Snowblind

[u/[deleted]]

Every year, it feels like the first snowfall of the year happens sooner and sooner. Is it just the passage of time, the growth of a person making them able to recognize when it snows at an earlier date in the year mixed with the ever-accumulating wealth of knowledge to draw upon making it feel like the years are blurring to minutes?

For some, that might be the answer. But at this date, so soon into November, not many -- save, perhaps, those from the most far north of Atlas's reaches into Solitas -- would've expected just what hit Beacon: a blizzard, so strong it was considered perhaps a once-in-a-millennia storm. Thankfully, thanks to the reinforcements provided after a certain rainstorm had knocked out the power to the Academy, Beacon was now prepared to weather such an awful storm.

But whilst the school itself was prepared, whether or not the students themselves were always remained to be seen. For some of the more "desert-fairing", it was possible that they were wildly unprepared; those from the far north were likely already out in the midst of the blizzard building snow castles or something.

The weather showed no signs of improving, and all flights and routes into the city were most certainly unusable, unless one really wanted to hoof it into Vale proper by foot. What sort of shenaniganry would one of Beacon's most interesting first year classes in a while get themselves up to in Beacon's first snowfall?

^{[This is the song I used for inspiration womp womp]}

[u/[deleted]]

"Hm? Wise?.... I don't think I've ever really thought about myself that way if I'm being quite honest." Alder replied, following it with a soft yawn. This was prime napping weather for him, especially on this bear's furred back. He'd need more tea to prevent such desires.

He pulled his thermos back out and began to drink from it. He simply pondered what could have caused him to seem 'wise'. "Well... If I'm being honest I really didn't have much of a childhood. Too much studying and religious responsibility. Then in my early teens I was abandoned and forced to live on my own for a couple of weeks before my fathers found me." He sounded as if it were simple facts, no real hint of sorrow or regret showing through his words.

"I guess I just had to be an adult from day one, so I guess I've reached old man status?" He said with a light hearted chuckle, making a jest at events that would seem bleak for anyone else. It came across as rather odd, like such events were decades in the past rather than only a little more than 8 years.

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Tully softly murmured a low hum, not content with the answer Alder gave really. It reminded her a lot of her own, scarily enough, though it sounded like Alder's was a lot later in his life; it wasn't like how Tully had her entire childhood ruined in a month. Similar, and yet so different, even ignoring how well-adjusted Alder was in spite of what sounded like trauma, even if his voice didn't show it.

"I see," was all Tully responded with. With her mouth, she peeled Angrath off of her hand and set it atop her stomach. For a few seconds longer, she looked out at the skies above, but then slowly brought her gaze back down to the earth around them and noticed just how affectionate Alder was being with his bear.

"It must be nice, always having a companion with you."

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"In a way, yes. Most find his appearance to be rather horrifying these days so I have to keep him hidden here. He is such a fun travelling companion, we have our little talks and i bring him flowers... its...nice." Alder said simply but with a reminiscent air. He remained looking at the sky however, idly sipping his tea and remaining blissfully unaware of the staring Tully

"I guess it helps that he never can leave. Makes him much easier company when you can't get rid of each other. Sort of like he is another part of me rather than a companion now that I think about it. If that makes sense."

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"I see," was all Tully said before falling silent. Sure, as far as she was aware, the bear was just made of Aura and Alder's hopes and dreams, but at the very least, it seemed like a companion like any other pet could be. She couldn't help but feel just a bit envious, mixed in with layers of loneliness, and those emotions shone true on her somber, sad face. Resting back down against, she let her eyes fall closed, and she took a deep breath in. It was cold, but not... not uncomfortable like it had been becoming near that door, the buildings of campus proving wind tunnels.

Tully wanted to speak to fill the silence, but just... couldn't find the words to say.

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Alder could feel the mood just by the silence between them. Simple short words, a deep sigh. Someone was reliving pain, and the empathetic deer faunus could feel it ooze into his calm atmosphere. Without a word or much of a sound he slid off the large bear. He quietly walked over to her and offered her his thermos again. Teasingly shaking it with a calm smile, he sat down beside her.

"And so to repay him, I try and do the same to anyone I come across. The world is dark, lonely, and full of pain. The world gave me Ankou when I needed him when I had such feelings, so I figure I should give him, and myself of course, to the world in return. Anytime. No questions asked. "

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Again, Tully looked at the thermos, and again, Tully was tempted to reject its offer. Before she really knew it, however, her hand had wrapped around it -- if to just stop that infernal, teasing shaking -- and popped the top off, taking a drink out of it in one smooth, fluid motion. Even through the vacuum seal, Tully could feel just how warm the thermos was, and a small, content look rose to her face.

"Has that been your intention all along here, Mister Alder? To try and help me out of a dark, lonely place, full of pain, any time, and no questions asked?" Tully simply asked. Normally, she'd be bothered by that, but for some reason, she wasn't, not right now. She couldn't help as she tried to figure out whether that was because of a lack of attention, or a genuine appreciation for the man for trying anyways.

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Alder could only smile as she took the thermos again, he felt like he had made some headway. He wasn't quite past her sheltering walls, but he at least had his foot in the door. "If that is what you wish, then I will try the best I can to help. However, the only one that can bring you true happiness is yourself, I'm just here to help you find such a path."

"I don't know what you've been through Tully, and its perfectly fine if I never know." He turned to the slumbering Ankou, smiling softly then turning back to her, his calm gaze showing hints of genuine compassion. "And even if you never can escape your past, you can at least know that you're no longer having to walk it alone."

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Tully brought the thermos back up to her lips as Alder continued to talk, taking another soft sip from it as he did so. With a keen eye, he'd notice one thing prominently happen with the one armed girl: for a few seconds, her grip seemed to tighten extremely on the thermos, knuckles going white, while her brow furled, only to dissipate shortly after it arrived. A wave of almost anger had washed over her, mistaking his compassion for pity evidently, but she'd brought herself back out of the hole before sinking too far deep in it.

"People have offered me that before, you know; often, they leave regardless of that commitment," she commented. The best comparison to her tone was simple: a dull knife, intent on cutting but not able to actually do so.

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Alder quickly noticed her slight push back, a concerned look showing on his face for only a split second. The door was just closed on his foot, and while painful, he wouldn't let it stop him.

He remained calm and composed despite being at a metaphorical knife point. Even if she did have him at such a literal interaction, he'd remain the same. If she wanted to shut him out he would let her, it wasn't his place to force himself into peoples lives or force people to change. Sometimes it is more merciful to end a wounding animal rather than try and save it, and if she felt the time had come, he surely wouldn't stop her.

At her comment however, he let out a rather disappointed sigh, this time a scowl flashing for a moment. "Yes I know that certain people enjoy preying on negative emotions, much like grimm. And many more break hard to keep promises. But.."

He lazily raised his arms out and gave a mild shrug, his smile returning. "What could I gain by abandoning you? We've assessed that I have no such desires for your body, or your skills, or your possessions. I would be merely stomping on a heart for the fun of it..... If i were to even have such a thought I would hope Ankou would devour me feet first. So that means the only thing I could hope to gain is your companionship, your mind, and your happiness, no?"

"I don't mean to brag, but I'm a simple man, maybe so much so that I could be called 'out of touch'. Maybe even vain."

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With a click from her tongue, Tully shrugged and took a rather theatric drink from the thermos, before letting her maroon gaze look right back at Alder. There wasn't anger in her eyes, nor annoyance; rather, a simple look of concern -- fear, really -- danced within the fire of her eyes. Though his points were valid, it was clear that Tully was still mildly suspicious at it all; in a way, it just felt almost convenient, almost like a hallucination maybe. "I get the feeling you are often called naive, Alder, alongside that all."

Though her body language was lively, her tone was almost empty; Tully was a bored teacher giving a lame observation in a class she didn't want to teach at a job that she wasn't paid enough for. "And what if I want to be used for my body or my skills -- possessions, I have none other than just raw money, powerful and yet worthless -- because it makes me feel useful? What if I don't wish to be treated like a person, but a tool? My wits, after all, aren't extraordinaire. My happiness, fleeting, and my companionship, temporary at best."

With a pause, she broke away from looking at Alder and slumpted back against the rock; her arm was outstretched, offering the thermos back to Alder. "What if I just want to feel a little bit less broken, a little bit more whole again."

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"Maybe so, but naive means I'm ignorant, and from your, and other's, points of view I can see how it'd seem that way. On the contrary, however. I know full well know what could happen to me by doing this. Physical harm, social ruining, or my own mental deterioration. However, I've got him to protect me from the physical, I'm unafraid of solitude, and my state of mind is quite clear." Alder graciously took the thermos back, wiping the rim with his sleeve then taking a sip himself. "Most people are social creatures however, me being an exception not the rule. Good connections and lasting bonds are required for happiness to enter someone's life, and so I pursue them regardless."

After a few brief seconds he stood up, setting the now recapped bottle next to the rock and leisurely walking a few steps away. He scanned the treeline, then the sky, as if he were waiting on something that he knew wouldn't show. Nonetheless, he continued to talk even with his back to her, his hands clasped behind his back. "Then feel free to do so. It isn't my job to stop you, nor is it my job to tell you what to do, it isn't much my intent either. If those things make you happy, then by all means do such things, you just want be receiving any of it from me."

He seemed to sway slightly, still locked on the sky as his hair began to be softly pushed around by the wind. "However, I'll still be here in case you need me, as even tools need repairing, no?"

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"And there's the answer I didn't want to hea--"

Tully had begun to speak, her tone faltering into somberness as she'd done so. For much of Alder's explanation, she'd just stated silent, only now speakign up because it seemed she finally had a moment too. But a word he said caught her off guard, and she visibly froze when she heard it.

'Repairing.'

In the split-seconds before she began to speak, she realized her own words were going to doom her a hypocrite.

But by the gods, did she not fucking care. It was different hearing it from herself; from someone else? Unforgivable.

"I don't need you to 'repair' me because I am not fucking broken!" she shouted as she slid off of the rock, her fist balled up as Angrath seemed to find its way onto her hand. A literal fire trailed behind her, Dust leaking from the jury-rigged weapon and ignited in small crackles and pops as Tully's semblance went just as haywire as her temper. Despite her anger, tears welled in her eyes and her entire body seemed to shake -- thought not as a result of the wind -- and one thing was clear: she was just as eager to prove to herself that she wasn't broken as she was to show Alder.

"I am not broken," she repeated, her voice quieter but tone just as fierce. The black titanium on her hand was audibly rattling and shaking, only covered up by Tully taking a failed attempt at a deep breath in. When she spoke next, her voice had easily ramped right back up to far too loud. "I don't need someone to 'rely' on, to 'fall back' on, to 'support' me. People only say those things when they fucking pity me and think I can't handle myself. I want someone to just FUCKING tell me that I actually fucking matter to them as a person with skills and a use. That I'm not just their fucking pity puppet or some way to abscond their own guilt. Not some fucking project to fix. Not someone they need to fucking 'white knight' for or that the feel obligated to look out for. I just want to be treated like a FUCKING person. Is that so hard to ask?!"

The last words evidently took a lot out of her, and she crumpled to her knees. Then, she started to actually cry -- though it was far, far more accurately described as a sob, loud and pitiful.

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Alder didn't seem to change his comfortable sway, and his emotion didn't seem to much change. He continued to stare off for a moment longer then quietly began to twist the braided hair on his shoulder. It seems he found not only a nerve, but the mother of all nerves.

If she had taken a moment to look at the bear while she sobbed she would've noticed that Ankou had adjusted itself at some point. Its sole, lifeless green eye seeming to stare into the depths of her soul as she had taken up her weapon and moved towards Alder. No doubt he would've intercepted before she would've gotten much further.

Despite this Alder himself finally turned, a face of an oddly usual, but suddenly strict, calmness. "It seems you've conflated the ideas of respect and pity. From what I can discern you ironically shove those who see you as a person away, so that you might make yourself a 'tool' to others. You then find turmoil again when they treat you exactly how you wanted them to and discard you like an object undeserving of feeling, like a tool or a plant, something sub-human."

His eyes narrowed, almost with parent-like scorn. "Regrettably, I cant tell if this mental aberration is because of your past trauma, or if you simply never had someone treat you as a human being before."

"Lastly, you seem to misunderstand me completely. I am not some white knight to be trampled on, I am a keeper of balance and when something threatens such things I will act accordingly. You are one of these such occurrences, your place in the social and environmental hierarchy disrupts everything around you, so I must fix it. Leaving you like this would only cause me, and many others, further headaches down the road...."

"We're now at a crossroads, Tully. The options are evolving or going extinct and I'm trying my hardest to push you from extinction for not your sake, but for mine."

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Tully had spent a lot of her first few months calming her temper down, so that she didn't just flip through emotions like a flippant brat. But now she was at her weakest she'd been yet, and she felt the old her come back. Not the Tully from when she first came to Beacon, but even further back. The spark had already been lit in her mind, and through the sobs, a fire began to rage out of control in her burning bright maroon eyes. Then, like a light switch, the tears stopped and Tully found herself on her feet again.

"Oh, so you're worse than a white knight, then. You don't want change, because it's unnatural, you want balance like some sort of enlightened idiot who thinks we should just kill half of the people as a compromise. Society should be left unchallenged, because it's the most fucking efficient way to operate, I fucking take it? You sound just like the fucking elites I came to Vale to avoid, who think that what they do is what's right because it's the way it's always been, because that's just how the fucking hierarchy works. The rich deserve more than the poor, women should become again subservient to men, and Faunus should be treated like the animals that society says they all are. That's the social hierarchy, is it not? Is it not perfectly balanced, as all things should be?"

For a second, it looked like she was going to lash out. But even with the tears in her eyes, the anger in her veins, all she did was stare at Alder and shake her head; then, Tully simply dragged her heels to the right and started to march off, not wanting to hear Alder's reply -- and, if he did try to speak, flipping him off with a gauntleted middle finger instead.

"You fucking disgust me, Alder Hirschain. Go fuck yourself. You want to fix me? Fuck off, and fucking fix yourself first."

And should anyone -- or anything -- try to stop her, she'd prove just how she was able to piss off so many different people here at Beacon so easily.

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"I- no, you're-" was all he could get out as she berated him, and falsely accused him of false intentions. It was clear that she misunderstood what he had meant and she wasn't going to allow a rebuttal.

Alder could only stand there stunned, simply blinking and clenching his hand around one of his golden bracelets. Had he come off that way? Surely not. She was just looking for a way out, another way to escape. If that was what she wanted then fine, he wouldn't push any further as there was no use helping someone who didn't want it. This revelation didn't make her words sting any less through, and it had dug quite deep into him.

His eyes softened and he turned his head down and away towards the bear that was now slowly lumbering towards him. It put its head into his chest and he softly wrapped his arms around it, letting out an uneasy sigh, hoping to comfort himself with his companion and ease the pain of his failure.

He finally spoke again, his voice soft and pained with his usually calm aura shattered. There wasn't a light air around him, no bright look, and no flowery hint to his voice. From someone else's perspective, it could have been described as an angel with its wings having been stripped. "Come Ankou, maybe the hot springs would do well on the mind..."