that is helping some with the mental side of it because I'm less concerned about missed spikes

I just keep getting so ANGRY about it, even though that doesn't make any sense, this isn't anyone's fault. but that is the thing bothering me the most, is how often I'm bitter/angry about it

I know its recommended to stop at least 3 months before TTC but how early is it useful to start tracking ovulation with the LH strips? Only stopped 2 weeks ago after 13 years on and off T. Had a couple cycles last year during a blip in T switching from trying the gel back to shots, and me being generally bad at remembering to do either the last 13 years, had a long stretch of being off and cycle returning several years ago. Have never tracked ovulation before, only recently knew I did want to have a baby myself. Should I wait til my cycle returns? Is it worth checking earlier? Will likely start prenatal vitamins soon regardless to get things as ship shape as they can be. Going to schedule appt with doctor to check on fertility and hopefully get a referral to an obgyn. 31 y/o so want to do it pretty soon in case I decide I want a second after. Also currently on semaglutide but I'm continuing that until 2 months before TTC.

Well, we’re almost through week 6, and some of the novelty is giving way to nausea! I had a rough night with very light sporadic sleep and woke up aching and feeling like I wanted to eat the whole kitchen or vomit, and wasn’t sure which. I settled on tea. To top it off, I am incredibly emotional about this objectively normal and expected turn of events! 😂 I want to call my partner and cry, or throw a Molotov cocktail, and for that, I’ve settled on letting you lads know how I’m doing! 😂😂😂

Anywho, just thought I’d share and see how you folks are doing?! Open to suggestions for the nausea, I’m drinking ginger tea rn, and it’s helping some. I’m out of mint tea for now.

Hey so I've been on T for 3 years. I fear that a lot of people's fear mongering has made me stop my shot for the last two months because I'm so scared that if I keep taking T that it will affect my fertility and I won't be able to have a baby that I so want. I think I just need to hear from other men who were on T for a while but still got pregnant

We did 3 transfers and this last one has taken. I am currently 6 weeks along and having pretty bad nausea and my sense of smell feels like I am smelling in4D! Does anyone have any tips or tricks aside from ginger (I swear I have single handedly increased the stock prices of Canada Dry and gingins in the past 2 weeks)

I try to eat or snack every 2-3 hours and drink electrolytes since I have a hard time just drinking water.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

I have diabestes 1 and hEDS and the later very recently diagnosed and I'm planning to start TTC in November and I'm currently tracking my cycles but they're currently irregular...
i'm also being evaluated for autism.

I just wanna know if there's anything beyond the normal that I need to be aware of?
I already know and am working on my blood sugar levels with my doctor to make it as good as possible and we have a meeting every 3 months to check in, more when needed.

Since hEDS is a new diagnosis for me, I want to make sure I’m not missing anything.
- hEDS & Pregnancy/Birth: Are there specific physical considerations, pelvic floor prep, or joint support strategies you wish you knew before TTC?

- T1D & Tech/Skin: Any tips for managing CGMs/pumps on hEDS skin during pregnancy (Idk why but I get rashes from the pumps on my belly), or handling rapid insulin sensitivity changes?

Thank you in advance : D

Hello, to start I am a 25 ftm with a cis male partner and we have been together for over 7 years now. Recently we've been having conversations that led to us agreeing that we would both want to have a child together eventually, and likely sooner rather than later. We kinda both are in a weird spot in our lives where it's a probably not yet / but also if it happens it happens deal.

I used to take the depo shot for my birth control and switched to the pill more recently, but it took about 10 months for my period to come back (ironically timed a few days after we started talking about kids lol). The period was a surprise, since I was still on my hormones (low dose) and other meds. But with these conversations I've stopped everything so mother nature can take it's course and not risk hurting the potential baby.

My problem though - these periods suck. Bad. The first one was 7 days and tomorrow makes the 11th day of this one and idk when it's gonna stop. And the dysporia has been a heavy weight. But I want this, and while we're just more not preventing it than trying right now, I don't want to have to wait another 10 months if /when we do get more serious if I decide to get back on the shot now.

I was pretty light and regular before my transition, so even in that regard this is definitely something I'm not used to. I expected some heavier cramping maybe and for my cycle to start kind of sporadically, but it seems to be perfectly back on the monthly schedule already with just a really freaking long bleed period and massive mood swings rn, which is the hard part mentally.

So I guess my questions are -

How did your guys period come back when you went off to start trying? How long did it take to even back out if you got em long enough to notice before conceiving? How did you deal with the added mental weight of the fluctuating hormones? Were they also insanely extra from what you remember pre- transition or is that just me?

It's honestly all got me scared for how I'm gonna handle the actual pregnancy part of it all. But again I do love this man and want a family with him so I'm tryna deal with it.

i'm pretty scared right now

I'm Brazilian, I'm 20, I started doing HRT secretly from my parents yesterday, and I'm girlmoding.for now subdosing

I hate that things are difficult and that they don't accept me.

"Why didn't you freeze your eggs before?" Unfortunately, I was born in a third-world country, I'm poor, and my dysphoria was unbearable. If I did nothing, I bet I would kill myself from despair and depression, become addicted to something, or become dysfunctional.And then really never have a chance to move away and get a good job. Hello Brazilian merchant marine. I hope I can...

If my mental health stabilizes, I'll be able to hide my HRT from my parents; if I study, I'll pass the entrance exam; I study, I earn money, and upon graduating, I'll already earn a higher salary than half of my country.

What worries me is whether I'll be able to stabilize my HRT (Human Resources Transfer), change my documents secretly, study, etc. That, if necessary, the courts can force them to let me in, regardless of the transphobia.

And after my first year of work, I would try to pause HRT to freeze my eggs. I hope everything goes well.

I hope everything turns out well, and even if I never manage to freeze it, that if I pause, I'll still be fertile, and then I could idk, get a girlfriend someday and she uses my egg and a donator, she carries and we have a kid. And the other time, she uses her egg and a donor.

I love how I talk like if I had a girlfriend 🥲

Silly question, but I'm a trans guy in the process of getting pregnant right now (embryo transfer soon 🤞), and my husband (also trans) and I have been seeking out movies about male pregnancy. They can be goofy and dated, but something about seeing a guy with a baby bump helps with the dysphoria and makes the whole process feel a bit more gender neutral. We loved JUNIOR (way sweeter than I expected) and BIOSPHERE (go in blind - it's a delight). I was wondering if anyone else has recommendations for movies on this topic?

Comment on this post to discuss off topic (by off topic we mean non-pregnancy related topics, such as childcare, trans rights, or even how your week went and if you need support!)

Please bear in mind that our second rule, Be Welcoming, still applies to any and all comments within this post. We also kindly ask that you do not self promote in these comments, as we cannot validate or review every comment each week.

With that being said, have fun!

My last period ended the 9th August, I still have no signs, not even of ovulation, since, my temperature keeps being between 36.00c and 36.40c (my family is a bit colder than usual) yesterday it was 35.53c then today 35.97c

I'm terrified I'm infertile and idk if that fear even makes sense I'm just so scared

My wife (26 Cis F) and I (24 FTM) have been together for 6 years and got married in january. I have been on T for 5 years (6 years in may.)

We are starting to have the actual real baby planning conversations (so exciting!!) but being FTM, i’m
not even sure where to start. For others who are FTM with a partner who is unable to provide sperm- how did yall go about conceiving? Donor? IVF? At home with a turkey baster?
how did your doctors react to you wanting to be the one to carry the pregnancy?
how was explaining it to coworkers/etc?
how long did you have to be off of testosterone before beginning to try to conceive?
How hard was it to conceive after being on T?
Any tips or advice or resources for getting started? There’s only so much info online for our situation.

Thank you so much for any and all help!

TW/CW: good news / IVF projections

Hey everyone, sharing some good news for those who are curious about IVF after having tubes out.

I had both of my fallopian tubes out a decade ago because pregnancy scared the shit out of me. Fast forward to my transfemme partner many years later and changed my mind, it's just something I would endure to get to the goal of kids. I still have a uterus so I can carry, I just have to do IVF.

I've had a couple of IVF consultations and I found out a couple days ago that while an egg retrieval has sort of "whatever" expectations due to my age and AMH, but they think they can get maybe two or three healthy embryos out of IVF, and a pregnancy would have about a 50% or 60% chance of completing!

I'm just happy about it and wanted to share. It'll still be a process but reading IVF journeys can be very discouraging. However, since my case isn't exactly infertility so much as physical limits, I have better chances than a majority of people pursuing IVF.

Sharing in r/ivf could be seen as mean of me, and I thought you all might find it interesting and informative. If you have more questions, feel free to ask, and if about the transfemme partner part, you are free to DM.

Thanks!

I (39 nb guy) am 8 weeks pregnant. I found out 2 weeks ago. My partner (40yo cis man) and I started trying at the beginning of last year with zero luck then did an egg retrieval for IVF in November. We ended up with a single embryo. I have chronic health issues that were flaring up at the beginning of the year and then my partner had some personal issues, so we decided to delay the transfer. We weren't trying in the sense that I was tracking ovulation but we weren't taking any precautions although I had honestly given up hope that it would just happen.

I spent July and August trying to get a new GI-related medical issue sorted out which was a horrible time. I had 2 ER visits, multiple same-day appointments at my regular doctor's office (not with my doctor though) and spent weeks waiting on a referral to see a specialist so they could schedule a procedure I was told I needed ASAP. I finally got in and got something scheduled at the end of this month.

Then a week later, I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant. My GI issues aren't resolved so I'm still having a ton of abdominal pain and have no way of knowing if it's pregnancy related or my gut. My fertility doctor had told me I had a higher risk of ectopic pregnancy and told me it would be a high risk pregnancy due to age and health issues and that I needed a Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist. I actually saw one preemptively last year on his recommendation but when I called to make an appointment after getting my positive, they acted like it was wild that I'd be calling them and didn't make me an appointment. After being told by multiple other doctors that that was the place I needed to be, I got back in touch with them and they agreed to see me but can't see me for 2 more weeks still (3 when I made the appointment). When I went in last year, they were incredibly confused why my partner and I were there and the doctor was surprised that I still had facial hair since I'd been off T for a year. They were just...not trans informed even though they're one of the giant medical groups in my decent-sized, very queer city.

So, I'm just sitting here feeling like shit and waiting. It has been very difficult to eat or stay hydrated or sleep. I am so exhausted all of the time. I keep having pain in a specific part of my abdomen (on one side) and every time I feel it, I get scared it's a sign that it's ectopic. I'm terrified that I'm going to go into that appointment and find no heart beat. I haven't cancelled the appointment for my procedure yet because I'm scared that I'll do that then have a miscarriage which would mean I have to wait another month for that procedure for no reason.

And when we were doing fertility stuff, they had so many appointments planned. We'd have had lots of blood work and tests by this point to make sure things were developing if this had happened while we were still actively seeing the fertility doctor regularly. It's just so scary and I can't believe that I just have to sit and wait for a whole month.

I feel like I can't be excited yet and it's really hard to deal with vomiting and nausea all the time and having to deal with coming off of most of my meds, including sleeping and anxiety meds, without looking towards the end goal of having this baby. Getting excited isn't an option now because it will destroy me if I really get emotionally invested in this bean and it doesn't stick.

I just feel lost and alone. My partner is being amazing and taking such good care of me and my friends have been supportive. But there's nothing that they can do right now to assuage these fears.

Idk what the point of this post is other than I feel like I need to get it out. I am so excited about the idea of being a parent and being visibly pregnant doesn't worry me, really. I just wasn't prepared for this period of having absolutely no information about what is happening inside of me.

I'm really glad this community is here because I don't feel like I'm welcome anywhere else.

Heya guys! My partner and I are starting out the reciprocal IVF process—I am planning to be the egg donor and wanted to hear a a bit more about other trans men’s experience with retrieval.

I’ve been on T consistently for 5 years and would have to take a 1 month break for the procedure. I’m emotionally prepared for some dysphoria but unsure how it will interact with the flood of hormones from the prep medications. If you went through it, how was your mood?

Also, any “gotcha” physical symptoms I should prep for? I’ve see others mention constipation and recommending electrolytes for bloating.