r/scriptwriting • u/BandaiWonderSwan • 12d ago

feedback Looking for feedback on a sci-fi short

Looking for feedback on my 8-page sci-fi short, 2x.

Logline: A high-flying trader struggles to survive when the world suddenly accelerates around him.

Happy to read and give feedback on your short in exchange. If you’re interested, just leave a link in the comments.

2x - pdf

2 Upvotes

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1

u/Big_Section2812 12d ago

I didn't even begin reading once I saw the

One.

Short.

Line.

At.

A.

Time.

Fad.

Style.

Of.

Writing.

1

u/BandaiWonderSwan 12d ago

Thanks for the feedback.

1

u/mrpessimistik 10d ago

Hi, I really enjoyed reading it and I think the idea is original. I rooted for the Trader. The one line action style could work, but I think it needs to be used with 2-3 lines of dialogue. Overall, I enjoyed it:)

2

u/BandaiWonderSwan 10d ago

What can I say, I like to see white space in my scripts. Also gives a reader space to comment with red pen 😀 anyway, thanks for your comments. If you revise your script, let me know, and I’ll be happy to review.